At some point a few years back slappy and bonk gained access to my computer when I was not home, it was automatically logged into the SHL so they decided it'd be funny to post in the dragons locker room pretending they were me... I'll leave it up to your imagination the kind of stuff they said but let's just say it was x-rated. Was definitely a hilarious prank, they got me. I'm just glad they didn't retire my player!

---> ParmBorg Highlights <---



Esa Parmborg || Center || Calgary Dragons || S47 || TPE: 2000+
Name: Esa Parmborg
Age: 18
Height: 7'0"
Weight: 350 lbs
Number: 77
Born: Hella, Iceland
-----------------------
Transactions:
Drafted #1 Overall - Halifax Raiders - S46 SMJHL
Auto Drafted GM - Calgary Dragons - S47 SHL
-----------------------
Awards & Achievements:
S50 Challenge Cup Champion - Calgary Dragons
-----------------------
SHL Statistics:
S50: GP:50 | G:9 | A:8 | P:17 | -3 | PIM:13 | H:34 | PP:0 | SOG:70
-----------------------
SMJHL Statistics:
S46: GP:50 | G:6 | A:9 | P:15 | -8 | PIM:20 | H:44 | PP:0 | SOG:76
S47: GP:50 | G:12 | A:19 | P:31 | 0 | PIM:10 | H:71 | PP:6 | SOG:111
S48: GP:50 | G:21 | A:27 | P:48 | +10 | PIM:20 | H:19 | PP:13 | SOG:147
S49: GP:50 | G:19 | A:29 | P:48 | +18 | PIM:26 | H:48 | PP:13 | SOG:116
TOT: GP:200 | G:58 | A:84 | P:142 | +20 | PIM:86 | H:182 | PP:32 | SOG:450



[pbl]Esa Anrikkanen || C / LW || Calgary Dragons || S18 || 2008TPE
Esa Anrikkanen || C / LW || Calgary Dragons || S18 || 2008TPE
Age: 40
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 255 lbs
Number: 10
Born: Helsinki, Finland
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Career Statistics:
S46: GP:50 | G:14 | A:10 | P:24 | -14 | PIM:21 | H:23 | PP:5 | SOG:126
S45: GP:50 | G:11 | A:13 | P:24 | -10 | PIM:10 | H:28 | PP:7 | SOG:162
S44: GP:50 | G:11 | A:10 | P:21 | -1 | PIM:10 | H:22 | PP:7 | SOG:115
S43: GP:50 | G:15 | A:17 | P:32 | -7 | PIM:2 | H:9 | PP:11 | SOG:137
S42: GP:50 | G:10 | A:20 | P:30 | 0 | PIM:0 | H:4 | PP:7 | SOG:128
S41: GP:50 | G:22 | A:16 | P:38 | +28 | PIM:7 | H:2 | PP:4 | SOG:123
S40: GP:50 | G:16 | A:12 | P:28 | -6 | PIM:18 | H:45 | PP:8 | SOG:118
S39: GP:50 | G:18 | A:14 | P:32 | +12 | PIM:0 | H:4 | PP:7 | SOG:187
S38: GP:50 | G:16 | A:11 | P:27 | -2 | PIM:4 | H:7 | PP:8 | SOG:143
S37: GP:50 | G:19 | A:22 | P:41 | +6 | PIM:4 | H:7 | PP:12 | SOG:224
S36: GP:50 | G:22 | A:21 | P:43 | +15 | PIM:4 | H:18 | PP:8 | SOG:201
S35: GP:50 | G:28 | A:26 | P:54 | +25 | PIM:0 | H:13 | PP:14 | SOG:205
S34: GP:50 | G:24 | A:22 | P:46 | +6 | PIM:52 | H:128 | PP:13 | SOG:208
S33: GP:50 | G:21 | A:16 | P:37 | -2 | PIM:28 | H:78 | PP:13 | SOG:207
S32: GP:50 | G:18 | A:16 | P:34 | -10 | PIM:27 | H:15 | PP:9 | SOG:164
S31: GP:50 | G:20 | A:25 | P:45 | +11 | PIM:48 | H:92 | PP:9 | SOG:198
S30: GP:50 | G:22 | A:33 | P:55 | +17 | PIM:64 | H:134 | PP:18 | SOG:232
S29: GP:50 | G:21 | A:32 | P:53 | +14 | PIM:75 | H:212 | PP:15 | SOG:239
S28: GP:50 | G:23 | A:25 | P:48 | +25 | PIM:60 | H:179 | PP:7 | SOG:205
S27: GP:50 | G:19 | A:18 | P:37 | +1 | PIM:68 | H:94 | PP:8 | SOG:135
S26: GP:50 | G:21 | A:21 | P:42 | +9 | PIM:54 | H:82 | PP:15 | SOG:200
S25: GP:50 | G:18 | A:27 | P:45 | +27 | PIM:42 | H:139 | PP:6 | SOG:154
S24: GP:52 | G:16 | A:18 | P:34 | -13 | PIM:48 | H:156 | PP:16 | SOG:153
S23: GP:52 | G:19 | A:30 | P:49 | +19 | PIM:104 | H:193 | PP:6 | SOG:162
S22: GP:52 | G:17 | A:25 | P:42 | -9 | PIM:26 | H:116 | PP:18 | SOG:156
S21: GP:52 | G:19 | A:22 | P:41 | +5| PIM:14 | H:51 | PP:12 | SOG:168
S20: GP:50 | G:17 | A:16 | P:33 | +10 | PIM:30 | H:71 | PP:8 | SOG:155
S19: GP:50 | G:10 | A:3 | P:13 | +10 | PIM:18 | H:88 | PP:1 | SOG:68
S18: GP:50 | G:7 | A:8 | P:15 | +20 | PIM:24 | H:44 | PP:4 | SOG:73
------------------------------------------------
Totals: GP:1358 | G:514 | A:549 | P:1063 | +186| PIM:868 | H:2054 | PP:277| SOG:4750
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Playoff Statistics:
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards & Accomplishments:
------------------------------------------------------------
Lost my sig, Work in progress.....

#1 All-Time SHL Goal & Point Scorer 
- First 2,000 TPE Player in SHL History - 
- First 400 Goal Scorer in SHL History -
- Only 500 Goal Scorer in SHL History -
- First GM to Win 5 & 6 Challenge Cups -
Esa Anrikkanen Award - SMJHL ROY - Est. S34
Vidrik Onoprienko Award Winner - S45



Esa Anrikkanen || HOF GM || Calgary Dragons || S24 || Cups: 6
----------------------------------------
Seasons: 27
Playoffs: 25
Challenge Cup Championships: 5 (S27, S29, S32, S40, S42, S50)
Cole Reinhart Trophy: 8 (S27, S29, S32, S33, S38, S40, S42, S47, S50)
President's Trophy: 3 (S30, S35, S36, S49)
Division Titles: 6 (S30, S31, S33, S35, S36, S39, S49)
Lance Uppercut Award: S36
Joe McKeil Award: S26
Joe McKeil Award: S30
Joe McKeil Award: S33
Joe McKeil Award: S39
1st GM to Win 5 & 6 Challenge Cups!
----------------------------------------
Reg.Season Record: 774 - 448 - 113 (+543)
S50: 27 W - 20 L - 3 OTL  (+7)
S49: 34 W - 13 L - 3 OTL  (+31)
S48: 24 W - 19 L - 7 OTL (+0)
S47: 28 W - 16 L - 6 OTL (+12)
S46: 24 W - 22 L - 5 OTL (-14)
S45: 22 W - 26 L - 2 OTL (-13)
S44: 28 W - 18 L - 4 OTL (+23)
S43: 27 W - 21 L - 2 OTL (+17)
S42: 29 W - 15 L - 6 OTL (+24)
S41: 29 W - 19 L - 2 OTL (+24)
S40: 31 W - 13 L - 6 OTL (+29)
S39: 33 W - 14 L - 3 OTL (+30)
S38: 25 W - 21 L - 4 OTL (+9)
S37: 25 W - 19 L - 6 OTL (+18)
S36: 31 W - 15 L - 4 OTL (+43)
S35: 36 W - 12 L - 2 OTL (+47)
S34: 26 W - 19 L - 5 OTL (+14)
S33: 30 W - 14 L - 6 OTL (+34)
S32: 27 W - 18 L - 5 OTL (+4)
S31: 32 W - 16 L - 2 OTL (+30)
S30: 35 W - 13 L - 2 OTL  (+55)
S29: 29 W - 15 L - 6 OTL  (+44)
S28: 29 W - 15 L - 6 OTL  (+28)
S27: 27 W - 18 L - 5 OTL (+13)
S26: 31 W - 15 L - 4 OTL  (+16)
S25: 29 W - 19 L - 2 OTL  (+14)
S24: 26 W - 20 L - 6 OTL  (-7)
-----------------SMJHL--------------------
Detroit Falcons GM - S20-S23
Seasons: 4
Four Star Cup Championships: 1 (S23)
President's Trophy: 3 (S21, S22, S23)
Eastern Conference Title: 3 (S21, S22, S23)
Division Title: 3 (S21, S22, S23)
GM of The Year: S23
more to follow.....

a funny thing that happened in the pro baseball experience is when some guy kept tweeting with the #PBESim hashtag for random stuff which constantly clogged the twitter feed on the sidebar of the website.

[S46] Michael Scarn - F - Philadelphia Forge
Drafted #17 Overall Season 45 Draft by Colorado Raptors
Drafted #27 Overall Season 46 Draft by Winnipeg Jets
TPE: 1500 | Lifetime TPE: 2122 | Peak TPE: 2057
============================================================
Career Highlights:
5x SHL Challenge Cup (S55, S56, S58, S61, S63)
2x SHL All-Star 1st Team (S57, S58)
2x SHL All-Star 3rd Team (S55, S56)
1x Sarmad Khan Trophy (S57)
1x Sergei Karpotsov Trophy (S57)
1x IIHF Silver Medal (S53)
2x IIHF Bronze Medal (S49, S54)
============================================================
SHL Regular Season:
SHL S47 (WPG): 50 GP, 15 G, 11 A, 26 P, +/-: +3, 24 Hits
SHL S48 (WPG): 50 GP, 08 G, 15 A, 23 P, +/-: +2, 24 Hits
SHL S49 (WPG): 50 GP, 11 G, 13 A, 24 P, +/-: -9, 33 Hits
SHL S50 (BUF): 50 GP, 12 G, 12 A, 24 P, +/-: +4, 68 Hits
SHL S51 (BUF): 50 GP, 15 G, 15 A, 30 P, +/-: +1, 7 Hits
SHL S52 (BUF): 50 GP, 20 G, 25 A, 45 P, +/-: +3, 8 Hits
SHL S53 (BUF): 50 GP, 19 G, 34 A, 53 P, +/-: +11, 157 Hits
SHL S54 (BUF): 50 GP, 20 G, 38 A, 58 P, +/-: +32, 107 Hits
SHL S55 (BUF): 50 GP, 20 G, 40 A, 60 P, +/-: +34, 123 Hits
SHL S56 (HAM): 50 GP, 13 G, 42 A, 55 P, +/-: +37, 124 Hits
SHL S57 (HAM): 66 GP, 36 G, 57 A, 93 P, +/-: +54, 129 Hits
SHL S58 (HAM): 66 GP, 36 G, 45 A, 81 P, +/-: +11, 141 Hits
SHL S59 (SEA): 66 GP, 18 G, 41 A, 59 P, +/-: +17, 142 Hits
SHL S60 (SEA/HAM): 64 GP, 23 G, 39 A, 62 P, +/-: -7, 112 Hits
SHL S61 (HAM): 66 GP, 27 G, 33 A, 60 P, +/-: +45, 112 Hits
SHL S62 (HAM): 66 GP, 27 G, 43 A, 70 P, +/-: +41, 95 Hits
SHL S63 (HAM): 66 GP, 24 G, 32 A, 56 P, +/-: +43, 82 Hits
SHL S64 (PHI): 66 GP, 23 G, 31 A, 54 P, +/-: +29, 79 Hits

Career: 1026 GP, 367 G, 566 A, 933 P, +/-: +351, 1567 Hits
============================================================
Trophy Case/Achievements:
S44 WJC Gold Medal, Team Czechoslovakia
S46 WJC Gold Medal, Team Czechoslovakia
S48 SHL Cole Reinhart Trophy, Winnipeg Jets
S49 IIHF Bronze Medal, Team Czechia
S52 SHL Nomination for Aiden Richard Trophy - Most Improved Player
S53 IIHF Silver Medal, Team Czechia
S54 SHL Nomination for Jeff Dar Trophy - Best Two-Way Forward
S54 IIHF Bronze Medal, Team Czechia
S55 SHL Challenge Cup, Buffalo Stampede
S55 SHL All-Star 3rd Team
S56 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
S56 SHL All-Star 3rd Team
S57 SHL All-Star 1st Team
S57 SHL Sergei Karpotsov Trophy - Most Points
S57 SHL Sarmad Khan Trophy - MVP Voted by Players
S58 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
S58 SHL All-Star 1st Team
S61 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
S63 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
============================================================
Transactions:
S46 Signed 1 YR / $5.5M contract with Winnipeg Jets
S46 Traded to Halifax Raiders from Colorado Raptors
S47 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Winnipeg Jets
S48 Signed 3 YR / $18M extension with Winnipeg Jets
S50 Traded to Buffalo Stampede from Winnipeg Jets
S50 Signed 5 YR / $30M extension with Buffalo Stampede
S55 Opted out of 1 YR / $6.0M mutual option with Buffalo Stampede
S55 Signed 1 YR / $8.0M extension with Buffalo Stampede
S56 Signed 1 YR / $9.5M contract with Hamilton Steelhawks
S57 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S58 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S59 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Seattle Argonauts
S60 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Seattle Argonauts
S60 Traded to Hamilton Steelhawks from Seattle Argonauts
S61 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Hamilton Steelhawks
S62 Signed 1 YR / $5.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S63 Signed 1 YR / $5.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S64 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Philadelphia Forge
============================================================
Playoff Statistics:
SHL S48 (WPG): 19 GP, 6 G, 8 A, 14 P, +/-: +5
SHL S49 (WPG): 5 GP, 1 G, 0 A, 1 P, +/-: -1
SHL S50 (BUF): 6 GP, 3 G, 1 A, 4 P, +/-: +3
SHL S51 (BUF): 8 GP, 2 G, 3 A, 5 P, +/-: +5
SHL S52 (BUF): 15 GP, 6 G, 4 A, 10 P, +/-: -1
SHL S53 (BUF): 4 GP, 0 G, 3 A, 3 P, +/-: -1
SHL S54 (BUF): 13 GP, 2 G, 6 A, 8 P, +/-: -2
SHL S55 (BUF): 17 GP, 6 G, 7 A, 13 P, +/-: +6
SHL S56 (HAM): 18 GP, 6 G, 13 A, 19 P, +/-: +7
SHL S57 (HAM): 14 GP, 5 G, 9 A, 14 P, +/-: 0
SHL S58 (HAM): 19 GP, 6 G, 17 A, 23 P, +/-: -4
SHL S59 (SEA): 10 GP, 6 G, 3 A, 9 P, +/-: -2
SHL S60 (HAM): 10 GP, 1 G, 7 A, 8 P, +/-: -2
SHL S61 (HAM): 19 GP, 6 G, 15 A, 21 P, +/-: +17
SHL S62 (HAM): 22 GP, 3 G, 11 A, 14 P, +/-: +4
SHL S63 (HAM): 25 GP, 5 G, 9 A, 14 P, +/-: +5

Career: 224 GP, 64 G, 116 A, 180 P, +/-: +39

 

Back when I was still playing hockey, we did secret Santa for the team. Buddy of mine got me a neck pillow and an eye mask for when I sat in the box. I loved it, still have that neck pillow somewhere.

WC: 42 words

Alex Winters||RW||Manhattan Rage||Czechoslovakia #90||COL and STL Alumnus||1755 TPE Peak
Age: 67
Birthplace: Pardubice, Czech Republic
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 225
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Regular Season Stats
S42 | COL | GP: 50 | G: 12 | A: 9 | PTS: 21 | +/-: +2 | PIMS: 8 | Hits: 19 | SOG: 71
S43 | COL | GP: 50 | G: 20 | A: 27 | PTS: 47 | +/-: -6 | PIMS: 18 | Hits: 60 | SOG: 151
S44 | COL/STL | GP: 50 | G: 11 | A: 24 | PTS: 35 | +/-: +2 | PIMS: 22 | Hits: 66 | SOG: 125
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Playoff Stats
S42 | COL | GP: 4 | G: 0 | A: 1 | PTS: 1 | +/-: -1 | PIMS: 5 | Hits: 1 | SOG: 12
S43 | COL | GP: 7 | G: 0 | A: 3 | PTS: 3 | +/-: -2 | PIMS: 2 | Hits: 9 | SOG: 10
S44 | STL | GP: 11 | G: 2 | A: 9 | PTS: 11 | +/-: +6 | PIMS: 4 | Hits: 12 | SOG: 31
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Regular Season Stats
S45 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 18 | A: 24 | PTS: 42 | +/-: +8 | PIMS: 11 | Hits: 28 | SOG: 125
S46 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 19 | A: 21 | PTS: 40 | +/-: -4 | PIMS: 20 | Hits: 63 | SOG: 119
S47 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 11 | A: 16 | PTS: 27 | +/-: -23 | PIMS: 39 | Hits: 64 | SOG: 131
S48 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 20 | A: 21 | PTS: 41 | +/-: -14 | PIMS: 6 | Hits: 42 | SOG: 151
S49 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 22 | A: 28 | PTS: 50 | +/-: +12 | PIMS: 32 | Hits: 84 | SOG: 177
S50 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 13 | A: 26 | PTS: 39 | +/-: +15 | PIMS: 15 | Hits: 29 | SOG: 191
S51 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 15 | A: 29 | PTS: 44 | +/-: +9 | PIMS: 4 | Hits: 47 | SOG: 214
S52 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 19 | A: 35 | PTS: 54 | +/-: +15 | PIMS: 12 | Hits: 35 | SOG: 174
S53 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 14 | A: 24 | PTS: 38 | +/-: +12 | PIMS: 10 | Hits: 31 | SOG: 153
S54 | MAN | GP: 50 | G: 18 | A: 13 | PTS: 31 | +/-: +9 | PIMS: 20 | Hits: 44 | SOG: 123
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Playoff Stats
S45 | MAN | DNQ
S46 | MAN | GP: 12 | G: 2 | A: 4 | PTS: 6 | +/-: -12 | PIMS: 6 | Hits: 13 | SOG: 32
S47 | MAN | GP: 5 | G: 2 | A: 3 | PTS: 5 | +/-: -1 | PIMS: 0 | Hits: 4 | SOG: 17
S48 | MAN | DNQ
S49 | MAN | GP: 11 | G: 4 | A: 3 | PTS: 7 | +/-: -3 | PIMS: 2 | Hits: 8 | SOG: 37
S50 | MAN | GP: 6 | G: 7 | A: 4 | PTS: 11 | +/-: +7 | PIMS: 0 | Hits: 10 | SOG: 31
S51 | MAN | GP: 12 | G: 6 | A: 9 | PTS: 15 | +/-: +1| PIMS: 2 | Hits: 5 | SOG: 49
S52 | MAN | GP: 19 | G: 8 | A: 11 | PTS: 19 | +/-: -1 | PIMS: 0 | Hits: 6 | SOG: 79
S53 | MAN | GP: 6 | G: 0 | A: 4 | PTS: 4 | +/-: -1 | PIMS: 2 | Hits: 6 | SOG: 16
S54 | MAN | GP: 4 | G: 0 | A: 1 | PTS: 1 | +/-: -3 | PIMS: 2 | Hits: 1 | SOG: 9
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions and History
S42: Selected 4th Round, 30th Overall by the Colorado Raptors
S42: Signed $3M Entry Level Contract with Colorado
S42: Scored first SMJHL Goal at 19:26 of the 2nd Period against Kelowna (5-4 L)
S43: Selected 1st Round, 11th Overall by the Manhattan Rage
S43: Finalist for the Ideen Fallah Trophy for League MVP
S44: Traded to the St. Louis Scarecrows
S44: Won Four Star Cup with STL
S44: Finalist for the Zach Miller Trophy for Most Dedicated Player
S44: Named Captain of Czech WJC Team
S44: WJC Gold Medal Czechoslovakia
S45: Scored first SHL Goal at 5:19 of the 1st Period against Minnesota (4-3 L)
S45: Scored first career hat trick in Game #155 against Hamilton (4-3 W)
S45: All-Rookie Team (unanimous selection)
S45: Ryan Jesster Trophy Winner for Rookie of the Year 
S49: Named Captain of Czech World Championship Team
S49: Bronze Medal, World Championship
S50: Became Second player in SHL History to Score Two Hat Tricks in a Single Playoff Series
S50: Named Captain of Czech World Championship Team  
S51: Named Captain of Czech World Championship Team
S51 Shits and Gibbles League Champion
S52: Won Challenge Cup with MAN
S52: Finalist for the Anton Razov Trophy for Playoff MVP
S52: First Team All-Star
S52: Named Captain of Czech World Championship Team
S53: Named Captain of the Czech World Championship Team
S53: Silver Medal, World Championships
S54: Named Captain of the Czech World Championship Team
S54: Bronze Medal, World Championships


Matej Winters||D||Baltimore Platoon||Czech Republic #53||826 TPE Peak
Birthplace: Hradec Králové, Czech Republic
Age: 42
Height: 6'6"
Weight: 208lbs
SMJHL Regular Season Stats
S58 | ANA | GP: 50 | G: 2 | A: 8 | PTS: 10 | +/-: -28 | PIMS: 25 | Hits: 23 | SOG: 55
S59 | ANA | GP: 49 | G: 3 | A: 12 | PTS: 15 | +/-: +2 | PIMS: 8 | Hits: 28 | SOG: 51
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Playoff Stats
S58 | ANA | GP: 7 | G: 1 | A: 1 | PTS: 2 | +/-: 0 | PIMS: 0 | Hits: 2 | SOG: 8
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Regular Season Stats
S62 | NEW | GP: 66 | G: 6 | A: 14 | PTS: 20 | +/-: +4 | PIMS: 4 | Hits: 29 | SOG: 63
S63 | NEW | GP: 66 | G: 4 | A: 5 | PTS: 9 | +/-: -28 | PIMS: 12 | Hits: 21 | SOG: 62
S64 | NEW | GP: 63 | G: 2 | A: 15 | PTS: 17 | +/-: -50 | PIMS: 6 | Hits: 26 | SOG: 63
S65 | NEW | GP: 66 | G: 4 | A: 9 | PTS: 13 | +/-: -53 | PIMS: 16 | Hits: 24 | SOG: 80
S66 | BAP | GP: 66 | G: 3 | A: 25 | PTS: 28 | +/-: -31 | PIMS: 34 | Hits: 71 | SOG: 100
S67 | BAP | GP: 66 | G: 12 | A: 24 | PTS: 36 | +/-: -53 | PIMS: 40 | Hits: 98 | SOG: 147
S68 | BAP | GP: 66 | G: 7 | A: 21 | PTS: 28 | +/-: -35 | PIMS: 42 | Hits: 88 | SOG: 130
S69 | BAP | GP: 66 | G: 4 | A: 9 | PTS: 13 | +/-: -48 | PIMS: 24 | Hits: 59 | SOG: 78
Transactions and History
S58: Signed UDFA Contract with Anaheim Outlaws
S58: Selected 1st Round, 11th Overall by the New England Wolfpack


Dominik Winters||C||San Francisco Pride||Czechia #17||1253 TPE||
Age: 19
Birthplace: Pardubice, Czechia
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 205
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL Regular Season Stats
S70 | STL | GP: 66 | G: 11 | A: 33 | PTS: 44 | +/-: -42 | PIMS: 40 | Hits: 76 | SOG: 108
S71 | STL | GP: 66 | G: 20 | A: 37 | PTS: 57 | +/-: -6 | PIMS: 38 | Hits: 89 | SOG: 163
S72 | STL | GP: 66 | G: 41 | A: 50 | PTS: 91 | +/-: +13 | PIMS: 44 | Hits: 100 | SOG: 275
SMJHL Playoff Stats
S70: Did Not Qualify
S71 | STL | GP: 7 | G: 1 | A: 3 | PTS: 4 | +/-: +3 | PIMS: 0 | Hits: 21 | SOG: 21
S72 | STL | GP: 20 | G: 6 | A: 13 | PTS: 19 | +/-: -6 | PIMS: 13 | Hits: 27 | SOG: 55
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Regular Season Stats
S74 | SFP | GP: 66 | G: 27 | A: 32 | PTS: 59 | +/-: +1 | PIMS: 33 | Hits: 66 | SOG: 214
SHL Playoff Stats
S74 | SFP | GP: 17 | G: 6 | A: 9 | PTS: 15 | +/-: -4 | PIMS: 8 | Hits: 10 | SOG: 36
Transactions and History
S70: Selected 1st Round, 3rd Overall by the St. Louis Scarecrows
S70: Named Alternate Captain of the St. Louis Scarecrows
S71: Selected 1st Round, 5th Overall by the San Francisco Pride
S72: Won 4-Star Cup over Maine
S72: Selected for S72 All Star Game

Alex Winters (retired)
Matej Winters (retired)
Dominik Winters
S45 Jesster Trophy Winner
Challenge Cup Winning Goal Club: S52

We used to play this game called "Rob from your neighbor" at Christmas where everyone gets buys a bunch of cheap presents and you put them in the middle. if you roll doubles you get to take a present from the middle, and once all the middle presents are gone, once you roll doubles you steal from someone else. Well we had this "hand exerciser" which was literally just a block of wood you squeezed and it was supposed to strengthen your grip, it was so stupid. but we gave it every year, and in order to trick people into getting it, we put it in increasingly wacky packages. One year someone put it in a bag that was shaped to look like a bottle of wine, so people would really want it. it was an epic troll

a long time ago stud made a media post with like a fake hacked email of the shl commish and it was pretty funny with tons of emails and topics on current or past ongoing dramas that the commish could be having to deal with

Adam Kylrad || LW || Retired
Name:Adam Kylrad
Age: 20
Height: 6'1" Weight: 190 lbs Number: 12 Nationality: Canadian
------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics
S11 PGF/CHI: GP:38 , G:6 , A:3 , P:9 , +/-:-23 , PIMS:22 , H:70 , SB:10
S12 LAP: GP: 50, G:15, A:14, P:29, +/-:0, PIMS:6 , H:20 , SB:8
S13 LAP: GP: 45, G:14 A:19 p:33 +/-: -29 PIMS: 6, H: 73 SB: 17
S14 LAP: GP:50 G:28 A:27 P:55 +/-:15 PIMS:20 H:64 SB:21
S15 LAP: GP:50 G:17 A:14 P:31 +/-: -2  PIMS:25 H:39 SB:19
S16 LAP: GP:50 G:24 A:37 P:61 +/-: 24 PIMS:0 H:10 SB:8
S17 LAP GP:50 G:12 A:20 P:32 +/-:16 H: 10 PIMS:0 SB:6
S18 LAP/MIN GP:50 :G:18 A:18 P:36 +/-:12 H:35 PIMS:12 SB:6  
S19 TOR GP:50 G:26 A:34 P:60 +/-:8 H:109 PIMS:40 SB:12
S20 TOR GP:50 G:14 G:13 P:27 +/-6 H:108 PIMS:18 SB:6
S21 TOR GP:52 G:25 A:24 P:49 +/-13 H:79 PIMS:32 SB:7
S22 TOR/SEA: GP:52 G:14 A:26 P:40 +/- 4 H:52 PIMS:20 SB:12
S23 SEA: GP:52 G:21 A:20 P:41 +/-: -12 H: 122 PIMS: 44 SB: 15
S24 SEA: GP: 52 G:13 A:23 P:36 +/-2 H:99 PIMS:36 SB:11
S25 SEA: GP: 50 G:22: A:28 P:50 +/-:-7 H:97 PIMS:28 SB:18
S26 SEA: GP:50 G:20 A:30 P:50 +/-:25 H:7 PIMS:0 SB:5
S27 SEA/TOR GP:50 G:17 A:17 P:34 +/-:-3 H:10 PIMS:2 SB:6
S28 TOR: GP50 G:16: A:17 P:33 +/-9 H:65 PIMS 26 SB:6
S29 TOR: GP 50 G:15 A 13 P 28 +/- -3 H 44 PIMS 27 SB 8
S30 TOR: GP 50 G 10 A 17 P 27 +/- -12 H 26 PIMS 8 SB 8
S31 TOR GP 50 G 13 A 11 P 24 +/- 9 H 10 PIM S9 SB 4
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SHL Career Totals: GP:1003 G:354 A:422 P:776 +/-:75 PIMS:359 H:1079: SB:198
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Playoff Statistics
S11 CHI: GP:6 , G:2 , A:2 , P:4 , +/-:0 , PIMS:4 , H:14 , SB:1
S14 LAP: GP:6 , G:3 , A:1 P:4, +/-:0  PIMS:0, H:5, SB:4
S16 LAP: GP:6 , G:1 , A:1 P:2 +/-:0 PIMS:0 H:0 SB:1
S17 LAP: GP:20 G:8 A:3 P:11 +/-:5 PIMS:4 H:25 SB:4
S18 MIN: GP:20 G:8 A:6 P:14 +/-: -3 PIMS:4 H:17 SB:0
S19 TOR: GP:6 G:2 A:1 P:3 +/- -3 PIMS:6 H:18 SB:1
S20 TOR: GP:6 G:4 A:1 P:5 +/-:4 PIMS:13 H:17 SB:0
S21 TOR: GP:7 G:1 A:2 P:3 +/- -4 PIMS: 2 H:8 SB:1
S22 SEA: GP:4 G:0 A:5 P:5 +/-:0 PIMS 4 H:7 SB:1
S23 SEA: GP:14 G:4 A:9 P:13 +/-:3 PIMS:6 H:28 SB:0
S25 SEA: GP:11 G:4 A:2 P:6 +/-: -5 PIMS:4 H:27 SB:2
S26:SEA: GP:16 G:4 A:5 P:9 +/-:-6 PIMS 0 H:4 SB:0
S27 TOR: GP:9 G:2 A:5 P:7+/-:2 PIMS 8 H:9 SB: 0
S28: TOR: GP:5 G:0 A:3 P:3 +/- -2 PIMS 2 H:5 SB:0
S29 TOR GP: 11 G 5 A 2 P 7 +/- -1 PIMS 2 H18 SB 2
S31 TOR GP 12 G 2 A 5 P 12 +/-4 PIMS 0 H 1 SB 0
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SHL Career Playoff Totals: GP:153 G:48 A:51 P:99 +/-:-14 PIMS:55 H:189: SB:16
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Transactions:
------------------------------------------------------------
Signed 1-yr/$2mil deal with Prince George
Traded to Chicago
Drafted 12th Overall to LAP, Signed 3-yr/$10mil deal with LAP
Extended 2-yr/$6mill deal with LAP
Extended 2-yr/$6mil deal with LAP
Extended 1-yr/1.5mil deal with LAP
Traded to Minnesota Chiefs
Extended 3-yr/$65mil deal with MIN
Traded to Toronto North Stars
Signed 4 years/20mil deal with Tor
Traded to Seattle Riot
Signed 2-yr/$16mil deal with SEA
Extended like 50 times with sea, traded to TOR
Extended like 50 times with TOR
Robbed a bank
Retired after S31
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Awards:
S11 Named Prince George Firebirds Assistant Captain
S11 Named to Team Canada WJC (BRONZE)
GP:14, G:11, A:6, P:17, +/-: -4, PIMS:12, H:28, SB:5,
S11 Named to NWJHL All Star Game
S12 Named Los Angeles Panthers Assistant Captain  
S12 Named to IHF Team Canada as Water Boy
S12 Named to IHF Team World left team Canada as Water Boy
S13 Named Los Angeles Panthers Captain
S13 Named Vancouver Whalers Co Gm
S14 Named Kelowna Knights GM
S14 Names to IHF Team Canada (WON GOLD)
S14 Winner of the Jeff Dar Trophy
S14 Winner of the Jay Mcdonald Trophy
S14 MVP Nominee
S14 All Star Team
S15 All Star Team
S15 Named to IHF Team Canada (5th)
S17 Won the Challenge Cup
S18 Won gold medal with team Canada
S21 Won gold medal with team Canada
Won like 500 more medals with canada, gmed Canada
Probably did a bunch more legendary stuff
Inducted into the Hall of Fame
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Kyle Kylrad || LW || Winnipeg Jets
Name:Kyle Kylrad
Age: 18
Height: 6'1" Weight: 195 lbs Number: 12 Nationality: Canadian
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Career Statistics
S31 DET: GP:50 , G:15 , A:12 , P:27 , +/-:2 , PIMS:12 , H:40 , SB:12
S32 DET/HFX: GP:49 , G:16 , A:15 , P:31 , +/-:1 , PIMS:14 , H:25 , SB:12
S33 HAM: GP: 50, G:12, A:15, P:27, +/-:3, PIMS:20 , H:84 , SB:5
S34 HAM: GP: 50, G:16 A:14 p:30 +/-: 1 PIMS: 40, H:132 SB: 6
S35 HAM: GP:50 G:17 A:19 P:36 +/-:-7 PIMS:20 H:134 SB:15
S36 SEA: GP:50 G:26 A:31 P:57 +/-:25 PIMS:34 H:122 SB:16
S37 SEA: GP:50 G:20 A:22 P:42 +/-:16 PIMS:40 H:160 SB:3
S38 SEA: GP:50 G:23 A:23 P:46 +/-:-8 PIMS:32 H:124 SB:12
S39 WPG: GP:50 G:22 A:18 P:40 +/-:10 PIMS:14 H:97 SB:14
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Daniel Smeb || C || Chicago Syndicate                               
Name: Daniel Smeb
Age: 18
Height: 6'1" Weight:190 lbs Number: 7 Nationality:Korean
------------------------------------------------------------
Career Statistics
S45 COL: GP: 50 G:8 A:15 P:23 +/-: 3 PIMS:4 H:15 SB:6
S46 CHI: GP: 50 G:2 A:18 P:20 +/-: 6 PIMS:26 H:37 SB:14
S47 CHI: GP: 50 G:7 A:18 P:25 +/-: -9 PIMS:13 H:21 SB:6
S48 CHI: GP: 50 G:9 A:13 P:22 +/-: -19 PIMS:6 H:26 SB:10
S49 CHI: GP: 50 G:13 A:21 P:34 +/-:-10 PIMS:9 H:19 SB:20
S50 CHI: GP: 50 G:9 A:29 P:38 +/-:-14 PIMS:7 H:28 SB:11
S51 CHI: GP: 50 G:19 A:26 P:45 +/-:8 PIMS:34 H:104 SB:10
S52 CHI: GP: 50 G:20 A:34 P:54 +/-:21 PIMS:7 H:12 SB:19
S53 CHI: GP: 50 G:24 A:22 P:46 +/-:-6 PIMS:36 H:54 SB:15
S54 CHI: GP: 50 G:31 A:39 P:70 +/-:26 PIMS:11 H:44 SB:42
S55 CHI: GP: 50 G:26 A:42 P:72 +/-:31 PIMS:10 H:46 SB:46
S56 CHI: GP: 50 G:20 A:39 P:59 +/-:26 PIMS:18 H:77 SB:36
S57 CHI: GP: 66 G:30 A:53 P:83 +/-:50 PIMS:22 H:98 SB:45
S58 CHI: GP: 66 G:24 A:44 P:68 +/-:14 PIMS:21 H:144 SB:38
S59 CHI: GP: 66 G:23 A:43 P:66 +/-:45 PIMS:2 H:129 SB:43
S60 CHI: GP: 66 G:19 A:45 P:64 +/-:63 PIMS:8 H:96 SB:11
S61 CHI: GP: 66 G:16 A:35 P:51 +/-:17 PIMS:10 H:28 SB:1
S62 CHI: GP: 66 G:16 A:30 P:46 +/-:54 PIMS:28 H:29 SB:3
S63 CHI: GP: 66 G:13 A:25 P:38 +/-:18 PIMS:4 H:98 SB:2
S64 CHI: GP: 66 G:15 A:32 P:47 +/-:14 PIMS:12 H:52: SB:4
S65 CHI: GP: 66 G:12 A:23 P:35 +/-:23 PIMS:18 H:51: SB:2
S66 MIN: GP: 66 G:17 A:36 P:53 +/-:-44 PIMS:34 H:88: SB:16
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Career Totals: GP:1210 G:365 A:667 P:1036 +/-: 193 PIMS:284 H:674 SB:383
------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Statistics
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Career Playoff Totals: GP: G: A: P: +/-: PIMS: H: SB:
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
Drafted 54th Overall to COL
Signed 1 yr/$3M deal with COL
Drafted 30th Overall to CHI
Signed 1 yr/$1M deal with CHI
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards:
S45: Team World WJC Gold Medal
S50: IIHF Top Forward
S52: 2nd all star team
------------------------------------------------------------

I think my favorite category of hockey pranks is when the mascot sits in a trash can or something and jumps out and scares the players walking into a locker room. They always have great reactions.

a good prank that happened to me one time a few years ago is I was sent a link to what I thought was something interesting to instead be led straight to an excellent music video by Rick Astley. I wasn't expecting it and gave a hearty laugh

Aleksander Kozlov | C | 2027 TPE | Tampa Bay | Russia | S56

Name: Aleksander Kozlov

Born: February 4th, S38

Height: 6'2"

Weight: 208 lbs

Number: 13

--------------------------------------

Drafted 5th overall by Carolina Kraken in S55 SMJHL Draft 

Drafted 1st overall by Tampa Bay Barracuda in S56 SHL Draft

Gary Grease | D | 2031 TPE | Winnipeg Jets | Team Canada | S39-S54
Name: Gary Grease
Born: June 24th, S21
Height: 7'7"
Weight: 354 lbs
Number: 99
------------------------------------------------------------
History
S38: Drafted 19th overall by Colorado Mammoths
      Signed 1-yr/$3mil deal with Colorado Mammoths
S39: Drafted 12th overall by Winnipeg Jets
      Signed 3 year ELC with WPG
      Named Captain of Colorado Mammoths
      Won WJC Gold with Team Canada
S40: Called up to Winnipeg Jets
S41: Signed Extension With Winnipeg: 2x2million
S43: Won Aiden Richan Trophy (breakout star)
S44: Won challenge cup
S45: Won Turd Ferguson Trophy (most PIMS)

S56 1st Overall

Gary Grease Career Stats: Click Here
Graphics Shop: Click Here

   

My joke is short and sweet. How does a rock pee? He Dwaynes his Johnson. Or also why didn’t Snape get the herbology job? He couldn’t keep the lilies alive.

Teddy Murphy 4 Teams S58-S70 | 6OA (BAP)
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Career Stats
GP 858|G 125|A 273|P 398|+/- 29|ATOI 20:13|FW 3|GR 62

---------------------------------------------------
Accolades
S59 All-Rookie Team (First ever Sophomore to make the team)


Teddy Park Kelowna Defenseman S54-57 | 29OA
---------------------------------------------------
Career Stats
GP 216|G 23|A 72|P 95|+/- 17|ATOI 21:32|FW 12|GR 66
---------------------------------------------------
Accolades
[url=https://simulationhockey.com/showthread.php?tid=106300][/url]Captain S55-57
S57 All-Star

My favorite Mitch Hedberg joke:

I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me. Because there's a large, out-of-focus monster, roaming the countryside.

Colin Lambert ll Left Defence ll Barracuda