fem boy hooters (is it femboy?)


First of all Jimmy Slothface is a kind soul so he isn't going to be going out on the ice with weapons and trying to kill all of the opposing players, that just isn't in his soul.  First thing's first he is probably going to dress up in full goalie gear because he does not trust the opposing players in the SHL one bit in this purge scenario.  Jimmy will be able to withstand (within reason) attacks by opposing players and still be able to try to play hockey to the best of his abilities.  I imagine that most of the game will devolve into mayhem with this purge no rules situation, so Jimmy would have to just move slowly and calmly in his new goalie gear to try and navigate it all.  He could probably employ some non-lethal weapons into his arsenal as well, maybe some sort of trip wire guns that would tie  up opposing players' legs.  That way he could get away from attackers as well.


Since we are a simulation hockey league and not a play in real life hockey league I have to imagine the celebrities that the SHL would attract would largely be streamers from Twitch and whatnot.  Sadly I do not know a ton of streamers and I'm going to have to pull up Twitch here.  Alright immediately I was greeted with a hot tub boob streamer Amouranth on the front page and I feel like that sort of vibe would gel with Tampa Bay.  They are a younger crowd and by the beach so I think that would fit with her being a Tampa fan.  I noticed Dr Lupo on my follow bar and I know that he runs a lot of charity streams so I think he would just be a fan of the SHL overall with our charity efforts in the past.  Overall I think streamers would be the megafans.


I know hotdog had an apology to Julio for this prompt but I am going to have to go with hotdog as another player I would eat (yes I am going with his username and not his actual player name but I do not care).  It would definitely be tempting to eat Julio because there are just so many different cuts and ways that he could be cooked to be eaten.  Plus there is a lot of him to go around so you theoretically would not need to murder multiple players in this situation.  But for some reason a nice hotdog from a stadium sounds really good right now.  I would slather it in ketchup and relish and then go to town, adding nutrition to my player so that he can withstand the full SHL season.


First of all I think I need to do the first eliminated people.  First I think the Winnipeg Aurora would go, what can lights really do to opponents in a fight?  I guess they could blind the other side but then they couldn't really do anything else.  The Argonauts probably are out near the front too since they are just boats.  I know they have painted eyes on them but I do not think that means they are alive.  So they would just sit there.  The North Stars are another dud that couldn't really do much in a fight. Maybe they could supernova and explode the other side but then they are dead too.  The Syndicate would probably be toast since I do not see a weapon in their logo (they could really use a gun).  The Monarchs could use their scepter but that probably would only go so far against the other teams.  The Renegades are tricky since they imply weapons somewhere, but I think eventually they would lose.  The barracuda are probably too small and would rely on water too much.  There are a lot of fierce animals in the SHL logos but I have to say that the dragon probably is going to come out on top here.


Another championship week post and another time for me to say the same thing I always do about my IIHF predictions since there isn't much parity in the league these days (at least in IIHF there is a tiny bit more I guess). Canada are the odds on favorites to win it as always. They have a great player pool to draw from and they seem to have good management who has access to the auto strategy google sheet that seems to be out there. I have to think that they are going to continue their run of gold medals. Then Great Britain is probably the next favorite after nabbing the silver medal a few seasons in a row. We still have a strong lineup with a lot of depth especially with some younger players coming into their primes. I also have to imagine OrbitingDeath's player, who had an excellent season for Los Angeles in the SHL, is looking at being one of the top scorers for the IIHF tournament. He should lead the way for Great Britain. After that, I imagine the US will hang around near the top despite them always seeming to choke when it comes to the medal rounds. After that I hope everyone just has fun.