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JHS · 04-22-2020, 11:09 PM

Why would anyone draft Konrad Danke?

This is likely a question at least some of you, those who have at least have some inkling of who I am, have asked yourselves since the SMJHL draft not so long ago. A man with a history of not exactly being the highest respected person on the planet, with questionable player drive, and a long period of inactivity does not exactly make for an exciting prospect. So, why is this player any more worthy of a look on draft day, or even a pick, than any other he has created during a controversial span of time around this weird little corner of the internet?

Well to you I ask:

why not Konrad Danke?

Since joining this site some 6 years ago, I have achieved it all: SMJHL GM, 4 Star Cups, and an almost unanimous position as the most annoying shitposter on the boards at a given time.

But there are just two things I have not accomplished:

An actually viable SHL player, and a Challenge Cup.

If you wondered why I even came back in the first place, after growing up for 2.5 real life years, there's your answer.

It is high time for me to be an actual asset for an SHL Franchise. Never doing so, despite all the time I wasted here, has been an abject failure for me, and it would be extremely pitiful if I never did so before moving on for greener pastures.

My player is built to be the most dependable player you could possibly ask for on your roster. An outstanding defensive center with a ton of build versatility and room for growth on the offensive side of the puck. I have not yet missed a week of updates, and have only not updated one week of this season despite being in the throes of coronavirus, school shit, and LSAT preperations. Simply put, I am the most devoted to my player that I have ever been, and because of my fairly low reputation, you can probably draft me in a fairly low round despite being a top 10 TPE rookie.

To those of you with skepticism about me, let me tell you this: I am not the person I was 2 years ago. But what remains is my activity and love toward whatever team I am placed on, something that none of you can doubt. Draft me, impart your knowledge of the new sim unto me, and get to know me as a person and player, and I will respond in kind with the most loyalty and dedication I can give.

I hope, in time, I can prove to everyone just why drafting Konrad Danke is a good idea after all.

P.S If you're one of these teams I would love to hear from you, since I've either always wanted to play there or I think the GM's and I might benefit from talking:

Stampede