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S76 PT #5: Push it to the limit
Due: Sunday, May 12th @ 11:59 PM PST
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Runningman434Registered Senior Member
Written Option 1: Despite high speeds, countless hits and blocked shots somehow no SHL player has missed a game to injury in who knows how long. How does the league do it? Are players pumped up with so many drugs and steroids that nothing can hurt them? Better doctors than money can buy to operate anyone during intermission? Clones? Is it all just a simulation?
It's obviously a conspiracy by big SHL to keep their investors and the sports betting community happy. If the stars get injured think of all the revenue lost. The easy solution is to use robots. The best SHL scientists have perfected the synthetic humanoid (suck it Boston Dynamics) and by running a battery of tests and scans on every SHL player, can tune every bots servos, sensors, and actuators to replicate that player's physical demeanor perfectly. Furthermore, they can map a players brain and download it into the robots processors a la Elon's Nueralink and voila. A perfect replica of every SHL player that cannot be injured. This also has the added benefit of allowing every SHL player (the real one, not the robo version) to fil bonus promos and sign merch while their forged counterpart is busy on the rink. Nothing like the wonders of technology to make the SHL the most profitable league out there. It's just that easy y'all : Drafted 16th Overall by New England
| 66 GP | 4 G | 14 A | 18 P | +1 | 92 SB | 156 H | 68 TA
| 6 GP | 0 G | 1 A | 1 P | +1 | 17 SB | 8 H | 6 TA |
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