Quote:3. Written, 2 TPE (100 words min.)
By now, you're probably familiar with the attributes on FHM, and you likely have some sense of what type of build you're going to be aiming for with your player. What one attribute are you going to focus on most? Of all the attributes in the game, what is your player going to strive to be the absolute best at? Why are you picking that specific attribute above all others?

Blocking shots. I hope to be the career leader of blocked shots, Dan Girardi style. I feel like it's such a weird part of hockey that there are dudes in the league who dive in front of shits and get clunked upside the fucking dome for the team, when there's a dude in like a bulletproof vest with a mask *right fucking there* who's entire job is doing that. It's so unnecessary and badass, I love it. Nothing gets me hornier than a good, fat, blocked shot. You remember the one where Danny G got the puck stuck under his visor and looked like a pirate? If that doesn't happen to me then I fucking quit the sim, I quit the league, I quit everything.

Quote:5. Written, 2 TPE (100 words min.)
Which player from the Rage or the Pride would you bet on to win a regular season individual award in a future season? What player and what award? What makes you think they'll live up to their potential and take home the hardware?

Dilker, ol' Daftraincloud. I fully expect him to get a dedicated member award sometime in the future, he's doing a ton of work in terms of media development and that's such an underrated part of the league. His videos for the awards, the live commentary for the J's game 7 and stuff. He's gonna keep pushing the envelope and doing great things. It's a ton of effort and I know he worries that it won't pay off, but it absolutely does, and I was low key hopeful Darnell's last season in the J he would win an award so I'd get to have a cool video by Dilk to remember the season by. Oh well.

Quote:6. Written, 2 TPE (100 words min.)
The SHL is taking a stand and trying to do its part in reducing its carbon footprint. One of the proposed ideas is to eliminate back and forth air travel during the Challenge Cup and Four Star Cup finals and instead hold all 4-7 games in one neutral, rotating location a la the Super Bowl. Are you FOR or AGAINST this idea? Why?

That's a tough one. In theory I'm for it, right? Gotta protect the environment. But having the finals spread out the way they are allows for home crowds to really get in on the action, and it's a special part of sport. Winning it in a game 7 on home ice? There can't possibly be a better feeling in the whole world, or a better moment than lifting the cup in all of sports. Holding the events in a neutral location may also have unforeseen drawbacks as well, causing fans to travel to the neutral location just the same way the two teams already travel? Perhaps. Perhaps a study should be done to draw a conclusion as to just how much of an offset it would be to reduce player and team travel compared to the increased travel to a neutral venue.

Quote:4. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min.)
The Most Generic Prompt of All Time - what is your player looking forward to in the offseason? What are they planning on doing? Training? Relaxing? Testing free agency? Whatever it is, let us know!

Getting back to Anchorage to see how player development is coming along, going back home to visit family, but most of all training. Working on everything. Skating. The transition to a new rule set in the league will be interesting, and while everything is mostly the same there will be enough of a change to shake everything up and really change the dynamic of the league. Getting back to NOLA early will be crucial, learning new lines, new routines, new set pieces with new players. Darnell has also stepped into something of a player/coaching role in NOLA at least for the transition phase into the new rulebook, as he's familiar with it from his time playing in college. This is a big offseason for Darnell, and he just hopes he can live up to the expectations that have been put upon him. But with good senior coaching and management, he should be able to thrive even in the chaos of a refreshed league.

Quote:1. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min.)
This reality is just one of infinite realities existing alongside this one in parallel. Take us over to one of those realities in which everything is the same but these S52 playoffs have unfolded differently. What happened in that reality's playoffs and who's in the Challenge Cup over there?

Picture this. Toronto. Tankronto. In the finals. An average of 600 tpe across their entire team. Multiple 155 IAs on the final roster. Game 5, winning it all away. The league? It inverts upon itself, exploding back outwards in a heated rage. Collectively we all dig a trench and get to slaughtering, laying the corpse of the discarded STHS into it. We chop it up with our shovels and mattocks, douse it in gasoline and bury it, but not before desecrating its final resting place by pissing all over its remains. It matters not, though, as ML has somehow become a Joker-like figure in the league, his impeccable form and strategy of tank it until you make it actually mattering. His chaotic energy unmatched, he single-handedly wills Toronto into a three-peat in the new FHM. As the chaos and dust of the league settles and the formula becomes more understood.... ML still reigns supreme, the most successful GM in the history of the league. None may ever touch his legacy.

Quote:14. Written, up to 5 TPE Pick up to 5 Challenge Cup related topics to write about! Each topic is worth 1 TPE. Each answer must be 50+ words to qualify.
1. Head GMs JayWhy and Grapehead have been GMing for a while, whereas Co GMs Luketd and DaftRaincloud are newer to management - which team's front office staff (including coaches) do you think will provide a strategic edge (lol as if such a thing exists in STHS) in this series?
2. Manhattan has been rocking a pretty evenly-distributed ice time for forwards (35-33-32) whereas San Francisco is going a bit more top-heavy (40-40-15). Which approach do you think is better for a fierce Challenge Cup series?
3. The Rage and the Pride have, in my opinion at least, two of the best logos in the entire SHL. Which team's logo do you like more and why?
4. What is your favorite player name on either of these two teams and why? (not favorite player/user, just focusing on their player name)
5. Would you rather: (a) a chainsaw lesson with JayWhy, (b) a private Gritty meet-and-greet for you and Luke, © an all-you-can-eat grape buffet experience with Grapehead, or (d) an hour session where DaftRaincloud shows you everything from his internet history?

1. Neither. I don't know. Both? Do tactics even matter in STHS? I guess I'm gonna say Pride because Daft is my boy, but I don't think anything matters. Welcome to nihilism boys, sponsored by STHS. Pride managed to beat the Specters, who I think are a good team that's developed well and has been managed very well. So maybe there is something to it.

2. I think Manhattan's style will be better suited for a longer series. Spreading ice time more evenly can allow for some more favorable matchups, especially towards the bottom. Remains to be seen whether or not it'll come to matter in this series. But here's to hoping STHS is better than a coin-flip simulator. I mean, at least that would explain Toronto.

3. Pride because it's purple, and so is NOLA's, so that's really cool. Also I'm a leo, so I like lions. Not sure how much any of that zodiac shit matters, but I've got a cool one (again, a fuckin lion) so I bring it up every now and again. Imagine being a fucking Taurus and liking the rage because they're a bull? Don't think so. Bulls get eaten by lions, seen it happen. Anyway, Pride in 6 because pretty purple lions, ferda.

4. Jonas Larsen because he's the only one I know off the top of my head. He played with me in Anchorage and I've been keeping tabs on him ever since. He seems like a good enough dude. Maybe a little too sweaty. Kinda baby faced, sure, but I remember showering with him in ANC and the guy was packing a fucking truncheon in his pants. I don't know how he skates as fast as he does with that fuckin THANG on him at all times.

5. D. Gimmie that hour session with Daft because you know man's got some good stuff in that history. Hopefully it was a slow day in the realm, otherwise some really weird shit might be in there though. Like slimmy snails or whatever weird shit he was into that one day. Otherwise I think it's just gonna be cute, bottom-heavy bitches and lots of only fans. I heard that guy spends like $600 a month on onlyfans accounts.