"All SHL games now must start at noon to correspond with our new marketing campaign to get more 60+ fans into the game and league."

"I don't know Mark, I don't think we can do intermission entertainment for 60+. They hate everything, don't they?"

"Shouldn't be too hard, just entertain them like they did back when they were younger."

"We can allow racism and sexism at the arena. Jesus fuck Mark."

"No you dumb fuck, not that stuff. Bring back the in arena organ. Get someone that can play all the hits in the 70s. Instead of the hotdog cannon, it's a brick of bran cannon. No t-shirt tosses, it's blanket tosses. The best part about the blanket toss, it still works for kids. Those little shits love blankets. Think with your head."

"Oh I get it. Instead of beer, we sell milk in a glass bottle. Allow the upper bowl to smoke in the arena.'

"Now we're getting somewhere!"