The Last Will and Bustament
 
            THIS IS THE LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT of me, Kristof Kovacs of the great Czechoslovakian nation, in Halifax, Nova Scotia. He sucked so much and was a bust which then lead quickly to his sudden death.
 
1. REVOCATION
I HEREBY REVOKE all former wills, codicils and other testamentary dispositions made by me.
2. EXECUTORS
I NOMINATE, CONSTITUTE and APPOINT my Brother, Oliver Kovacs  (1) Estate Trustee, Executor and Trustee of this my Will so that in the event that my above-named Estate Trustee, Executor and Trustee shall have pre-deceased me or shall survive me but die before the trusts hereof shall have terminated or shall be unable or unwilling to act or to continue to act, I appoint, the Czech LR by committee. References to "my Trustee" in this my Will shall include each Estate Trustee, Executor and Trustee of my Will, my estate or any portion thereof who may be acting as such from time to time whether original or substituted and whether one or more.
3. PROPERTY TO TRUSTEE
I GIVE, DEVISE, AND BEQUEATH all of my property such as my hockey tape, sticks, and extra laces, of every nature and kind and wheresoever situate, including property over which I may have a general power of appointment, to my Trustee upon the following trusts, namely:
Debts, Expenses and Taxes
a.              To pay out of all of the debt I owe by bookee and the local Quickie for all the scratch tickets I gave an IOU for
b.              To pay out of my general estate all income taxes, estate, inheritance and succession duties or taxes
c.               To throw an awesome party with the remainder of my estate so the boys can snipe celly  in my honour.



 
 
Bust Certificate
 
Name: Kristof Kovacs
 
Team(s): Raiders & Rage
 
Age: 18
 
Height: 5’8”
 
Features:
Eye Colour: Dreamy
Hair Colour: wirey
Skin Colour: tank-top tanned
Body: decent
Face: not- appealing (a huge butter-face situation)







This Death Certificate is Hereby Certified and Drafted  by :   a “lawyer” from DeVry “university”
 
 
 
 
 
 
Last Words: Audio Recording
 
If you are listening to this then I probably died from a freak gasoline fight accident or murder… or literally anything else. So maybe I can now tell you guys things I’m too insecure and embarrassed to divulge in person because of my shitty emotional upbringing made me incapable of communicating effectively.
 
-       Zamboni’s are a fear of mine
-       I’ve never watched Slap Shot
-       Ketchup is gross
-       I hire someone to break in my shoes so I don’t get blisters from wearing new ones
-       I eat bananas from the center outwards
-       It was me who broke blue tooth speaker in the locker room but blamed the custodial staff
-       I bought one of those fancy Japanese toilets so I didn’t have to wipe ever again
 
There’s probably other things that I can’t think and, well... I never will!




words : 485

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#27 || Krištof Kovacs || C || S43 || Halifax Raiders|| CZE|| 264 TPE

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SMJHL Regular Season:
S42 | HAL | GP: 50 | G: 11 | A: 10 | P: 21| FOW: 611 (54.60%) | +/-: -10 | PIMs: 19 | PPP: 9 |

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Accomplisments

S42 - SMJHL: Drafted 7th OA, Halifax Raiders 
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I'll miss you most of all...


Tell me where you buried the gold.

Colorado Raptors Capitan S42-Until Forever!
Czechia Wants you! Ask about a transfer!!

S74 - Troy McClure IIII
Late To Draft - Signed by Regina Elk
Drafted 18th overall in SHL Draft to New England Wolfpack






S42-Troy McClure III- D-Retired
Undrafted Signing-S41
S43-S52 SHL Totals: 500 games played 32 goals 189 assists 891 hits 10227 minutes
S41-S42 SMJHL Totals: 100 games played 10 goals 52 assists 187 hits 1818 minutes
S41-S52 Czechia Totals: 124 games played 12 goals 42 assists 230 hits 2468 minutes




Awards
S41 WJC Gold Medal Champion Co-GM!!
S42 Quilha Agante Trophy Winner
S42 Ideen Fallah Trophy Winner
 S44 Champion Cup Champion - Winnipeg Jets
S53 Champion Cup Champion - Hamilton Steelhawks

wait, people dont eat from the center of the banana?

PROFILE || UPDATE || RAGE.  




Luke Thomason || LW || Manhattan Rage || 2143 Max TPE
Born: 1/10/98
Height: 6'0
Weight 185 Lbs
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Regular season
SMJHL/SHL Stats
S42 | Van | GP: 50| G: 4| A: 8|P: 12|+/-: -10|MP: 457|
S43 | Van | GP: 50| G: 16| A: 19|P: 35|+/-: 3|MP: 951|
S44 | Van | GP: 50| G: 22| A: 31|P: 53|+/-: 9|MP: 1033|
S45 | SFP | GP: 50| G: 18| A: 19|P: 37|+/-: -5|MP: 1041|
S46 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 19| A: 24|P: 43|+/-: -3|MP: 1156|
S47 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 16| A: 28|P: 44|+/-: -15|MP: 1184|
S48 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 16| A: 24|P: 40|+/-: -13|MP: 1137|
S49 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 21| A: 28|P: 49| +/-: 13|MP: 1099
S50 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 21| A: 23|P: 44| +/-: 10|MP: 1157
S51 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 17| A: 22|P: 39| +/-: 5|MP: 1232
S52 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 24| A: 29|P: 54| +/-: 17|MP: 1193
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Playoffs
S42 Playoffs | Van| GP: 11 | G: 1| A: 2 |P:3|+/-: +3| MP: 101
S43 Playoffs | Van| GP: 10 | G: 4| A: 1 |P:5|+/-: -3| MP: 206
S44 Playoffs | Van| GP: 14 | G: 7| A:6  |P:13|+/-:-1 | MP:228
S46 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 12 | G: 3 | A:2  |P:5|+/-:-14 | MP:289
S47 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 5 | G: 3 | A:4  |P:7|+/-:2 | MP:119
S49 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 11| G: 6| A: 11|P:16|+/-: 5| MP:248
S50 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 6| G: 5| A: 5|P:10|+/-: 7| MP:137
S51 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 12| G: 7| A: 9|P:16|+/-: 4| MP:293
S52 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 19| G: 9| A: 13|P:22|+/-: 0| MP:438

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Transactions/Awards
S43 Named Assistant Captain for VAN Whalers
Drafted 3rd OA by San Fransisco Pride
S43 4 Star Cup Champion  
S44 Zach Miller Award for Most Dedicated
S44 nominee for the Damien Littleton award for most dedicated
S45 WJC Gold Medalist
S45 SHL Rookie All-Star Team
S46 Named Captain for Czechoslovakia
S45 Winner of the Damien Littleton award for most dedicated
S46 Nominee for Damien Littleton award for most dedicated
S49 Bronze Medal for Czechia
S52 Nominee for Anton Razov Trophy
S52 SHL 3rd Team


Arnost Holub || Vancouver Whalers GM/ Manhattan Rage Co-GM
S44 | W:27 | L:18 | OTL: 5 | P:59 | 3rd in League 
S45 | W:29 | L:17 | OTL: 4 | P:62 | 4th in League 
S46 | W:23 | L:21 | OTL: 6 | P:52 | 8th in League 
S47 | W:30 | L:17 | OTL: 3 | P:63 | 3rd in League 
S48 | W:28 | L:16 | OTL: 6 | P:62 | 4th in League 
Total | W:137 | L: 89 | OTL: 24 

Manhattan Rage  
S49 | W:33 | L:15 | OTL: 2 | P:68 | 3rd in League  
S50 | W:26 | L:20 | OTL: 4 | P:56 | 8th in League  
S51 | W:26 | L:18 | OTL: 6 | P:56 | 5th in League 
S52 | W:28 | L:21 | OTL: 1 | P:57 | 6th in League 
Totals | W:113 | L:74 | OTL: 13 
S49 Lance Uppercut Award
S51 Lance Uppercut Award Nomination
S52 Lance Uppercut Award Nomination

Playoffs
Vancouver Whalers
S44 | W: 7 | L: 7 | CF Round Exit
S45 | W: 6 | L: 6 | CF Round Exit
S46 | W: 1 | L: 4 | 1st Round Exit
S47 | W: 6 | L: 4 | CF Round Exit
S48 | W: 12 | L: 7 | 4 Star Cup Champions
Total| W: 32 | L: 28 | 4 Star Cup Champions

Manhattan Rage
S49 | W: 6 | L: 5 | CF Round Exit
S50 | W: 2 | L: 4 | Wildcard Exit
S51 | W: 5 | L: 7 | CF Exit
S52 | W: 12 | L: 7 | Challenge Cup Champions
Total | W: 25 | L:23 | 1 Challenge Cup

S42 Raiders <3