According to my Christian family, as I am an Atheist, so I don’t believe in the birth of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I will be spending my Christmas morning alone in a dark room. Instead of presents I will bath myself in the blood of the unborn and listen to liberal propaganda pod casts while in the tub. The events of the day will include taking down neighbors Christmas decorations “for their own good.” Good news, for supper I should be having a fresh baby (bet you can’t eat just one), and we will wash it all down with a fresh glass of beer. Which is an acceptable drink, especially when I have too much and cause a scene.

But in actuality I will be enjoying sometime with my family and friends. Presents in the morning, going around and touring the neighborhoods looking at Christmas lights, and enjoying a wonderful ham and turkey supper with my parents and siblings. Probably have a few too many beers though.