Option 1

As the newest chancellor of rule making in the SHL I would enact the Bald (or balding) call. If a player's helmet is dislodged during play and it is realized or discovered that said player is bald (or balding), play will be stopped immediately, regardless or which team currently has possession, or if the game is currently active, this means the penalty can be assessed during the pre-game warm up, during TV time-outs, intermissions, and even post game. The referee gestures the penalty by rubbing the top of their head in a smooth clockwise motion to implicate that the top of their head is smooth as a baby's bottom. The penalized player will be assessed a double minor penalty, one for attempting to hide their baldness, and the second for losing their helmet and exposing everyone else to their baldness. The player will be required to wear a toupee immediately before putting their helmet back on before serving the penalty in the hallway leading to the dressing rooms. The penalty shouldn't be called too often, but you would be surprised how the bald hide amongst the rest of us. We will only know once their helmets are off, god help us all. (This rule will most likely apply to fans of a certain team of Quebecois affiliation but reside in neighboring provinces).

227 words.