Login

Skeleton Party · 12-20-2020, 06:27 PM

If a battle royale were to occur in the Manhattan Rage locker room, they sure as shit would regret drafting [Name Redacted]. As a junior, [Name Redacted] constantly asked to have his aggression turned up all the way as he wanted an even higher body count. Multiple times his coaches had to confiscate weapons that he had hidden under his pads as he made his way out of the tunnel and onto the ice for a game. He literally had to change his name because he was “killing tens of thousands aof [sic] people.” You don’t just drop someone with that kind of body count into a locker room battle royale. On top of that, by virtue of being a goalie, he gets a de facto armor advantage over everyone else, plus a bunch of extra places to hide extra knives, guns, and grenades. Mark my words, [Name Redacted] will be eating so much chicken dinner he will grow feathers.

Leoben · 12-20-2020, 07:40 PM

If there was a Battle Royale in Texas it has hard to tell who would win. If we are just talking about size and brute strength, then Bjorn would win hands down. But what are the rules? If we are in the woods then survival skills would come into play. Not to mention age and experience. These young guys have a lot of energy but not a lot of experience. People like me and Kvalheim have been struggling for years before the team got good. So we are used to hard times. So if we were in the woods in a hunting type situation, we might have an edge. But I wouldn’t rule out Burlok Sulfurgold at the end of the day. With a name like that, he has to be tough. So yea, if it’s a bar room brawl Bjorn comes out on top. But if this is a Hunger Games situation then my money is on Kvalheim. He’s quiet. Real quiet. The kind you have to watch out for.

***Scrufdaddy*** · 12-20-2020, 07:43 PM

This is an interesting question because on paper, Slip McScruff should dominate, but we'll mess with the rules to screw him over. That is, entering players in order by number of hits. Can Slip McScruff fend off the entire Winnipeg Jets team one by one? No, by the 4th entry, Pojo Biscuit would crack his old bones.

Ok, so then who takes home the battle royale trophy? Yoshimitsu McCloud knocks out Goku Muerto after 20 minutes of pure striking. As Strom Chamberlain is handing over the belt, the lights go red and thunderous alarms start blaring. Chamberlain announces that there is one final contender that he hasn't beat. Who could it be? McCloud ended the 12 round survival of Nick Brain. He took out old man Muerto in the final minutes. Blunt was a one hit wonder.

Chamberlain dropped McCloud with a stunner in his confusion and threw him over the top rope. We all love to see a goalie fight, and this was no exception.

***Hallsy*** · 12-20-2020, 08:01 PM

I think Hugh Jazz would be the best person in a Battle Royale that had no weapons or anything and it was a more man vs man fight to the death match. He has the size and reach component over everyone in the league and I think he would be one of the hardest people to takedown on a regular basis. I think he could take the league all by himself in terms of strength he is one of the strongest and biggest people in the league. However if there was guns involved I think he would be one of the worst because of his size since he would be a bigger target something that will be easy to hit on a regular basis and something that would hard to hide from bullet fire and I think he could maybe try and build a house or something really quick due to his size and his ability to lift stuff but still I think hes just too easy of a target to hit.

Trautner · 12-20-2020, 08:12 PM

A battle royale that broke out between the SHL would immediately see Michael Scarn and Goldenface square off once again in a competitive fashion. While the famed bitter blood enemies were separated following Scarn's foiling of Goldenface's insurance fraud scheme to blow up the NHL All Star Game, it appears Goldenface has finally shown up in the SHL as a young prospect. Scarn and the rest of his Hamilton teammates will quickly arm themselves with weapons dropped in by his Dunder Mifflin associate Dwight Schrute who always has a huge cache of weapons on hand and available for any kind of impromptu battle or war. Goldenface will likely form alliances with other teams only to backstab his teammates when their backs are turned, and will make it to the final circle facing off against Michael Scarn. There, the two will have one final duel to seal their fates and Scarn will use a paper airplane to cut Goldenface open.

***Patty*** · 12-20-2020, 08:16 PM

The Atlanta Battle Royale would be a quick and explosive btw, affair. Cam would die instantly, trading life for death before the game even started. Falling off a float during the entrance parade. Simon would be the next to go, he'd crack some dumb joke at Leppy who would choke him out in an instant. TDZ would grab some food and hunker down until late in the event. GG will illegally get help from a sponsor and chill in an air-conditioned villa the whole time. Patty will kill Hotdog in his sleep by pushing him out of their treehouse. Leppy will kill Patty after running him down cause Patty insulted cheap beer. Assclap would be able to go deep into the event and he's strongest on the backend. Micool would prob drown or freeze in the middle of the event after Cal stole his lighter and/or blanket. Duff would also be able to go deep and it would probably be a showdown between him and Leppy at the end. Hard to say who would win.

Cyanide · 12-20-2020, 08:42 PM

The Battle Royal in the New England locker room would be a sight to see. The first part would first have standard hockey contests, much like the all-star game. Each player would be force to participate in each event, and would be scored by the coaches. The top 16 would advance into the knockout stage. A 16 player bracket would be made with the 1st seed taking on the 16th seed and so on. However the round of sixteen contest would involve a food eating battle. The player would eats more chowder within the 20 minutes given would advance to the top 8. These top 8 would participate in a no rule free for all in a cage match. The last player standing after the bloody fight is the winner. Any equipment within the training is fair game, however many of the heavier equipment was not used as unfortunately, the wolfpack still has to field a hockey team for its games.

Credit to Wasty
[Image: wolfpack3.png]

Credit to Sulovilen

*gurbs* · 12-20-2020, 08:44 PM

Honestly, I think we have quite a few guys on the North Stars that would be great in a battle royale. I would pick our whole team, solely because the more there is the better chance of winning. Obviously, our two IA would be the first to go; we would most likely use them as bait... sorry guys. I think we have a couple of thick body fighters on our team that we employ as our protection and I think they could fight for a while. First- Name Last-Name is just going to be standing back and shooting non-stop pucks at incoming people. I can't seem to score on the ice so maybe I can use my high shots somewhere else. So catch me just blasting shots from everywhere and anywhere; aiming for people's heads. I think as a team we will have a decent chance of holding our own for a while until we can.

Navigation

Extra Menu

About us