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*leviadan* · 06-06-2022, 12:14 AM

We all knew this day would come. The SHL advertising executives are no longer satisfied by commercials, stickers on helmets, or logos on the boards. By this time next week, the ice has got to go. "Does it have to be frozen water?" they ask. "Water is so... boring."
Your task: Explain what highly marketable frozen liquid you're going to replace all SHL ice with, and why it's better than boring old water.

25 words minimum!

You will receive 1 TPE for fulfilling all requirements.

This PT will close Sunday, June 12th at 11:59pm PST. Posts submitted/edited after the deadline will receive 0 tpe.

If you have any questions/concerns, please PM me. Tasks with malicious intent will not be graded. Graders reserve the right to determine what is malicious. You will not be warned.

This PT is for SHL players and send downs only; it is not for SMJHL Rookies.

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***yosh*** · 06-06-2022, 12:18 AM

Cherry Kool-Aid. It can then be served as part of some disgusting concession marketing thing. Okay, the secret marketing ploy is to serve actual kool-aid, and the ice isn't actually kool-aid, but water that has red food colouring.

*Jayba1t* · 06-06-2022, 12:21 AM

I think all SHL ice is gonna be replaced by frozen Gatorade. The fit just makes so much sense and when players need a refresher they can lick the ice uh never mind

**JamesT** · 06-06-2022, 12:21 AM

Code:
Your task: Explain what highly marketable frozen liquid you're going to replace all SHL ice with, and why it's better than boring old water.

The highly marketable frozen liquid that Ben Jammin has come up with is frozen iced tea! Ben is a huge iced tea fan so this was the first thought that came to his mind when the league asked him what to replace the SHL ice with. I'm sure playing on frozen iced tea is fine and won't hurt the game of hockey.

(62 words)

***hockeyiscool*** · 06-06-2022, 12:48 AM

I replace all of the ice with Brawndo: THE THIRST MUTILATOR!!! Brawndo is the best tasting and most adaptable energy drink available. Whether it’s before the gym or at a party, Brawndo will give you the boost you need with no bitter after-taste, crash, or jitters. It's has electrolytes, It's what plants crave.

Matteo · 06-06-2022, 12:56 AM

Instead of ice cubes, try new Tropicana Cubes. These frozen treats are great on your own, or put them in your drink to give it a refreshing orange juice flavour. Tropicana Cubes, the official frozen cubes of the SHL.

***_Blitz_*** · 06-06-2022, 01:00 AM

The SHL now skates on solid potassium. Hockey is a fast-paced game that leads to a lot of exertion, a lot of sweat. Sodium and potassium combined with water creates hissing, spitting fire balls. The thought is that as the games progress, the fire hazard and difficulties also increase.

Better get that Stamina to 20!

Tesla · 06-06-2022, 01:47 AM

The key to this whole idea is that it needs to be better than plain water and so the solution is to make it fun. Going by this we are going with slushy flavorings that will be different for all the separate rinks. Chicago calls cherry because this is my idea and that is my preferred flavor, but beyond that we can just let the teams duke it out for the rest of the flavorings.

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Word Count: 75

*Carpy48* · 06-06-2022, 02:23 AM

Obviously the first choice was iced coffee but we needed something even darker so a frozen version of salmiakkikossu it is. The pucks obviously had to be white instead of black so you could still see them on there. Zambonis would then collect all the 'material' for after-game drinks (since it would melt again and be in liquid form) so it's a perfect solution for everyone involved.

High Stick King · 06-06-2022, 02:33 AM

I think I am going to go with Tang. If it is good enough for astronauts, we can use it to skate on. No other reason really.

[ 27 words ]

bjkman · 06-06-2022, 03:07 AM

They call it Ice Hockey for a reason, but now we're changing it. But damn if we're gonna change it; it's still gonna be Ice hockey! Ice the sparkling flavored beverage! A pretty great substitute if you as me!

Code:
39 Words

*Evil_AllBran* · 06-06-2022, 03:25 AM

From now on all basic water used to make ice will be replaced with Vitamin Water. Vitamin Water is superior to regular water in every single way (please don't ask for specifics trust me 50 Cent owns part of Vitamin Water so it has to be legit).

Salming · 06-06-2022, 03:38 AM

All SHL ice will be replaced by Coca-Cola.. The ice will change its colour to black and at the same time the colour of the puck will be changed for a white. That way contrast between puck and ice is better than ever before and crowd will enjoy it.

dankoa · 06-06-2022, 04:37 AM

Diet Mountain Dew is soon to be used as the skating surface for both the SHL and the SMJHL. The high levels of chemicals it contains will actually work better than frozen water, and the fucking sick colours will really help to make the league look a lot cooler than it does already.

*RashfordU* · 06-06-2022, 05:50 AM

The Aurora have partnered with Jones Soda thanks to their star shutdown defender Jaeger Jones. The vast colour options among their product line will allow for a unique fan viewing experience each night

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