In an attempt to bridge the gap after the recent lapse in funding Teddy Murphy first went to the single greatest penny pincher he knows.  His penny pinching grandmother from the Greatest Generation.  Initially she came up with the idea of switching to cheaper ingredients with potentially more filler in concessions at games, but that idea was immediately shot down by the Committee for the Preservation of Fake Hockey.  They weren't in favor of the longer term aspect of slowly recouping costs as games are played.  So Murphy went back to the drawing board and sought out the advice of Theranos founder Elizabeth Holmes.  Her ability to get rich people to throw money at literally nothing is well documented and just the skill the league needs to stay in business.  Holmes' suggestion was to just give her some seed money and she will set up meetings with venture capitalist firms from prison and find someone willing to invest in the future of fake hockey.  The committee loved the idea and sent over the league's remaining money for Holmes to get the meetings happening.  We look forward to the influx of cash over the next few days.