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Lunatyck · 03-21-2019, 04:04 PM

Halo.

Przemek here once again to telling you latest update from motor city Detroitski. As you knowing by now, us Falcons no having best season but constant making improvement every game. New rookie players like myself, Wibbly McButternutz, Espen Knutsen Jr, and others all working very hard to improving our playing to win more games. However, this new liga is no very easy and we having many close games but unfortunate not many have going our way. ANYWAY, lets not get too much detail into seasonal statistic but lets talk about what have happening since last update where I pounded pussy Pavel into ground.

As you can imagine, no one trying to fuck with me anymore after image of Pavel has circulate around media and liga website. Everyone is saying I am crazy Polak and that referee should have stopping fight earlier but that is not a topic I want to continue any longer. Remember, Przemek is here to have silkiest mitts in whole liga and by that I mean making excellent passing play or scoring, not necessary slapping around bitch czech or ruski on ice. Since coming over to Amerika, I have maintain my progress 100% and no have missing any opportunity to increase my skill set. I have been continuous upgrading every part of my game, even if that means spending 50 years of salary pay in Polska on new shiny equipment, such as Graff skate or sexy CCM stick. While Papa Mirek and Mama cannot believing the amount of money I have need spending on such things, they understanding that it is necessary for me to be top tier player in this liga. I konstant reminding Papa Mirek that if I making to SHL, I making even more millionski and then I can buy as many traktor, land or cow in Poland as I can count (or more!).

Now that we have playing 48 games this season, I am still no happy that I cannot find more points but last practice coach pulls me to side and telling me - "Pussy Blaster, don't worry about points now. This is your first year and we know you were a stud back across on the other side of the pond but the game here is different. It's on a different level and the tempo isn't the same. We see you're working hard and putting your best foot forward so we're going to throw you up on the third line to let us shine." I very happy hearing that I am getting more time on ice to play and move to third line, but I think coach might be a bit confusing because he telling me I will be playing right winger. I no saying anything because I don't want to upsetting coach but this information is very confusing me because I play whole life left wing, and now I have to learn new position after having to learn how play already on new ice! Kurwa Mac! Is never ending here. But I no worry because I am ready to take on new responsibility. I have improving my defense, my skating, my endurance (pierogi only two times a week not three, no papieroski, and drinking only 4 times a week), and now with new positing I even practice my scoring to hopefully producing more offense. With only a few games left in regular season, maybe I can finding some more points to head into playoffs with good momentum where I can show this liga that this Kielbasa Kock is ready to rock.

Anyway, that is all time I having today. Keep a looking out for me on the ice as I try to figure out new role on RW (or maybe you can convincing coach to put me in natural LW position) and continue to support Detroit because no one likes dick head teams like frog eating Montreal or incest bred St Louis. Until next time my friends and always remember this important thing, SKREEEE Falcons

Love,
Przemek aka Pussy Blaster aka Kielbasa Kock

664 words my dudes

***notorioustig*** · 03-21-2019, 04:06 PM

Someone with talent get this man a Kielbasa Kock sig STAT

***hhh81*** · 03-21-2019, 04:46 PM

Someone get this man a tutorial on paragraphs.

***notorioustig*** · 03-21-2019, 05:48 PM

03-21-2019, 04:46 PMhhh81 Wrote: Someone get this man a tutorial on paragraphs.

There were no paragraphs in Przemysław's childhood, only sadness and kielbasa to make him stronger

CKT · 03-22-2019, 01:30 PM

03-21-2019, 04:46 PMhhh81 Wrote: Someone get this man a tutorial on paragraphs.

pls dont be so insensitive to my falcons friends' lack of paragraphical upbringing pls buffalo bro, there was so much kielbasa there was no TIME for paragraphs

***hhh81*** · 03-22-2019, 04:25 PM

03-22-2019, 01:30 PMCKT Wrote:
03-21-2019, 04:46 PMhhh81 Wrote: Someone get this man a tutorial on paragraphs.

pls dont be so insensitive to my falcons friends' lack of paragraphical upbringing pls buffalo bro, there was so much kielbasa there was no TIME for paragraphs

Your friend seems to enjoy making and sharing kielbasa more than eating it, but I could be wrong. I respect him if he's an equal opportunity give and take sort of human.

Find your happiness!

CKT · 03-22-2019, 04:50 PM

03-22-2019, 04:25 PMhhh81 Wrote:
03-22-2019, 01:30 PMCKT Wrote: pls dont be so insensitive to my falcons friends' lack of paragraphical upbringing pls buffalo bro, there was so much kielbasa there was no TIME for paragraphs

Your friend seems to enjoy making and sharing kielbasa more than eating it, but I could be wrong. I respect him if he's an equal opportunity give and take sort of human.

Find your happiness!

everyone loves some thicc juicy sausage

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