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S76 PT #2: Oohh, yo momma fight! Due: Sunday, April 21st @ 11:59 PM PST

Most of the rules in hockey are there for good reason, even if they are a little annoying. For example, icing is one of the most annoying penalties in hockey. It stops play, usually out of nowhere, and really doesn't make a ton of sense why it exists because of the offsides rules as well. I guess its designed to stop situations where people are dumping the puck from the complete other end in order to avoid pressure, but how often does that really happen in a given game outside of a powerplay, which icing is canceled for anyway. So really you just have this penalty that's there to stop play every now and then when someone does a bad pass or misses their man in the open ice. I think it would really speed up the game if icing was removed altogether, and players had more control over the pace of play and where the puck is going.

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(This post was last modified: 04-21-2024, 09:17 PM by Thunfish. Edited 1 time in total.)

I believe the whole sport of hockey could use a change in how long every match lasts. I have decided to look up the rules of the game through the Olympic website and I have to say that playing this thing for four quarters of fifteen minutes is a piss-take. I got a really hard time imagining people sitting down to watch a game that wank lasting that long, you should probably make it like three thirds of fifteen or something so people can go do something else with their lives as opposed to watching that for two hours.

...Wait, you mean ice hockey? Uh... Huh. How about writing a rule that bans Bettman from being a commissioner anywhere, active tomorrow? No severance package either, drive the point home on that wanker's face. Just for the hell of it. That is probably all I got. Look, being quite frank, hockey seems to have less shenanigans going over the other sports I care for which is pretty impeccable all things considered. You either have problems everyone else does or some minor stuff. Hell, nobody tried to get a game at Qatar or something stupid like that so congrats.

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Scarecrows Dragons Czechia
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Former Players: Yoshimitsu McCloud (LW, #64) - Outlaws pride Platoon Jets Aurora Ireland
Won a Four Star Cup once, knew ninjutsu, picture editors hated him, never tried free agency
Anton Harrier (LW, #90) - Battleborn Rage Ireland
Won WJC gold, liked skateboarding a lot, went to the finals with Manhattan, kept his seat glued in LR

Written Option #1

Eh social media beef isn't anything new to me, this time around it's some player I barely know who saw me getting more popular and he wants to jump on my new fame and get some new fans himself. But I don't care about him so I just ignore him, he brings up a questionable call late season and yeah it could have gone either way but they really need to get over it. I know it's not what most fans want but I really don't want to give this player any clout, if they have actual beef then we will settle it out on the ice like I always do. Although if it does get out of control on social media I can just post the picture of me and their girlfriend we took a couple of weeks ago. She was very friendly and I definitely don't wouldn't adding to her social media following.



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I think getting ride of offsides would be interesting. I obviously understand the appeal, but seeing how teams adjust with no offsides could be interesting. there would definitely be some cherrypicking, but the question is will teams try to defend the cherry pickers or would they try to take a man advantage in the offensive zone. I think some goals that get called back for offsides are really silly because the offside plays are so borderline some of the time. Like does it really matter that the puck was offsides by an inch a minute before the goal was scored? obvious yes in the spirit of the rule, but that is why it could be interesting to remove the rule. It would also mean less stopages in general which would lead to a faster paced and more intense game all around. i don't think offsides is a bad rule but i do think it would be fun to play without it

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I would implement three changes to powerplays. The first of these would make it so that minor penalties no longer end after the team with the man advantage scores. Not only will this carry the potential for more powerplay goals and offense overall, but to compensate, it will force teams to play cleaner hockey and hopefully weed out more of the constant stick fouls and obstruction that still plagues the game. Players who take penalties become more of a liability. In addition, I would make icing count during a penalty kill situation again. Similarly, I would make the change that scoring a shorthanded goal ends the current penalty (assuming the penalty is a minor). This changes the priorities of the penalty killers and those of the GM and coach. There are a number of relatively poor players who are only utilized because they are willing to block shots and dump pucks down the ice, providing little use elsewhere in the game. Forcing penalty killers to have to make real hockey plays while killing and incentivizing quick offensive breaks changes the type of personnel that would be used on the penalty kill to some degree.

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Written Option 2

If I could change any rule in hockey, it would be in the NHL, where the playoff format will be changed. There would be no more of these divisions playing each other in the 2v3 seeds, and the 1 seed playing a wild card, where the wild card may be harder than a division opponent. What I would be changing the format to would be the 1v16, 2v15, 3v14, etc..

I would be changing to this format because I believe it gives the teams that earned the top seed the advantage that they worked so hard all season for. Why work hard all season for nothing. Also this eliminates stale match ups that we see year after year and creates new rivalries. Wouldn't you want to see two rivals that usually play in the first round in the finals? I would. Creating new formats also keeps the game fresh for existing fans.

Written Option 2: If you could change one rule in hockey, of any league, which rule would you change, how would you change it, and why that particular rule?

I'm a bit of a hockey novice, but the scoring system in the NHL makes no sense to me. 2 points for a win (regardless of regulation or OT) and 1 for an OTL seems weird to me. I'm fine with using OT and a shootout to determine a winner instead of just calling it a tie like soccer does, but it's always struck me as odd that demolishing a team 5-0 in regulation is worth the same as squeaking out a win in what is essentially a glorified skills competition (the shootout is gross too for the record, but we'll solve that another day). I move to go to a 3-2-1 system: 3 points for a regulation win, 2 points for an OT/shootout win, 1 point for an OTL. My rationale for this isn't really based in anything concrete, it just seems to make more sense. And on a game to game basis it likely encourages teams to fight for more regulation wins as opposed to just playing for OT. Currently if the game is tied late there's no real reason to push for a regulation win since an OT win is worth just as much, and also comes with the guarantee of at least 1 point. The proposed system would fix that (allegedly) 


Social media? I don’t even have social media. So when I show up to the rink to get a skate in with some of my teammates in the offseason and they share that Rasmus Bergling has been calling me out on Twitter, I’m awful confused. But then again, it was expected for most of the offseason that I was going to be taking over the top D pairing spot that had been previously held by Bergling. Apparently, he’s just trash talking my overall play on the ice, saying that I’m not worthy of wearing the Chicago sweater and taking on the role of one of our shutdown defenders. And to be honest, he’s probably right. I’m young in my career and have a lot to learn. So, I asked my teammates that knew him to send him a personal message from me. That message just said, “You’re right, Bergy. Thanks for your feedback.”

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If I could change one rule within hockey it would be that there would be no offsides rule. By not having offsides there will be a lot more scoring opportunities and it would make the games even more interesting because the strategy of games would be completely different than what we have ever seen. It would be a simply change that would happen in the off season to allow for teams to begin to practice in the off season testing the no offsides rule and then it would be real good to see how it preforms in the pre season and then into the regular season. This rule change is very much needed to draw in more viewers and a larger audience that may not have understood what offsides in and now they do not have to worry about it. I strongly believe that this is going to be the best rule change in the history of hockey.







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Option 2

Let's face it, hockey as a sport is outdated. Sure, it's exciting enough, what with the fights and the missing teeth and the "flying around the ice on foot-blades" thing. But if hockey wants to gain any traction with the younger generations, it's going to have to evolve. It's going to have to roll up its sleeves and integrate the one feature the future generations want most: control. Imagine this: you're a wired-in Gen Alpha watching your favorite hockey team, but they're just not playing up to your standard. Maybe you think they're not utilizing the right players, or the tactics are all wrong. In the past you would have just had to roll your eyes and deal with it, but now, all you have to do is fire up the Puck'd™ app and spend one of your hard-earned credits ($19.99/ea) to vote on the change you think the team should make. Once voting closes (every 30 seconds or so) the team has to implement the voted change immediately or face a 2 minute penalty. Now your team is losing, but you get to take all the credit for it!

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Written option 1

As always I’m having beef with that little bitch Cale Salad. We’re always competing and the fans seem to like our banter back and forth. He knows exactly what he did, and calling me out is just straight up horse shit. I was cooking up some broccoli and the obtuse block head told me that broccoli sucks. Now, I let a lot slide but sometimes you just have to stand up in your beliefs. I picked up vegan burritos from a local too little known restaurant and schmeared it all over his front door. He didn’t take kindly to that practical joke so he started calling me out publicly. I think he’s just sour grapes that he didn’t get a letter this year to be honest. Well he can take his followers all telling him he’s right and shove it up his ass, I’ll have the last laugh this offseason.

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I think if I was granted the powers to make one change of the rules in the game of hockey, it wouldn't be a drastic change or anything. I would be simply eliminating the rule all together because it's a rule that I think is stupid. Its a rule that was put in to stop the best puckhandling goaltender, nay, the best goaltender, of all time, from controlling the puck on dump ins. Yes, I am talking about the dumb trapezoid behind the goaltenders net that was put in place to stop the legendary Martin Brodeur from being a third defenseman. I think its unfair that a goaltender cannot showcase one of their skills like puck handling. I remember watching Brodeur before the rule change and he would be out knocking down pucks and stopping the forecheck before it even started, AND starting his own teams forecheck. I still enjoy watching goalies play the puck and I think it really separates the talent from the good and the elite.

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If I could change one rule in hockey I would like to see more reviews with the assistance of technology. We’ve come too far to rely on the eyecheck and getting calls wrong. A number of sports have also been weary of introducing technology until the process is an enjoyable experience for everyone but at the end of the day getting the call right will make the most fans happy. I understand some fans will be unhappy when that call is initially made or overtuned with the assistance of technology but there’s no debate that it'll be the right call. Instead we have a system where the fan base goes wild and refereeing gets a bad rep for what could be a legitimately made call at the time. Its impossible to keep up with technology when comparing the human mind so I want to see more technology and reviews allowed in a manner that makes both the game and the viewing experience better.

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Option 2

If I could change a rule in hockey I’d probably adopt the “jailbreak” system that the PWHL has for shorthanded goals. While its good fundamental hockey and you can’t complain about it, just getting the puck in and dumping it out does create boring hockey. You know how exciting it gets when the penalty kill is playing more aggressive and if you can incentivize more aggressiveness it gets even better. While you can still dump it no problem, think of that reward if you score that short handed goal. You get a goal and you end  their power play, that’s such a huge momentum shift and can swing the game in your favor or put it even more out of reach. I just think it would make the already exciting game even more exciting, especially in a close game in the playoffs. Down one and you’re on the penalty kill but you see them giving you a lane, take it and jailbreak your teammate.

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