For reasons that cannot be explained, cats can suddenly read at a twelfth-grade level. They can't talk and they can't write, but they can read silently and understand the text. Many cats love this new skill, because they now have something to do all day while they lay around the house; however, a few cats become depressed, because reading forces them to realize the limitations of their existence (not to mention the utter frustration of being unable to express themselves).

This being the case, do you think the average cat would enjoy Garfield, or would cats find this cartoon to be an insulting caricature?

Do you #BelieveinScootyRoberman?

I am of course talking about Scott Robertson. What are your thoughts on this fine young man and his progress as a legit pro in the SHL so far?

Would you go to a party headlined by DJ Flemmy Flem? I drop mad beats, yo.

What do you guys think about Tanner's performance this year? (RIP my fantasy team)

sigs by ToeDragon84

Recording Friday night. Anyone else got anything?

Element 43 is technetium, which probably isn't much cooler than molybdenum if at all.

My anniversary with my girlfriend is coming up. What separates an awesome anniversary present from an awesome birthday or Christmas present?

Either of you have tattoos? Once I have money, I have to get one as a promise to my girlfriend re: the cancer stuff. If you could get one giant tattoo (like across your entire back or something crazy) with absolutely no negative repercussions, what would it be and why?

How much did you like the intro to the Big Slappy Adventure? Any suggestions for the rest of the saga?

Are you believers in the 1-2-2 defensive strat? If you had to do lines for WKP and WIN, what would they look like, down to strats?

Laflamme really earning that contract eh?

How're the puppies?

Answered

Sigs by @FlappyGiraffe,  @Steelhead77,  @ToeDragon84, @slothfacekilla, @Wasty and other dude I need to find your name

Lil' Manius

Lil’ Manius | W | New Orleans| Retired 
Name: Lil' Manius
Height: 5’ 6”
Weight: 182
Number: 77
------------------------------------------------------------
Personal Awards and Records
S44 Challenge Cup Champion
S42 World Junior Championship Winner United States
S45 IIHF Silver Medal Winner United States
S48 IIHF Silver Medal Winner United States
S50 IIHF Gold Medal Winner United States
S51 IIHF Gold Medal Winner United States
S52 IIHF Bronze Medal Winner United States
S53 IIHF Gold Medal Winner United States
S48 1st All-Star Team
S52 Jeff Dar Trophy Nominee
S53 Jeff Dar Trophy Winner
S53 FHM MVP According to FHM or so they tell me
------------------------------------------------------------


Big Manius

Big Manius| D | Winnipeg | Retired
Name: Big Manius
Height: 6’ 9”
Weight: 265
Number: 7
------------------------------------------------------------
Personal Awards and Records
SHL Hall of Fame Player
Member of the Triple Gold Club
S37 Challenge Cup Champion
S25 Challenge Cup Champion
S42 IIHF Bronze Medal Winner Norway
S38 IIHF Silver Medal Winner Norway
S36 IIHF Silver Medal Winner Norway
S35 IIHF Gold Medal Winner Norway
S34 IIHF Bronze Medal Winner Norway
S33 IIHF Silver Medal Winner Norway
S31 IIHF Bronze Medal Winner Norway
S29 IIHF Silver Medal Winner Norway
S27 IIHF Top Defenseman
S33 2nd All-Star Team
S30 Turd Ferguson Award Winner
S30 League leader Fights Won
S26 Aidan Richen Trophy winner
S26 Scott Stevens Nominee
S26 2nd All-Star Team
S26 Tied for first in PP Goals
S23 Four Star Cup Champion
Falcons Modern Era: PIMS Leader - 96
Falcons Modern Era Leader: Power play Goals in a Season - 13
Falcons All Time Leaders: Defenseman Goals in a Season - 20
SMJHL S 22: Lead league in PIMs - 96
SMJHL S 23: Lead league in shot % - 22.73%
SMJHL S 22 Playoffs: Lead league in PIMs
SMJHL S 22 Playoffs:  Lead league in fights won
SMJHL S 23 Playoffs:  Lead league in fights won
------------------------------------------------------------

Going to do this tomorrow night. Any and all questions will be answered and appreciated. Thanks

Have I asked if you are watching the CWC yet? If you are, who did you like in Rd 1?

GoB's Writing Thread

How have you been handling the recent heat wave in the northeast? How much ched have you guys been dealing with the last week?

What percentage of your waking hours have you spent OUT of air conditioning in the last week?

Are you both wearing mesh shorts right now? What color crocs is Slappy wearing? My guess is blue, could also be pink.

Discuss and compare the seasons of Esa, Manius and McDoodle.

Discuss the season of Alex Mack and speculate as to what goes on at an Alex Mack pool party.

Which of your teams has a better chance to beat Calgary in a 7 game series and why is the correct answer, neither of you have a chance? o:-)

I can say with 100% certainty that you two sinners have been watching Women's Olympic Gymnastics, seen any good camel toe?

Slappy, explain to us why Bonk prefers his women to have small hands...

If either of you could be in the Summer Olympics what would be your sport? and are you upset that Teabagging is not an event?

Obviously if you were both Winter Olympians you'd be in the 2-man Luge because your used to this position... https://thesexycrimes.files.wordpress.com/2...omanluge1va.jpg

Did you miss me? :lol:

---> ParmBorg Highlights <---



Esa Parmborg || Center || Calgary Dragons || S47 || TPE: 2000+
Name: Esa Parmborg
Age: 18
Height: 7'0"
Weight: 350 lbs
Number: 77
Born: Hella, Iceland
-----------------------
Transactions:
Drafted #1 Overall - Halifax Raiders - S46 SMJHL
Auto Drafted GM - Calgary Dragons - S47 SHL
-----------------------
Awards & Achievements:
S50 Challenge Cup Champion - Calgary Dragons
-----------------------
SHL Statistics:
S50: GP:50 | G:9 | A:8 | P:17 | -3 | PIM:13 | H:34 | PP:0 | SOG:70
-----------------------
SMJHL Statistics:
S46: GP:50 | G:6 | A:9 | P:15 | -8 | PIM:20 | H:44 | PP:0 | SOG:76
S47: GP:50 | G:12 | A:19 | P:31 | 0 | PIM:10 | H:71 | PP:6 | SOG:111
S48: GP:50 | G:21 | A:27 | P:48 | +10 | PIM:20 | H:19 | PP:13 | SOG:147
S49: GP:50 | G:19 | A:29 | P:48 | +18 | PIM:26 | H:48 | PP:13 | SOG:116
TOT: GP:200 | G:58 | A:84 | P:142 | +20 | PIM:86 | H:182 | PP:32 | SOG:450



[pbl]Esa Anrikkanen || C / LW || Calgary Dragons || S18 || 2008TPE
Esa Anrikkanen || C / LW || Calgary Dragons || S18 || 2008TPE
Age: 40
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 255 lbs
Number: 10
Born: Helsinki, Finland
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Career Statistics:
S46: GP:50 | G:14 | A:10 | P:24 | -14 | PIM:21 | H:23 | PP:5 | SOG:126
S45: GP:50 | G:11 | A:13 | P:24 | -10 | PIM:10 | H:28 | PP:7 | SOG:162
S44: GP:50 | G:11 | A:10 | P:21 | -1 | PIM:10 | H:22 | PP:7 | SOG:115
S43: GP:50 | G:15 | A:17 | P:32 | -7 | PIM:2 | H:9 | PP:11 | SOG:137
S42: GP:50 | G:10 | A:20 | P:30 | 0 | PIM:0 | H:4 | PP:7 | SOG:128
S41: GP:50 | G:22 | A:16 | P:38 | +28 | PIM:7 | H:2 | PP:4 | SOG:123
S40: GP:50 | G:16 | A:12 | P:28 | -6 | PIM:18 | H:45 | PP:8 | SOG:118
S39: GP:50 | G:18 | A:14 | P:32 | +12 | PIM:0 | H:4 | PP:7 | SOG:187
S38: GP:50 | G:16 | A:11 | P:27 | -2 | PIM:4 | H:7 | PP:8 | SOG:143
S37: GP:50 | G:19 | A:22 | P:41 | +6 | PIM:4 | H:7 | PP:12 | SOG:224
S36: GP:50 | G:22 | A:21 | P:43 | +15 | PIM:4 | H:18 | PP:8 | SOG:201
S35: GP:50 | G:28 | A:26 | P:54 | +25 | PIM:0 | H:13 | PP:14 | SOG:205
S34: GP:50 | G:24 | A:22 | P:46 | +6 | PIM:52 | H:128 | PP:13 | SOG:208
S33: GP:50 | G:21 | A:16 | P:37 | -2 | PIM:28 | H:78 | PP:13 | SOG:207
S32: GP:50 | G:18 | A:16 | P:34 | -10 | PIM:27 | H:15 | PP:9 | SOG:164
S31: GP:50 | G:20 | A:25 | P:45 | +11 | PIM:48 | H:92 | PP:9 | SOG:198
S30: GP:50 | G:22 | A:33 | P:55 | +17 | PIM:64 | H:134 | PP:18 | SOG:232
S29: GP:50 | G:21 | A:32 | P:53 | +14 | PIM:75 | H:212 | PP:15 | SOG:239
S28: GP:50 | G:23 | A:25 | P:48 | +25 | PIM:60 | H:179 | PP:7 | SOG:205
S27: GP:50 | G:19 | A:18 | P:37 | +1 | PIM:68 | H:94 | PP:8 | SOG:135
S26: GP:50 | G:21 | A:21 | P:42 | +9 | PIM:54 | H:82 | PP:15 | SOG:200
S25: GP:50 | G:18 | A:27 | P:45 | +27 | PIM:42 | H:139 | PP:6 | SOG:154
S24: GP:52 | G:16 | A:18 | P:34 | -13 | PIM:48 | H:156 | PP:16 | SOG:153
S23: GP:52 | G:19 | A:30 | P:49 | +19 | PIM:104 | H:193 | PP:6 | SOG:162
S22: GP:52 | G:17 | A:25 | P:42 | -9 | PIM:26 | H:116 | PP:18 | SOG:156
S21: GP:52 | G:19 | A:22 | P:41 | +5| PIM:14 | H:51 | PP:12 | SOG:168
S20: GP:50 | G:17 | A:16 | P:33 | +10 | PIM:30 | H:71 | PP:8 | SOG:155
S19: GP:50 | G:10 | A:3 | P:13 | +10 | PIM:18 | H:88 | PP:1 | SOG:68
S18: GP:50 | G:7 | A:8 | P:15 | +20 | PIM:24 | H:44 | PP:4 | SOG:73
------------------------------------------------
Totals: GP:1358 | G:514 | A:549 | P:1063 | +186| PIM:868 | H:2054 | PP:277| SOG:4750
------------------------------------------------------------
SHL Playoff Statistics:
------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions:
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards & Accomplishments:
------------------------------------------------------------
Lost my sig, Work in progress.....

#1 All-Time SHL Goal & Point Scorer 
- First 2,000 TPE Player in SHL History - 
- First 400 Goal Scorer in SHL History -
- Only 500 Goal Scorer in SHL History -
- First GM to Win 5 & 6 Challenge Cups -
Esa Anrikkanen Award - SMJHL ROY - Est. S34
Vidrik Onoprienko Award Winner - S45



Esa Anrikkanen || HOF GM || Calgary Dragons || S24 || Cups: 6
----------------------------------------
Seasons: 27
Playoffs: 25
Challenge Cup Championships: 5 (S27, S29, S32, S40, S42, S50)
Cole Reinhart Trophy: 8 (S27, S29, S32, S33, S38, S40, S42, S47, S50)
President's Trophy: 3 (S30, S35, S36, S49)
Division Titles: 6 (S30, S31, S33, S35, S36, S39, S49)
Lance Uppercut Award: S36
Joe McKeil Award: S26
Joe McKeil Award: S30
Joe McKeil Award: S33
Joe McKeil Award: S39
1st GM to Win 5 & 6 Challenge Cups!
----------------------------------------
Reg.Season Record: 774 - 448 - 113 (+543)
S50: 27 W - 20 L - 3 OTL  (+7)
S49: 34 W - 13 L - 3 OTL  (+31)
S48: 24 W - 19 L - 7 OTL (+0)
S47: 28 W - 16 L - 6 OTL (+12)
S46: 24 W - 22 L - 5 OTL (-14)
S45: 22 W - 26 L - 2 OTL (-13)
S44: 28 W - 18 L - 4 OTL (+23)
S43: 27 W - 21 L - 2 OTL (+17)
S42: 29 W - 15 L - 6 OTL (+24)
S41: 29 W - 19 L - 2 OTL (+24)
S40: 31 W - 13 L - 6 OTL (+29)
S39: 33 W - 14 L - 3 OTL (+30)
S38: 25 W - 21 L - 4 OTL (+9)
S37: 25 W - 19 L - 6 OTL (+18)
S36: 31 W - 15 L - 4 OTL (+43)
S35: 36 W - 12 L - 2 OTL (+47)
S34: 26 W - 19 L - 5 OTL (+14)
S33: 30 W - 14 L - 6 OTL (+34)
S32: 27 W - 18 L - 5 OTL (+4)
S31: 32 W - 16 L - 2 OTL (+30)
S30: 35 W - 13 L - 2 OTL  (+55)
S29: 29 W - 15 L - 6 OTL  (+44)
S28: 29 W - 15 L - 6 OTL  (+28)
S27: 27 W - 18 L - 5 OTL (+13)
S26: 31 W - 15 L - 4 OTL  (+16)
S25: 29 W - 19 L - 2 OTL  (+14)
S24: 26 W - 20 L - 6 OTL  (-7)
-----------------SMJHL--------------------
Detroit Falcons GM - S20-S23
Seasons: 4
Four Star Cup Championships: 1 (S23)
President's Trophy: 3 (S21, S22, S23)
Eastern Conference Title: 3 (S21, S22, S23)
Division Title: 3 (S21, S22, S23)
GM of The Year: S23
more to follow.....

Part 2 reaction/Part 3 Anticipation?

I made a change to my fantasy line-up. How did Laflamme not perform to expectations?

Because <a href='index.php?showuser=1583' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-59'>GCool</a> hasn't gotten it yet, element 44 is Ruthenium, which is not something I have overt experience with, but it's similar to platinum.

Should the SMJHL or SHL expand by S35? Quick rundown of team locations and names you'd like to see come to fruition?

Quinn officially retired, can I get a eulogy from you two?

Is Scott Robertson for real underrated? How long will that last?

Thoughts on the olympics and the crazy green poop smelling pool everyone had to swim in?

sigs by ToeDragon84

You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. When you ask how this process works, the wizard points to a random person on the street. You look at this random stranger. The wizard says, "I will now make them a dollar more attractive." He waves his magic wand. Ostensibly, this person does not change at all; as far as you can tell, nothing is different. But--somehow--this person is suddenly a little more appealing. The tangible difference is invisible to the naked eye, but you can't deny that this person is vaguely sexier. This wizard has a weird rule, though--you can only pay him once. You can't keep giving him money until you're satisfied. You can only pay him one lump sum up front.

How much cash do you give the wizard?

Originally posted by mpc@Aug 12 2016, 07:17 PM
Part 2 reaction/Part 3 Anticipation?

I made a change to my fantasy line-up. How did Laflamme not perform to expectations?

Because <a href='index.php?showuser=1583' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-59'>GCool</a> hasn't gotten it yet, element 44 is Ruthenium, which is not something I have overt experience with, but it's similar to platinum.

Should the SMJHL or SHL expand by S35? Quick rundown of team locations and names you'd like to see come to fruition?

Quinn officially retired, can I get a eulogy from you two?

I didn't mention Ru because it's not that interesting. Kiss ass )

Originally posted by GCool@Aug 12 2016, 09:06 PM


I didn't mention Ru because it's not that interesting. Kiss ass )

:-x