As the Season 54 season winds down here in the SHL, Michael Scarn has announced to the public that he will opt out of his mutual option for Season 55 with the Buffalo Stampede for a record breaking 3rd time. Scarn has previously opted out at the beginning of Season 54 and a few days ago after Season 54 ended. With both of these attempts to opt out of his contract for Season 55 having ended in failure with the transaction being totally ignored in the SHL budget on both occasions, Michael Scarn will resort to opting out yet again at the conclusion of the Challenge Cup Final.
Per Michael Scarn's last public statement, sports mogul agent Darryl Philbin from Athleap or Athlead will represent Scarn in free agency. Philbin has outlined the following requests to any SHL team that wishes to hire the star secret agent from Scranton:
1. A beautiful signature that portrays Michael Scarn in his new team's colors. Branding is very important to Michael Scarn -- does he need to be liked? Absolutely not. He likes to be liked. He enjoys being liked. He has to be liked. But it's not like this compulsive need to be liked, like his need to be praised. A good signature is like a good car. Every manager needs a nice, flashy mid-size convertible to show off to his clients, or a limo to transport them to the corporate shareholders' meeting, because it is a sign of success.
2. An open position at center. Michael Scarn knows a thing or two about where he operates best. When Scarn was a paper salesman at Dunder Mifflin, he dominated the rest of his competition. He won that regional salesman award so many times that they gave him two plaques in one year. Scarn was later promoted to manager of the Scranton branch, where he needed some time to make that adjustment but ultimately became the very best branch manager in the history of Dunder Mifflin with the best selling branch in the entire company. For a brief period of one day, Michael Scarn was demoted to the position of salesman in pursuit of money, but Scarn realized that the manager position was where he belonged. Similarly, on the ice, Scarn knows that center is where he can operate at his very best.
3. A salary raise of no less than 12%. Michael Scarn worked at Dunder Mifflin for over 14 years without earning a single pay raise. Under the guidance of former warehouse foreman Darryl Philbin who is now one of the most premier sports agents in all of the world, Michael Scarn is better equipped to know what he is worth to whichever company or team employs him. Scarn knows all of the best negotiation tactics in the world, because of Wikipedia. Anyone in the world can write anything that they want on Wikipedia, which is how you know it will always be the very best information possible in the world. With these secret negotiation tactics in hand, Scarn will dominate any contract negotiation and you had better bring a good offer to the table. You give me a good raise, or no more sex.
[S46] Michael Scarn - F - Philadelphia Forge
Drafted #17 Overall Season 45 Draft by Colorado Raptors
Drafted #27 Overall Season 46 Draft by Winnipeg Jets
TPE: 1500 | Lifetime TPE: 2122 | Peak TPE: 2057
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Career Highlights:
5x SHL Challenge Cup (S55, S56, S58, S61, S63)
2x SHL All-Star 1st Team (S57, S58)
2x SHL All-Star 3rd Team (S55, S56)
1x Sarmad Khan Trophy (S57)
1x Sergei Karpotsov Trophy (S57)
1x IIHF Silver Medal (S53)
2x IIHF Bronze Medal (S49, S54)
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SHL Regular Season:
SHL S47 (WPG): 50 GP, 15 G, 11 A, 26 P, +/-: +3, 24 Hits
SHL S48 (WPG): 50 GP, 08 G, 15 A, 23 P, +/-: +2, 24 Hits
SHL S49 (WPG): 50 GP, 11 G, 13 A, 24 P, +/-: -9, 33 Hits
SHL S50 (BUF): 50 GP, 12 G, 12 A, 24 P, +/-: +4, 68 Hits
SHL S51 (BUF): 50 GP, 15 G, 15 A, 30 P, +/-: +1, 7 Hits
SHL S52 (BUF): 50 GP, 20 G, 25 A, 45 P, +/-: +3, 8 Hits
SHL S53 (BUF): 50 GP, 19 G, 34 A, 53 P, +/-: +11, 157 Hits
SHL S54 (BUF): 50 GP, 20 G, 38 A, 58 P, +/-: +32, 107 Hits
SHL S55 (BUF): 50 GP, 20 G, 40 A, 60 P, +/-: +34, 123 Hits
SHL S56 (HAM): 50 GP, 13 G, 42 A, 55 P, +/-: +37, 124 Hits
SHL S57 (HAM): 66 GP, 36 G, 57 A, 93 P, +/-: +54, 129 Hits
SHL S58 (HAM): 66 GP, 36 G, 45 A, 81 P, +/-: +11, 141 Hits
SHL S59 (SEA): 66 GP, 18 G, 41 A, 59 P, +/-: +17, 142 Hits
SHL S60 (SEA/HAM): 64 GP, 23 G, 39 A, 62 P, +/-: -7, 112 Hits
SHL S61 (HAM): 66 GP, 27 G, 33 A, 60 P, +/-: +45, 112 Hits
SHL S62 (HAM): 66 GP, 27 G, 43 A, 70 P, +/-: +41, 95 Hits
SHL S63 (HAM): 66 GP, 24 G, 32 A, 56 P, +/-: +43, 82 Hits
SHL S64 (PHI): 66 GP, 23 G, 31 A, 54 P, +/-: +29, 79 Hits
Career: 1026 GP, 367 G, 566 A, 933 P, +/-: +351, 1567 Hits
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Trophy Case/Achievements:
S44 WJC Gold Medal, Team Czechoslovakia
S46 WJC Gold Medal, Team Czechoslovakia
S48 SHL Cole Reinhart Trophy, Winnipeg Jets
S49 IIHF Bronze Medal, Team Czechia
S52 SHL Nomination for Aiden Richard Trophy - Most Improved Player
S53 IIHF Silver Medal, Team Czechia
S54 SHL Nomination for Jeff Dar Trophy - Best Two-Way Forward
S54 IIHF Bronze Medal, Team Czechia
S55 SHL Challenge Cup, Buffalo Stampede
S55 SHL All-Star 3rd Team
S56 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
S56 SHL All-Star 3rd Team
S57 SHL All-Star 1st Team
S57 SHL Sergei Karpotsov Trophy - Most Points
S57 SHL Sarmad Khan Trophy - MVP Voted by Players
S58 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
S58 SHL All-Star 1st Team
S61 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
S63 SHL Challenge Cup, Hamilton Steelhawks
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Transactions:
S46 Signed 1 YR / $5.5M contract with Winnipeg Jets
S46 Traded to Halifax Raiders from Colorado Raptors
S47 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Winnipeg Jets
S48 Signed 3 YR / $18M extension with Winnipeg Jets
S50 Traded to Buffalo Stampede from Winnipeg Jets
S50 Signed 5 YR / $30M extension with Buffalo Stampede
S55 Opted out of 1 YR / $6.0M mutual option with Buffalo Stampede
S55 Signed 1 YR / $8.0M extension with Buffalo Stampede
S56 Signed 1 YR / $9.5M contract with Hamilton Steelhawks
S57 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S58 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S59 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Seattle Argonauts
S60 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Seattle Argonauts
S60 Traded to Hamilton Steelhawks from Seattle Argonauts
S61 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Hamilton Steelhawks
S62 Signed 1 YR / $5.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S63 Signed 1 YR / $5.0M extension with Hamilton Steelhawks
S64 Signed 1 YR / $6.0M contract with Philadelphia Forge
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Playoff Statistics:
SHL S48 (WPG): 19 GP, 6 G, 8 A, 14 P, +/-: +5
SHL S49 (WPG): 5 GP, 1 G, 0 A, 1 P, +/-: -1
SHL S50 (BUF): 6 GP, 3 G, 1 A, 4 P, +/-: +3
SHL S51 (BUF): 8 GP, 2 G, 3 A, 5 P, +/-: +5
SHL S52 (BUF): 15 GP, 6 G, 4 A, 10 P, +/-: -1
SHL S53 (BUF): 4 GP, 0 G, 3 A, 3 P, +/-: -1
SHL S54 (BUF): 13 GP, 2 G, 6 A, 8 P, +/-: -2
SHL S55 (BUF): 17 GP, 6 G, 7 A, 13 P, +/-: +6
SHL S56 (HAM): 18 GP, 6 G, 13 A, 19 P, +/-: +7
SHL S57 (HAM): 14 GP, 5 G, 9 A, 14 P, +/-: 0
SHL S58 (HAM): 19 GP, 6 G, 17 A, 23 P, +/-: -4
SHL S59 (SEA): 10 GP, 6 G, 3 A, 9 P, +/-: -2
SHL S60 (HAM): 10 GP, 1 G, 7 A, 8 P, +/-: -2
SHL S61 (HAM): 19 GP, 6 G, 15 A, 21 P, +/-: +17
SHL S62 (HAM): 22 GP, 3 G, 11 A, 14 P, +/-: +4
SHL S63 (HAM): 25 GP, 5 G, 9 A, 14 P, +/-: +5
Career: 224 GP, 64 G, 116 A, 180 P, +/-: +39
ml002 Registered
Classless, Assless, Deaf, and Dumb
You're supposed to ask for a raise of 15% and then get 12% smh
I know a place where nothing matters and you can do whatever you want
[S69] Tiberius Kane | Left Wing | GFG | 473 TPE
S67: WJC Silver
S68: Drafted 3rd Overall to GFG
S68: Drafted 14th Overall to TEX
S69: WJC Bronze
[S67] Nichael Fitted + [S64] Backup Goaltender
[S50] Tom Fiddler | Two-Way Center | Peak 2006 TPE | RETIRED
Drafted 4th round, 34th overall in S49 SMJHL Entry Draft
Drafted 2nd round, 24th overall in S50 SHL Entry Draft
Traded to Tampa Bay for a ham sandwich in S52
* = First Place
Career Stats | GP | G | A | P | +/- | Hit | SB | Sh | GA | TK
SHL Regular | 657 | 144 | 284 | 428 | -213 | 777 | 1013 | 1520 | 292 | 393
SHL Playoffs | 39 | 5 | 14 | 19 | -16 | 63 | 52 | | |
IIHF Regular | 168 | 19 | 45 | 64 | 7 | 153 | 90 | | |
SHL Regular Season Stats
Szn |Team| GP | G | A | P | +/- | TOI | Hit | SB | Sh | PIM
S53 | TBB | 50 | 5 | 15 | 20| -24| 17:16 | 46 | 77 | 56 | 10
S54 | TBB | 45 | 1 | 10 | 11 | -80 | 18:35 | 60 | 171 | 55 | 17
S55 | TBB | 50 | 1 | 19 | 20 | -56 | 18:37 | 31 | 86 | 82 | 14
S56 | TBB | 50 | 5 | 15 | 20 | -35 | 19:22 | 34 | 112 | 101| 20
S57 | TBB | 66 | 14 | 32 | 46 | -26 | 24:48 | 64 |100 |152 | 20
S58 | TBB | 66 | 29 | 40 | 69 | -2 | 25:59 |100| 74 |180 | 20
S59 | TBB | 66 | 19 | 39 | 58 | -3 | 25:33 |105| 95 |188 | 14
S60 | TBB | 66 | 23 | 23 | 46 | 4 | 22:33 | 66 | 50 |159 | 26
S61 | TBB | 66 | 10 | 35 | 45 | 12 | 22:17 | 98 | 72 |182 | 20
S62 | TBB | 66 | 16 | 23 | 39 | -2 | 20:23 |104 | 57 |183 | 4
S63 | TOR | 66 | 21 | 33 | 54 | -1 | 20:29 | 69 |119 |182 | 39
SHL Playoff Stats
Szn |Team| GP | G | A | P | +/- | TOI | Hit | SB | Sh | PIM
S59 | TBB | 5 | 1 | 1 | 2 | -6 | 22:11 | 10 | 5 | 12 | 0
S60 | TBB | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | -6 | 22:49 | 8 | 1 | 7 | 0
S61 | TBB | 13 | 1 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 21:06 | 17 | 13 | 29 | 0
S62 | TBB | 12 | 1 | 3 | 4 | -4 | 20:01 | 20 | 18 | 24 | 2
S63 | TOR | 5 | 2 | 1 | 3 | 0 | 21:16 | 8 | 15 | 15 |0
SMJHL Career | GP: 200| G: 36 | A: 102 | P: 138 | +/-: 42
SMJHL Playoff Career | GP: 52| G: 9 | A: 23 | P: 32 | +/-: 5
SMJHL Regular Season Stats
S49 | MTL | GP: 50 | G: 3 | A: 16 | P: 19 | +/-: 2 | FO%: 42.43% | FOT: 898
S50 | CAR | GP: 50 | G: 6 | A: 15 | P: 21 | +/-: -6 | FO%: 50.93% | FOT: 1237
S51*| CAR | GP: 50 | G: 11 | A: 38 | P: 49 | +/-: 24 | FO%: 53.08% | FOT: 1313
S52 | CAR | GP: 50 | G: 16 | A: 33 | P: 49 | +/-: 22 | FO%: 53.33% | FOT: 1202
SMJHL Playoff Stats
S49*| MTL | GP: 17 | G: 2 | A: 7 | P: 9 | +/-: 5 | FO%: 51.96% | FOT: 433
S50*| CAR | GP: 18 | G: 4 | A: 5 | P: 9 | +/-: 5 | FO%: 50.28% | FOT: 356
S51 | CAR | GP: 6 | G: 2 | A: 2 | P: 4 | +/-: -1| FO%: 47.68% | FOT: 151
S52 | CAR | GP: 11 | G: 1 | A: 9| P: 10 | +/-: -4| FO%: 51.34% | FOT: 261
Awards
S49 Four Star Cup
S50 Four Star Cup
S51 Laurifer Trophy
S51 Petr Klimek Award for the Best Two-Way Player with Joseph Weston
S52 Honorary 3-way Laurifer Paricipation Trophy
S52 Alternate Captain of Carolina
S52 Petr Klimek Award for the Best Two-Way Player with Joseph Weston
S52 Kurtis Hunter Award for Team's Choice MVP
S52 IIHF Gold Medal
S53 IIHF Bronze Medal
S54 The Winless Season
S54 IIHF Silver Medal
S55 IIHF Gold Medal
S56 IIHF Silver Medal
S57 IIHF Silver Medal
S58 IIHF Silver Medal
S60 IIHF Silver Medal
S61 IIHF GoldMedal
IIHF Federation Head - Great Britain
S56: Silver
S57: Silver
S58: Silver
S59: DNQ
S60: Silver
S61: Gold
S62: DNQ
S68: Lost 1st Round
S69: Bronze
Fuck the penaltys
ARGARGARHARG
06-30-2020, 08:37 PM PremierBromanov Wrote: I know a place where nothing matters and you can do whatever you want
Scarn goes from over a point per game to 8G, 12A and a -54, sounds great!
ml002 Registered
Classless, Assless, Deaf, and Dumb
06-30-2020, 08:46 PM jfisherr Wrote: 06-30-2020, 08:37 PM PremierBromanov Wrote: I know a place where nothing matters and you can do whatever you want
Scarn goes from over a point per game to 8G, 12A and a -54, sounds great!
historic
06-30-2020, 08:46 PM jfisherr Wrote: 06-30-2020, 08:37 PM PremierBromanov Wrote: I know a place where nothing matters and you can do whatever you want
Scarn goes from over a point per game to 8G, 12A and a -54, sounds great!hes a scrub
Capy Bara || D || Vancouver Whalers
Name: Capy Bara
Age: 17
Birthplace: Japan, Sendai
Height: 6ft 11
Weight: 200 lbs
Number: 1
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Career Statistics:
SMJHL Regular Season:
S64 | 0 GP | 0 G | 0 A | 0 P | 0+ | 0 H | 0 SHT | 0 SB
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SMJHL Playoffs:
S64 | 0 GP | 0 G | 0 A | 0 P | -0 | 0 H | 0 SHT | 0 SB
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Transactions:
Drafted 30th Overall by the Vancouver Whalers