My player Johnny FourStar absolutely hates getting sent to the penalty box! In no other context is it okay to put someone in a box. It's inhumane, disrespectful, and dangerous! What if everyone in the arena forgets I'm in the box? Will I have to sleep in that tiny area until someone finally notices? What about if I have to go to the bathroom? Do I just find a corner? And what if I need a snack? I don't see many penalty boxes with their own Quiznos. We shouldn't put players into boxes. And that's why I am so angry! Did I throw an elbow? Probably. But why don't you send me to a nice relaxing spa, a place that will heal my inner child who threw that elbow? The penalty box should be a place for rehabilitation, not punishment. I think that this league as a whole will do much better if we address the root cause of penalties, rather than just throwing someone in a box. It's barbaric.

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