Your task: Tell me how your player would react to widespread rumors that a specific teammate had enjoyed a night of passion with their mother.

Please bear in mind that this prompt is open to creative interpretation. If night of passion means discussing a mutual love of the opera, great, you get full credit for that!

25 words minimum!

You will receive 1 TPE for fulfilling all requirements.

This PT will close Monday, December 4th at 11:59pm PST. Posts submitted/edited after the deadline will receive 0 tpe.

If you have any questions/concerns, please PM me. Tasks with malicious intent will not be graded. Graders reserve the right to determine what is malicious. You will not be warned.

This PT is for SHL players and send downs only; it is not for SMJHL Rookies. If your player is S75, go do the J task instead.

Grzegorz reaction depends on teammate and on how old Mrs Brzeczyszczykiewicz says night went. If you need to spend quality time with someone else's mother make sure you are good at it, no? No not like that, Grzegorz not kurwa George Martin character, not start worse rumor about me too!

I would be outraged for one. Because no one would fly to Czechia to take my mom out on a date. Only my dad can do that

PROFILE || UPDATE || RAGE.  




Luke Thomason || LW || Manhattan Rage || 2143 Max TPE
Born: 1/10/98
Height: 6'0
Weight 185 Lbs
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Regular season
SMJHL/SHL Stats
S42 | Van | GP: 50| G: 4| A: 8|P: 12|+/-: -10|MP: 457|
S43 | Van | GP: 50| G: 16| A: 19|P: 35|+/-: 3|MP: 951|
S44 | Van | GP: 50| G: 22| A: 31|P: 53|+/-: 9|MP: 1033|
S45 | SFP | GP: 50| G: 18| A: 19|P: 37|+/-: -5|MP: 1041|
S46 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 19| A: 24|P: 43|+/-: -3|MP: 1156|
S47 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 16| A: 28|P: 44|+/-: -15|MP: 1184|
S48 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 16| A: 24|P: 40|+/-: -13|MP: 1137|
S49 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 21| A: 28|P: 49| +/-: 13|MP: 1099
S50 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 21| A: 23|P: 44| +/-: 10|MP: 1157
S51 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 17| A: 22|P: 39| +/-: 5|MP: 1232
S52 | MAN | GP: 50| G: 24| A: 29|P: 54| +/-: 17|MP: 1193
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoffs
S42 Playoffs | Van| GP: 11 | G: 1| A: 2 |P:3|+/-: +3| MP: 101
S43 Playoffs | Van| GP: 10 | G: 4| A: 1 |P:5|+/-: -3| MP: 206
S44 Playoffs | Van| GP: 14 | G: 7| A:6  |P:13|+/-:-1 | MP:228
S46 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 12 | G: 3 | A:2  |P:5|+/-:-14 | MP:289
S47 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 5 | G: 3 | A:4  |P:7|+/-:2 | MP:119
S49 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 11| G: 6| A: 11|P:16|+/-: 5| MP:248
S50 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 6| G: 5| A: 5|P:10|+/-: 7| MP:137
S51 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 12| G: 7| A: 9|P:16|+/-: 4| MP:293
S52 Playoffs | MAN| GP: 19| G: 9| A: 13|P:22|+/-: 0| MP:438

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Transactions/Awards
S43 Named Assistant Captain for VAN Whalers
Drafted 3rd OA by San Fransisco Pride
S43 4 Star Cup Champion  
S44 Zach Miller Award for Most Dedicated
S44 nominee for the Damien Littleton award for most dedicated
S45 WJC Gold Medalist
S45 SHL Rookie All-Star Team
S46 Named Captain for Czechoslovakia
S45 Winner of the Damien Littleton award for most dedicated
S46 Nominee for Damien Littleton award for most dedicated
S49 Bronze Medal for Czechia
S52 Nominee for Anton Razov Trophy
S52 SHL 3rd Team


Arnost Holub || Vancouver Whalers GM/ Manhattan Rage Co-GM
S44 | W:27 | L:18 | OTL: 5 | P:59 | 3rd in League 
S45 | W:29 | L:17 | OTL: 4 | P:62 | 4th in League 
S46 | W:23 | L:21 | OTL: 6 | P:52 | 8th in League 
S47 | W:30 | L:17 | OTL: 3 | P:63 | 3rd in League 
S48 | W:28 | L:16 | OTL: 6 | P:62 | 4th in League 
Total | W:137 | L: 89 | OTL: 24 

Manhattan Rage  
S49 | W:33 | L:15 | OTL: 2 | P:68 | 3rd in League  
S50 | W:26 | L:20 | OTL: 4 | P:56 | 8th in League  
S51 | W:26 | L:18 | OTL: 6 | P:56 | 5th in League 
S52 | W:28 | L:21 | OTL: 1 | P:57 | 6th in League 
Totals | W:113 | L:74 | OTL: 13 
S49 Lance Uppercut Award
S51 Lance Uppercut Award Nomination
S52 Lance Uppercut Award Nomination

Playoffs
Vancouver Whalers
S44 | W: 7 | L: 7 | CF Round Exit
S45 | W: 6 | L: 6 | CF Round Exit
S46 | W: 1 | L: 4 | 1st Round Exit
S47 | W: 6 | L: 4 | CF Round Exit
S48 | W: 12 | L: 7 | 4 Star Cup Champions
Total| W: 32 | L: 28 | 4 Star Cup Champions

Manhattan Rage
S49 | W: 6 | L: 5 | CF Round Exit
S50 | W: 2 | L: 4 | Wildcard Exit
S51 | W: 5 | L: 7 | CF Exit
S52 | W: 12 | L: 7 | Challenge Cup Champions
Total | W: 25 | L:23 | 1 Challenge Cup

I want to start by saying I love the Elks, I love Regina, and Regina is by far my favorite.

With that being said, I will not address the rumors that any of my teammates fornicated with any of my family members.

Any more questions will be met with hostility and tears.

Colorado Raptors Capitan S42-Until Forever!
Czechia Wants you! Ask about a transfer!!

S74 - Troy McClure IIII
Late To Draft - Signed by Regina Elk
Drafted 18th overall in SHL Draft to New England Wolfpack






S42-Troy McClure III- D-Retired
Undrafted Signing-S41
S43-S52 SHL Totals: 500 games played 32 goals 189 assists 891 hits 10227 minutes
S41-S42 SMJHL Totals: 100 games played 10 goals 52 assists 187 hits 1818 minutes
S41-S52 Czechia Totals: 124 games played 12 goals 42 assists 230 hits 2468 minutes




Awards
S41 WJC Gold Medal Champion Co-GM!!
S42 Quilha Agante Trophy Winner
S42 Ideen Fallah Trophy Winner
 S44 Champion Cup Champion - Winnipeg Jets
S53 Champion Cup Champion - Hamilton Steelhawks

Ben Jammin would come out with a quick and to the point statement denying any of these rumors because his mom is a saint and would never act in this way.

(31 words)

  

    

Thank you @Stadacona for the Chaewon player sig!

I'm not one to kink shame, so if any of my teammates want to hook up with their own mom that is their business. I'm not into that sort of thing, but to each their own.

if anyone fucked my mom that would mean (assuming they are a human) that they're a human who fucked an eel and i would dub them an eelfucker. technically i am an eelfucker too but i am an eel so that would be normal for me, and the weird part would be if you're a human who fucked an eel (thus eelfucker). so i wouldn't so much focus on the fact that they fucked my mom but rather the part where they cross-species fucked an eel. @goldenglutes @Gwdjohnson @Jepox @micool132 @Duff101 @RenoJacksonHS @Gordon Bombay @blakec1414 @charlieconway @Ferda @leviadan @WannabeFinn wanna make sure you guys don't miss this one

thanks @Carpy48 and @frithjofr and @rum_ham and @Julio Tokolosh and @Briedaqueduc for the sigs

  

if anyone fucked my mom that would mean (assuming they are a human) that they're a human who fucked an eel and i would dub them an eelfucker. technically i am an eelfucker too but i am an eel so that would be normal for me, and the weird part would be if you're a human who fucked an eel (thus eelfucker). so i wouldn't so much focus on the fact that they fucked my mom but rather the part where they cross-species fucked an eel. @goldenglutes @Gwdjohnson @Jepox @micool132 @Duff101 @RenoJacksonHS @Gordon Bombay @blakec1414 @charlieconway @Ferda @leviadan @WannabeFinn wanna make sure you guys don't miss this one

@Zerg

thanks @Carpy48 and @frithjofr and @rum_ham and @Julio Tokolosh and @Briedaqueduc for the sigs

  

Dorothy Hefeweizen is a saint. I can only hope that at some point, BadWolf took her out for a nice Seafood dinner and otherwise treated her well. Allegedly, of course.

Sig credits: OrbitingDeath & enigmatic

Deth Klaw || Defenseman || Montreal Patriotes || 1175 TPE



Miguel Hefeweizen || SFP/WPG (retired) || S58-75 || 2077 Peak TPE

Lias immediately requests some clarification here because not only does he have two others, they are both…well, Harold, they’re lesbians. So that also means it was either Sydney Shaw or Rebecca Montagne who did this thing, and well…you know, Lias isn’t going to ask too many questions.

Gunnar Söderberg || IIHF Fed Head - Sweden || Former GM - Nevada Battleborn
------------------------------------------------------------
Highlights:
S45 WJC | Sweden - Bronze
S46 SMJHL | Drafted 5th OA - Kelowna Knights
S47 SHL | Drafted 2nd OA - Tampa Bay
S47 SMJHL | Captain - Kelowna Knights
S48 SMJHL | Captain - Kelowna Knights
S48 IIHF | Gold - Sweden
S49 SHL All-Rookie Team
S52 IIHF | Silver - Sweden
S56 IIHF | Bronze - Sweden
S57 Challenge Cup - Chicago Syndicate
S57 Anton Razov Award (Playoffs MVP)
S60 IIHF | Bronze - Sweden
S60 SHL | Captain - Chicago Syndicate
S61 SHL | Captain - Chicago Syndicate
S62 SHL | Captain - Chicago Syndicate
S66 SMJHL | Nour Harrak Award (Best GM Duo)

Lias Ekholm-Gunnarsson || D || Los Angeles Panthers
------------------------------------------------------------
Highlights:
S62 SMJHL | Drafted 26 OA - Nevada Battleborn
S63 SHL | Drafted 1 OA - Winnipeg Aurora
S63 SMJHL | All-Star
S65 SMJHL | All-Star
S67 IIHF | Top Forward
S68 IIHF | Gold - Sweden
S69 IIHF | Silver - Sweden
S70 SHL | All-Star
S70 SHL | Aidan Richan Award
S70 IIHF | Silver - Sweden
S71 SHL | All-Star
S71 SHL | Sergei Karpotsov Trophy
S71 SHL | Jay McDonald Trophy
S71 SHL | Sarmad Khan Award
S72 SHL | Challenge Cup - Winnipeg Aurora
S72 SHL | All-Star
S72 IIHF | Bronze - Sweden
S72 SHL | Anton Razov Award
S73 IIHF | Gold - Sweden
S75 IIHF | Gold - Sweden
S78 SHL | Challenge Cup - Los Angeles Panthers




. : : .

Alexandros Mograine would have no worry, as he is certain his mother would do no such thing and she would certainly make said players life miserable for spreading such a rumor

rip thunderdome is questionably a real person or even a human being thus does not have a mother. how one would have sex with his non-existent mother is beyond me

Thanks to @karey and @JSS for the sigs!

Teddy Cuddles  |  RW  | Edmonton Blizzard | Hall of Fame
Player Type : Two Way Forward
Height: 6'5" | Weight: 220 lbs | Age: 19
Number: 79
Birthplace: Providence, Rhode Island, USA
--------------------------------------------------------------
Regular Season Stats :
S35 | STL | GP:28 | G:2 | A:1 | P:3 | PIMs:5 | HIT:7 | Shots:25 | +/-:-4
S36 | STL | GP:50 | G:10 | A:10 | P:20 | PIMs:5 | HIT:97 | Shots:88 | +/-:-1
S37 | STL | GP:50 | G:13 | A:27 | P:40 | PIMs:56 | HIT:120| Shots:146 | +/-:+10
S38 | EDM | GP:50 | G:6 | A:7 | P:13 | PIMs:62 | HIT:114 | Shots:83 | +/-:-18
S39 | EDM | GP:50 | G:7 | A:15 | P:22 | PIMs:36 | HIT:161 | Shots:78 | +/-:-10
S40 | EDM | GP:50 | G:13 | A:29 | P:42 | PIMs:46 | HIT:197 | Shots:109 | +/-:+7
S41 | EDM | GP:50 | G:17 | A:17 | P:34 | PIMs:49 | HIT:143 | Shots:121 | +/-:-4
S42 | EDM | GP:50 | G:17 | A:24 | P:41 | PIMs:52 | HIT:135 | Shots:132 | +/-:+9
S43 | EDM | GP:50 | G:14 | A:23 | P:37 | PIMs:24 | HIT:121 | Shots:121 | +/-:-2
S44 | EDM | GP:50 | G:21 | A:32 | P:53 | PIMs:28 | HIT:131 | Shots:214 | +/-:+19
S45 | EDM | GP:50 | G:13 | A:24 | P:37 | PIMs:51 | HIT:170 | Shots:185 | +/-:+9
S46 | EDM | GP:50 | G:29 | A:31 | P:60 | PIMs:53 | HIT:152 | Shots:195 | +/-:+9
S47 | EDM | GP:50 | G:17 | A:33 | P:50 | PIMs:46 | HIT:182 | Shots:199 | +/-:+8
S48 | EDM | GP:50 | G:22 | A:23 | P:45 | PIMs:26 | HIT:182 | Shots:210 | +/-:+7
S49 | EDM | GP:50 | G:20 | A:25 | P:45 | PIMs:36 | HIT:149 | Shots:208 | +/-:+1
--------------------------------------------------------------
Post Season Stats :
S35 | STL | GP:7 | G:0 | A:0 | P:0 | PIMs:0 | HIT:2 | Shots:4 | +/-:+1
S36 | STL | GP:6 | G:1 | A:1 | P:2 | PIMs:7 | HIT:14 | Shots:12 | +/-:+3
S37 | STL | GP:13 | G:4 | A:5 | P:9 | PIMs:26 | HIT:26 | Shots:30 | +/-:+7
S38 | EDM | Did not qualify
S39 | EDM | GP:7 | G:3 | A:3 | P:6 | PIMs:4 | HIT:18 | Shots:10 | +/-:+1
S40 | EDM | GP:7 | G:1 | A:6 | P:7 | PIMs:4 | HIT:33 | Shots:15 | +/-:+2
S41 | EDM | GP:7 | G:2 | A:3 | P:5 | PIMs:12 | HIT:15 | Shots:15 | +/-:+1
S42 | EDM | GP:11 | G:5 | A:8 | P:13 | PIMs:10 | HIT:25 | Shots:38 | +/-:+1
S43 | EDM | Did not Qualify
S44 | EDM | GP:11 | G:4 | A:7 | P:11 | PIMs:12 | HIT:31 | Shots:42 | +/-:+3
S45 | EDM | GP:18 | G:7 | A:11 | P:18 | PIMs:24 | HIT:56 | Shots:68 | +/-:+8
S46 | EDM | GP:4 | G:0 | A:0 | P:0 | PIMs:2 | HIT:9 | Shots:11 | +/-:-5
S47 | EDM | GP:6 | G:3 | A:2 | P:5 | PIMs:6 | HIT:24 | Shots:25 | +/-:+2
S48 | EDM | GP:5 | G:2 | A:2 | P:4 | PIMs:0 | HIT:11 | Shots:19 | +/-:0
S49 | EDM | GP:23 | G:7 | A:17 | P:24 | PIMs:18 | HIT:76 | Shots:89 | +/-:-2
--------------------------------------------------------------
Awards and Achievements:
S37 | STL Kanye Summers Award for Regular Season Team MVP
S37 | STL Bradley Wingels Award for Best Forward
S40 | Gold Medal Winner
S40 | Aidan Richan Trophy Winner
S44 | Became 4th player in Edmonton Blizzard History to reach 1000 Hits
S45 | Challenge Cup Champion
S45 | Anton Razov Trophy for Playoff MVP
S45 | Silver Medal Winner
S46 | 1st Team All Star
S46 | Sarmad Kahn Nominee
S46 | Jef Darr Nominee
S47 | Jef Darr Nominee
S49 | Challenge Cup Champion
S49 | Anton Razov Nominee
--------------------------------------------------------------
Draft/Signing/Trade History:
S35 | Signed to STL
S36 | Drafted to Calgary 26th overall
S36 | Traded to Edmonton


Ambacas “Femboy Hooters” Cuddles | D | Tampa Bay Barracuda

Former USA Fed Head, Carolina Kraken Co-GM, Tampa Bay Barracuda GM

I would be very happy for my teammate. They are very luck to spend a night with my mother in her passion of figure skating.

Ty to Eni's Sig Shop

ty to ragnar

Mac Turner || F || Regina Elks
Mac Turner:
6'4:
219:
#37:
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL:
S72: GP:66 G:14 A:31 PTS:45
S73: GP:66 G:17 A:36 PTS:53
------------------------------------------------------------
Awards:
S72 Brandon Holmes - Top Defensive Forward(SMJHL)
S73 All-Defensive Team (SMJHL)

Elena would be pissed at her mom for cheating on her dad but she couldn't help but be slighly impressed deep down at the fact that her ancient mother was able to seduce one of her relatively young teammates. If you take the whole cheating part out of the equation, it would be high five worthy.

Elena Maximova | Defense | Los Angeles Panthers
Birthplace: Odessa, Ukraine
Number: 64
----------------------------------------------
S78: Won Challenge Cup with the Los Angeles Panthers
S76: Traded to the Los Angeles Panthers
S72: Won Four Star Cup with the St. Louis Scarecrows
S72: Traded to the St. Louis Scarecrows
S70: Drafted 3rd overall by the Minnesota Monarchs
S69: Won Quilha Agante Trophy (best SMJHL dman)
S69: Won Four Star Cup with the Québec City Citadelles
S69: Named ass-captain of the Québec City Citadelles
S69: Drafted 3rd overall by the Québec City Citadelles


Jasper Maximov | Defense | New Orleans Specters | Retired
Birthplace: Odessa, Ukraine
Number: 13
----------------------------------------------
S68: Won gold medal with Sweden
S66: Signed with the New Orleans Specters
S61: Traded to the Baltimore Platoon
S58: Won Four Star Cup with the Québec City Citadelles
S57: Won silver WJC medal with Sweden
S56: Drafted 9th overall by the Winnipeg Jets
S55: Named captain of the Québec City Citadelles
S55: Drafted 20th overall by the Québec City Citadelles


Мариа Максимова | Defense | West Kendall Platoon | Retired
Birthplace: Saint Petersburg, Russia
Number: 9
----------------------------------------------
Transactions/Achievements:
S38: Won gold medal with Russia
S37: Named alternate captain for the West Kendall Platoon
S32: Won bronze medal with Russia
S28: Won silver medal with Russia
S26: Named to the All-Rookie team
S26: Won gold medal with Russia
S26: Named captain of Russia
S25: Won Four Star Cup with the Kelowna Knights
S25: Won SMJHL Prospects Showcase as co-GM of the Outlaws (/w Lord Pretty Flacko)
S25: Drafted 4th overall by the West Kendall Platoon
S24: Named alternate captain for the Kelowna Knights
S24: Drafted 10th overall by the Kelowna Knights

The first thing I am doing is getting some therapy for my poor teammate. Next we are getting them to the nearest church and with the help of an old priest and a young priest we may be able to help them and expunge any of the evil that remains from such an act. Don't get me wrong I love my Mom, but she isn't exactly beautiful, and her horns, pitchfork, cloven hoofs and red hue skin. Most have learned to run or be warry of her. If my poor teammate did this unspeakable deed, clearly their soul is lost and they will likely never be able to recover...but they may gain unworldly abilities in exchange.

Sig by Lazyeye

Sig by DaBoot

Logan Webb || Kelowna Knights || Maine Timber || San Francisco Pride
Name: Logan Webb
Age: 22
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 200 lbs
Number: 55
Postion: LW
------------------------------------------------------------
SMJHL REGULAR SEASON
KELOWNA - S70: | GP: 66 | G: 21 | A: 26 | P: 47 | -3 | 28 PIM | 130 HITS
KELOWNA - S71: | GP: 66 | G: 23 | A: 42 | P: 65 | -25 | 24 PIM | 195 HITS
KELOWNA - S72: | GP: 66 | G: 21 | A: 35 | P: 56 | -31 | 34 PIM | 160 HITS
MAINE - S73: | GP: 66 | G: 44 | A: 48 | P: 92 | 23 | 48 PIM | 187 HITS
SMJHL Playoffs:
S70: | GP: 7 | G: 1 | A: 4 | P: 5 | +2 | 2 PIM | 5 HITS
S72: | GP: 6 | G: 3 | A: 3 | P: 6 | 0| 2 PIM | 12 HITS
S73: | GP: 13 | G: 9 | A: 14 | P: 23 | 0| 2 PIM | 12 HITS
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
AWARDS:
S70: Elias Armia Trophy - Awards in Excellence Given by League Commissioner
S71: Zach Miller Trophy - Awarded to Most Dedicated Player
S73: Four Star Cup Champions - MAINE TIMBER

Kain Webb || 21 || LW || Calgary Dragons || RETIRED
Kain Webb || 21 || LW || Calgary Dragons || RETIRED
Name: Kain Webb
Age: Retired
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 215 lbs
Number: 21
------------------------------------------------------------
Total - GP: 554 || Goals: 248 || Assists: 318 || Points: 566 || Rating: +118
Status: Hall of Famer & LEGEND
TROPHIES/AWARDS:
S06: Jesster Award (Dragons MVP)
[pbl]S09: Anton Razov Trophy
S12: Ron Mexico Trophy
S12: Jay McDonald Trophy
S13: Jay McDonald Trophy
S13: JJ Krever Award
S15: Jesster Award (Dragons MVP)
S15: Dragons Hall of Fame
S16: SHL Hall of Fame