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Troy_McClure03 · 01-18-2024, 12:43 AM

This is my 8rd weekly random ramblings around the Jr league and SHL. Please feel free to PM me if you have anything to contribute or add.

Starting off with anything replied from last Time, in 2023. Feel free to catch up right about....here

Czechia

Team Czechia is out of transfer slots, better luck next season! Czechia is Bestia! Czechia

Old Ramble Follow-ups:

@Fluw FLORIAN SÖDERBERG-MOTYLA was finally allowed out the box after 52 minutes. Florian was 11th in the SMJHL this season in PIMS, but number 1 in homemade chocolate candies! Thanks again for the Candy!!!

@RealDealer was spotted leaving a whole foods market with various cakes and cookies after locker clean out day in Nevada. We asked about it and were told to mind our cake.

New Rambles:

-The Head Office has successfully defeated the mouse invasion of 2023. They cleverly set out kraft singles in all the air vents in the Head Office Offices and managed to successfully catch all the mice. They are currently living out life sentences on an oil rig outside of Mississippi. No one from the Head Office was willing to answer our questions, nor were they able to give us a good cake recipe. Just sayin.

-The Detroit Falcons let slip that a train has helped them succeed this off season. a GRAVY TRAIN.... According to a source, who in the past may or may not have been accused of having some sort of bionic eye / visor, the Detroit Falcons Playoff Leading Scorer (DFPLS) has traded in the Old Spice for Trader Joe's Turkey Gravy. According to our source, @swoosh stopped using Tropical Storm Old Spice after their 4-2 win against QCC on the last game before the playoffs. The rumor is a member from the Citadelles snuck into Detroit's locker room and swapped the Deodorant for Gravy. We aren't saying it was @Konelu , but we aren't saying it wasn't Lukas Konecny. Anyway, Teemu Salami was so wrapped up in the pregame routine that they didn't notice the stick was changed for a box of gravy. It has been rumored that all of Detroit's players are now using various gravy's to mask the smell of musk. Related, a Gravy shortage has been reported in both Colorado and Detroit.

-The Colorado Raptors have not allowed the public or press to watch any morning skates since the playoffs started. The rumors have been from teams trying to steal strats, to the Raptors just hating their fans. Well this week a report has been received that has the real answer. According to netminder @TannerPitts , Left Wing Jussi Mutau ( @ThisSeemsFishy ) has been taking the morning skates in the nude. This all started after the last regular season game between Colorado and Regina, where a Big Bearded Defenseman from Regina stole the clothing and jersey out of Jussi's stall before the morning skate. Instead of trying to find the equipement, Jussi decided to sport ... their own equipment. After the run Colorado has had, who can blame them for sticking it out until the end?

So Feel free to vote , Nudity or Gravy. Poll Closes in 4 months, so take your time.

-With the draft coming up shortly, it has been rumored that @Kalakar has made a demand that ... pops. K POPS! According to reports from Multiple sources; DeMir Bellone will only go to an SHL team that will grant them a k-pop channel complete with commands containing K-pop Jargon. this includes !Trainee !Aegyo !V Live, ect. You all know these things , and totally won't have to google it , right?

-Speaking of draft news, and in direct violation of the gag order given to me 4-5 times now, @kahri has somehow been selected as the host city for the draft? While I have lots of thoughts on this, I was ordered by the judge asked to ask the following teams to bring the following for about 200-250 people who will be attending.

Head Offices : Please bring plates and cough drops. Please bring extra Ranch Dressing!

New England Wolfpack : You have been asked, since you are the champs, to bring cups.

Winnipeg Aurora: Please bring chips and dips, and Extra Ranch!

Philadelphia : If you don't bring the Philly Pretzel Nugget Tray, don't bother showing up at all. Rivets for all! Every Dipping sauce they make please!!

San Francisco Pride : Well all want that Rice-A-Roni treat. The good one, not that crappy off brand.

Edmonton Blizzard : I've been dying to try a Green Onion Cake. Make it happen!

Buffalo Stampede: Clearly you are known for one food and one food only. Sponge CAndy from Watson's Chocolates.

Baltimore Platoon: You know exactly what we want, Old Bay Brownies. Hook us up, Platoon!

Texas Renegades: You know Texas is known for its amazing foods, so please do us a favor and grab some Pizza from NY on your way.

Atlanta Inferno : Stop by a grocery store and grab some Pepsi products please!

Chicago Syndicate : Can you please bring some french fries and gravy, with cheese curds on it? Thanks!

Los Angeles Panthers : Tuna Salad, but warmed up. Like not hot, but warm.

Tampa Bay Barracuda : You don't have a pick until 49th, so unless you trade up, don't bother coming. If you show up, hook us up with some of those famous Buffalo Wings!

New Orleans Specters : You are known for how great your food is, and no one is denying that. Please Bring trash bags, paper towels , and toilet paper.

Hamilton Steelhawks: If it isn't too much trouble, can you get me Lin-Manuel Miranda's autograph? thanks.

Toronto North Stars: not going to lie, If you can get us some Shelby's Boutines and Family Boxes, that would be awesome.

Minnesota Monarchs: It isn't a party until someone brings the Guac, you know what I mean? You got us? thanks. No corn in it please.

Manhattan Rage : Can you bring us that drink that New York is most known for? Some Long Island Ice Tea? and some unsweetened Ice tea, please!

Seattle Argonauts: I heard you guys have really good Fish and Chips! That'll be great thanks!

Calgary Dragons: You guys have got to hook us all up with that local Muktuk!

Montreal Patriotes: We need some Rice to go with this spread, thanks!

I was also asked to let everyone know that parking is horrible, bring your own chairs, and there is only one working toilet so please be mindful. Also, all the ranch will be taken.

-During the very popular @Rich @luke Podcast, which is sponsored by Oprah from what I heard, The ever so humble Rich was broken by a mysterious person who announced that some test results came back... Around 1:20:00 in. It is worth a watch.

That's all for the updates for now! Feel free to PM on any Rambles. If you want to be anonymous, please say so in the title! Also feel free to send me any rambles!! Until next time, Good day, good news, good luck!

1200ish words, double media for draft stuff, also double it again because I had to look up every regions food to get it wrong and I am kinda embarrassed that I am a full blown adult that has my will and estate open on one screen and "whale blubber food" opened on another).(2x SHL Draft)

swoosh · 01-18-2024, 12:53 AM

Salami wouldn't be caught dead using Old Spice. Some cured sausage taped under each armpit does the trick.

Southie · 01-18-2024, 07:28 AM

I have so many questions. How old/rich are you that you need a will and an estate? I didn't even know those were different things until now.

kahri · 01-18-2024, 08:47 AM

i apologize in advance if @JamesT breaks the toilet

Troy_McClure03 · 01-18-2024, 09:37 AM

01-18-2024, 07:28 AMSouthie Wrote: I have so many questions. How old/rich are you that you need a will and an estate? I didn't even know those were different things until now.

I invented popcorn, so I am neck deep in kernels, if you know what I mean.

RealDealer · 01-24-2024, 07:27 AM

Fantastic

skyrrhawk · 01-24-2024, 08:57 PM

shouting out vlive is wild seeing as they killed vlive

Poll: Gravy or Naked? You do not have permission to vote in this poll.
Gravy	50.00%	6	50.00%
Naked	50.00%	6	50.00%
Total		12 vote(s)	100%

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