Creative Prompt

Right off the bat, no damn kids allowed in the arena. The youth today have no manners at all. This will be easy enough to enact. Because we are pandering to the elderly demographic, we are going to need to jack up the arena audio even louder. Anyone under the age of 60 is going to have their brains explode from the impact of sound coming their way. Second, free Metamucil to stir into your beer. Old people have trouble staying regular and want to get loaded at the game. Two birds, one stone. Next, we are going to need to make some adjustments to the arena itself. The elderly aren’t exactly known for their eagle eyes. To address this, the regular glass is going to be replaced with prescription strength eyeglass glass. Now everyone will be able to tell what the heck is going on on the ice. Finally, the young kids skate too fast. It is now a penalty to skate more than 15 miles per hour. Referees will be armed with radar guns to enforce this new rule.
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