Honestly, most of these pills kind of suck. I mean, the blue pill makes it effectively impossible to play the game, the green pill... I'm a defensive defenseman, so that's a no go, I've got no allergies so no need for the orange pill, being famous sucks, the brown pill sounds like it'd be great for a prank, I have no interest in being the PT director, even though I wouldn't mind erasing him from existence. I almost picked purple, because I like grape flavored stuff, but, thinking about it, the red would probably be best. Shitting my pants on the ice sounds like the most alpha move possible, plus it gives me a projectile weapon to use if a fight breaks out. Also, I guess the speed is kind of nice. I mean, as I said, I'm a defensive defenseman, so to me, more speed basically equals harder hits - plus it would also allow me to more effectively block shots or intercept passes. Would also be quite nice off the ice in case I'm ever late to a game, I'm sure I can get used to wearing adult diapers.