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ValorX77 · 08-25-2021, 07:00 PM

HanTheMan_ · 08-25-2021, 07:07 PM

*Zerg* · 08-25-2021, 07:16 PM

I have never played a Sims game in my life. Can I get a PT pass for this?

Just kidding. I still have not played the Sims, but I'll give it my best shot anyway.

Nystrom probably starts his day by putting yesterday's garbage bag into the sink dispose-all, turning it on, then enjoying the smell of destroyed machinery and smoke. His house then catches fire, so he grabs his hockey equipment and heads to the rink for someone else to deal with that issue. He'll flirt with whoever passes by, say hello to the man who's been stuck in the pool for half a decade ever since some psychopath removed the ladder. At the rink, he spam-flirts the zamboni girl, then probably makes a baby in the bathroom or something, I don't know how flirting works in this game. Either way, practice, spam shots at the net, pick a fight with a child on the way home, feed the man stuck in the pool, remember his house burned down this morning, so he then turns around to go crash with the zamboni girl? Can you do that in the Sims? I don't know, point is, you're not playing Crusader Kings II the Sims correctly if you're not a complete psychopath.
[176 words in the paragraph that matters]

r0tzbua · 08-25-2021, 07:29 PM

So Finn is a Sim now. Wow, I never thought it would come to this but here we go. In the rare case that Finn actually wakes up and has not died from a case of removing the pool ladder that his gruesome god always likes to play he gets up and hopefully does his toilet stuff. God often forgets to send Finn on the toilet before bed and since god also forgets to send him to bed as usual he probably just fell asleep out of pure exhaustion. God likes to watch Netflix while playing Sims. On this fine off-day after he visited the toilet Finn can finally take a shower after 7 days of the player forgetting to do that and flies already circling around him. He then gets some breakfast which consists of ... well spoiled milk since there was no shopping and the player spent all the money on that fancy new couch no one ever uses. After that it's time for some training by doing situps in the garden because which professional hockey player would need training equipment. I start to feel like whoever is playing this has no clue how the Sims actually works and just plays it to build his dreamhouse.

*Jayba1t* · 08-25-2021, 07:58 PM

As I wake up at 5am in the morning for my regular trainings, I realize its an off day. A happy vibe flows through my mind and I head back into bed, where I will sleep a few more hours till its like 12. After I lazily get out of bed, it's off day so time to binge on the junkie food. Pizza, chicken wings and all the unhealthy food in the world, I eat immediately for lunch. Then, I cuddle with my doggo and watch the latest shows available on television for a few hours. Some more off day food for dinner, then I head out to with some friends for a night-out and eat more junk food. I now go back home around night, and get ready to go to sleep. Tomorrow is game day, so I am sorta screwed with how much unhealthy food I ate. But hey, tomorrow's another day. You enjoy each day by itself.

Vikian · 08-25-2021, 08:15 PM

ISFL Affiliate

CheerfulBender20 · 08-25-2021, 08:18 PM

Let me tell you about a doozy of a science fiction novella - Harlan Ellison’s I have No Mouth, and I Must Scream. Winning the Hugo award in 1968, Ellison’s novella tells the tale of a malevolent artificial intelligence that mercilessly fucks with the last five humans in existence.

Named AM, an abbreviation for Allied Mastercomputer, the intelligence hates its human charges so much that it tortures them in disturbingly creative ways, such as: giving them cans of food with no means of opening said cans; granting them immortality to ensure an eternity of suffering; altering their perception of time to prolong their misery.

Why am I telling you this? You see, dear reader, I hate the sims. Every time I tried to play the sims, my avatar pissed himself and then refused to do anything. With my sim thwarting my ability to play the game properly, I became something akin to A.M: removing the pool ladder to the swimming pool, trapping my sim in the drink; making my sim open a cursed genie lamp which burned down his house; deleting the doors to my sim’s house, trapping him inside.

So, what does my sim’s day look like, you ask? Suffice to say, it wouldn’t be the typical hockey fare of going to practice, crushing beers with teammates, or going to an ownership mandated media day. Nor would it be enjoying an off day of light exercise capped off with a drink and a movie. It’s all trap swimming pools and wish-master style genies for this poor bastard.

*Keven* · 08-25-2021, 10:49 PM

As a sim character, Kev Kevens would start every day by walking around the SHL neighbourhood to visit everyone he knows. Since the distance between team cities no longer matters, Kev can start his route by complaining to Fletcher and Coquerelle about shootout positions for the Citadelles, and then immediately afterwards, visit Narboza Manyhands to inquire about the latest advancements in neural upgrade technology. After visiting everyone and increasing his social points for the day, Kevens will start working on strength training. Despite being in a different game and universe, maintaining optimal levels of fitness is important in the life of any hockey player. Even if hockey arenas aren't a feature in the sims, this training can be used towards a career in professional weightlifting and bodybuilding. Overall, a typical day in the sims for Kev isn't very eventful beyond those few activities. There are always plenty of people to talk to, and training can easily take up the remaining time in the game's shortened days.

*lmao* · 08-25-2021, 10:53 PM

PBE Affiliate

(username on PBE is twix)

*NorwegianDemon* · 08-25-2021, 10:54 PM

I wake up in the morning at 8 a.m., it’s a game day and the game is scheduled for 7 p.m. I quickly eat breakfast, which consists of two eggs and a bowl of cereal, and I leave home at 8:30 a.m. I make it to the arena where our morning skate is supposed to take place at 9:30 a.m. After the morning, I got back home where I spend 15 minutes on a stationary bike to get my legs moving. I eat a steak for lunch with a lot of green vegetables, then I seat in front of the TV to listen to a TV show. Around 2:30 p.m., I go back to my room to nap, those usually last from 30 minutes to an hour and 30 minutes, depending on how I’m feeling that day. Finally, I eat a bowl of pasta for dinner before leaving for the arena. I usually come back home around 11 p.m. and I relax by reading a book before going to bed.

170 words

Kyamprac · 08-25-2021, 11:29 PM

5ympathies · 08-26-2021, 01:16 AM

If I was in the Sims, an interesting Franchise that I personally am not interested in, but oh well, I would just gamble all my money repeatedly at the casino until I was a millionaire. Any time I lost my money I would just quit and restart and go again. After winning a million dollars I would purchase a business and grow it to be successful without needing my attention. I would then hire someone to manage it and only then after gaining a strong income source would I focus on hockey. My though process for this is maybe I'm just not good enough to make it as a player and I need another career to fall back on. Perhaps I get injured and can't play, or perhaps I just don't like the game, or the locker rooms, or anything involved and want out. This way I am still set for life and don't have to depend on any hockey contracts. Foolproof.

Thanks to JSS for the signature

roastpuff · 08-26-2021, 01:43 AM

If Magnus Liljestrom was a sim he would be one of those sims that would end up trapped in a forever never ending maze, or maybe tortured by the game player and made to do a bunch of things that would count as unsavory or cruel. Maybe he would have been forced to do exercise non-stop until he gained more skills/strength or however it works in the sims, and fed food that didn't really taste good but was nutritious. I am not sure as I never really liked the Sims nor played much of it. This PT needs me to try and imagine things that I never really see before. Maybe this Sims game would give him more luck than FHM will, as the sim engine that the SHL uses has been notoriously cruel to my player. Maybe in the Sims world Magnus Liljestrom would actually be successful, famous and loved by many instead of being mediocre.

*kentakira* · 08-26-2021, 01:53 AM

ok game day right? it's kinda hard for me, because of time different here, same as when i try to watch NFL. ok so usually because of work i am awake at 8 but sometimes. i wake up, do not forget to drink water in the morning, then drink vitamin for sure because of covid right? then when i have the time i usually cook for myself. if the game day is in the weekend, usually i do some job first, updating for SHL and PBE, or making dotts for ISFL. Then when i still have time i try to watch the game live, but if not then i watch the replay of course, always want to know what my player do for the team right? ok but if for the weekdays, usually i have meeting, so if i have the chance why not watching live stream while meeting right? but if the game is early in the morning for me, usually i just watch the replay after i done my update for my player. Or maybe i just have fun making sig or completing my card orders, been a lot lately but really having fun making it, cause i can earn so much for it, thanks for everyone who already order, if other want to order you can chat me

Muerto · 08-26-2021, 02:08 AM

SIM Grogu starts off his day by going for a swim in the pool. He just goes up and down up and down up and down the lanes. When he gets out he immediately puts on a tuxedo. While he is still wet - doesn't even dry off. Then he walks to the fence and starts flirting with the neighbor's wife. She's having none of it though and just keeps getting angry. Sadface broken heart emoji. At this point I have to step in and make him go to the kitchen and eat some food from the fridge. He seems to like it, Green bars going up. Now it's already noon and he's missed the bus for his job so he decides to play some music. He dances by himself for a while but gets bored quickly and goes into the backyard. Oooh look he's doing some gardening. Unusual but hey, the rest of him is green, I guess his thumb is, too! Uh oh here comes the nosy neighbor couple from down the block wandering into his back yard. They always want to talk about theater. All SIM Grogu cares about is music and food, so he gets angry. Black scribbles above his head now! Stupid neighbors! He goes into the house to get away but they follow him. Ah well now they want to listen to music, too, so they have a dance party. Now SG is hungry again so he starts cooking on the stove. Not sure what he's making, maybe a stirfry or something? Finally the neighbors leave. SG goes and plays chess by himself. Until he passes out. Quite the non-productive day for ol' SIM Grogu.

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