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Tracking Spreadsheet

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SMJHL S50 Game 244 - STL @ COL

SMJHL Game 244 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: FR Finn-Rhys @FinnRhys
Team: Colorado Raptors
Victim: Barrett Blackwood @MrStennett
Team: St. Louis Scarecrows
Time: 0:32 of 2nd period
Total possession time:  20:32
Hot po-take-to: Going into the last game of the year The Potato said screw it and decided to turn Rhys into a Halloween monster. He comes to the arena as an actual Werewolf, he is now over 8 feet tall and covered in fur. Rhys now how has super speed, super strength and super smell, and as he skates on to the ice the DJ plays Werewolves of London. The werewolf starts nodding his head to the song as he locks his focus into the game. In his transformed form he picks up an easy assist as the Raptors blitz the Scarecrows. Within 32 seconds of the second period WereRhys lays an unearthly hit on St. Louis star Forward Barrett Blackwood.

SMJHL Game 244 Advanced Taterlytics Report:
Posessor: Barrett Blackwood @MrStennett
Team: St. Louis Scarecrows
Victim: N/A
Team: Colorado Raptors
Time: N/A
Total possession time:  39:28
Hot po-take-to: The Potato decides to stay in the festive mood of the holiday and turns Blackwood into Hayes the Scarecrow. The new transformation doesn't really help his team as they continue to get destroyed, suddenly the Monster Mash plays over the speakers in the arena and Hayes Blackwood loses his mind and changes his hockey stick into a scythe. My dear reader I can not even begin to describe the gruesome scene that plagued the ice; blood, limbs, and decapitated heads litter the ice as there is no Raptor player left in one piece. You may be wondering why you never saw or heard this. The magic of Hayes the Scarecrow has forced everyone's mind to see the game that was seen on tv as reality. Because I am his teammate and write about the Potato, Hayes Blackwood and the Potato have allowed me to write about the truth that has happened here tonight. May god have mercy on the SMJHL's soul as it will receive no mercy from Hayes.        

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