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SMJHL News Hour
#1
(This post was last modified: 03-30-2023, 03:42 PM by spidey. Edited 1 time in total.)

What an incredible couple of days it has been in the SMJHL, the preseason is now complete and teams are vying for position to capture a playoff spot. There is still a long road ahead of us to determine who will make it to the playoffs. Still who knew at 1/6th of the season so much would have already happened in the SMJHL, lets take a look at all the latest news and events!

Trades and Free Agent movement:

The St. Louis Scarecrows tried to claim undrafted free agent Sillysauce McTartersauce. McTartersauce is a left defenseman coming out of Boston College, clearly that education was working because he made sure to run away from St. Louis as fast as he could. Billed at 6’9” 290 pounds, McTartersauce is a mountain of a man to play against. Despite his impressive size he is more of an offensive threat then a defensive punishing defenseman, and he can skate like the wind.

St. Louis Trades McTartersauce for essentially just a 3rd round pick (there were 4th rounders exchanged as well) to the Main Timber, remembers that part about being smart, scratch that. Going from St. Louis to Maine is like going from making out with your hot cousin and then making out with you hot aunt. I suppose if that is something you are into then so be it, but not the place I would have chosen to go.

Next up the Carolina Kraken picked up Aumy Junior II. Clearly not a great choice by either participant. Aumy can’t even spell her name right, being called Junior already means you are the second or II, and Carolina is well Carolina (look to hot cousin comment from earlier and replace it with ugly uncle). Still Aumy looks to be a tremendous player of the future, a center coming out of Finland playing junior II level. Aumy is good in the faceoff circle, has an amazing shot up close with god passing. Aumy looks to be responsible in her own zone to and could develop into a real good two way threat.

In a shocking move Theodore Svatos said go to hell to Detroit Falcons demanding a trade out of the organization or he would piss and shit all over the locker room. This was not an idle threat as Svatos had already clogged the teams showers twice unloading in there. Detroit decided it was easier and cheaper to move him then continuing to pay for a plumber to fix the drainage and moved him to a place that specializes in pipes the Yukon. And just like that the Malamute have a new puppy they need to house train. This move cost the Malamute a 1st round pick next year, and defenseman Dan Geer.

The Timber were able to dive back into the free agent pool once again and they picked up another great member. You would think the cries of terror from Bear’s future teammates would have been a warning. Still Bear Trapp signed on with the Maine Timber and now she has to suffer just like McTartersauce. Bear is a left winger coming out of Chicago. Bear is more of a setup man at this point in his career but has the ability to shoot the puck very well. Bear is good on defense and aggressive with or without the puck.

So to recap:
Maine Timbers have cleaned up in the free agent department, while the rest of the league cries.
Theodore was sent away because he couldn’t use the potty.
Kraken signed on someone who can’t spell their name correctly actually that may be the right place for Aumy.

Punishment News:

Setoah, an undrafted free agent, was all but wiped out from the SHL community for using slurs. While I am a big fan of giving second chances and hoping people learn and grow. He chose to move on, on his own accord not too long after getting punished. This honestly may have been for the best for everyone involved.

In other news, if you aren’t cheating you aren’t trying. The Scarecrows tried their best but were caught with their hand in the proverbial cookie jar. And their General Manager was handed a severe punishment for doing this. Even their recent add Co-Manager had his hand slapped pretty hard from this punishment. Still, we got to give them points for trying, and they would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for you meddling kids!

Biggest shocks of the week!

How do you go from 1st to worst in one off season? Follow the Quebec Citadel’s off-season strategy… If you can find it let me know. Won the cup last year (huge congrats to them) and followed it up by starting the season with a league low. I will be honest this one is beyond my understanding, they have the scoring talent, they have decent goaltending, their defense looks good on paper, And they didn’t have that much turn over from last year to this year.

In turn, congrats to Vancouver making the biggest jump up in the standings with one of the youngest rosters in the league. Moving from 3rd last to 3rd in the league. I am sure we all thought Vancouver stood a chance to move up in the standings, but we all expected them to move up in the second half when their rookie core really developed.

Congrats:

Congrats to the Kraken, they own the top two in Goals and Points in the league Derek Martin and Johnny Wanger-Svenson both with 9 goals, Martin owning 18 points, Wagner with 16 points. That is an amazing accomplishment in 10 games.

Give it up for the Maine Timber, 5 players in the top 10 for scoring this year! That is ridiculous, and 4 of them are in the top 6! Looks like my off-season training is cutting down a forest.

And Sorry:

You have to feel for Andre Santiago, the guy has been a beast for the Regina Elks posting some of the best numbers in the league with a save percentage of 0.932 and a GAA of 1.89. But he is mostly keeping the bench warm compared to rookie net minder Ally Mathieson as she has struggled to get her footing early in the SMJHL. Andre has started 3 games to Ally’s 6. I understand wanting to see what the rookie has to offer and giving her a chance, but shouldn’t that be a second half of the season thing with spot duty in the early part of the season?

We are only a few days in but already 1/6th of the season has been played for a few teams and jockeying for playoff pecking order is well underway.

Upcoming Games of the week:

Great Falls Grizzlies vs Maine Timbers, two of the best teams in the league are set to slug it out. Both teams have done well at putting the puck in the net and keeping it out of their own. Could this be a match up of an immovable objects meets an unstoppable force? Or will it be a high scoring affair that will leave the league in awe.

Detroit Falcons vs Quebec City Citedals, they are both known for letting a lot of pucks into the net. This will be a high scoring game and will be a very entertaining 3 periods. Could this be the game that help get Quebec back on track?

Final Shoutout:

A big shout out to Finn WeiB in the top 15 for scoring as a rookie! That is a hell of an accomplishment. As one rookie offensive forward to another, keep it up brother and take that scoring crown!

Good Luck everyone over the next few games!

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#2

Who told you all of this?! This is sealed information!

“The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again. ... There are neither beginnings nor endings to the Wheel of Time. But it was a beginning.”

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#3

Lol

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#4

Whoops in the wrong media section.

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#5

*Doesn't realize that STL is not exactly going amazingly right now while Maine is insane*
Ngl I think McTatterSauce will be fine here, I sense an anti-Timber bias.

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#6

03-30-2023, 03:47 PMSeany148 Wrote: *Doesn't realize that STL is not exactly going amazingly right now while Maine is insane*
Ngl I think McTatterSauce will be fine here, I sense an anti-Timber bias.

Not true I gave you guys a congrats on scoring leaders.

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#7

03-30-2023, 03:55 PMspidey Wrote: Not true I gave you guys a congrats on scoring leaders.
Not good enough /j

Thank you to @Revontulete for the sig![Image: Edzus_Ozolins.png?ex=661b6612&is=6608f11...0f071bc3c&]
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#8

03-30-2023, 05:49 PMSeany148 Wrote: Not good enough /j
Fine I will make a Maine Timbers Spectaular Celebration next.


You asked for it. Laughing

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#9

Good stuff! Cheers

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#10

[Was posted in SHL media, moved it here]

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Ekaterina Valieva - Baltimore Platoon

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Thanks @Lazyeye for the sig!
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#11

Great article! I feel so informed!
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