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Dextaria · 03-08-2021, 07:40 PM

My conspiracy theory lights are coming on because as the co-GM of the Vancouver Whalers, I have a feeling that more than just Narboza Manyhands is an alien on the team...

The first other player that is the obvious alien is Zebulon Leavitt. With a name like that, we started to have our suspicions and when he's playing with Manyhands there seems to be a connection... Dubbed the "alien" line, I'm pretty certain Leavitt and Manyhands aren't from around here.

Next up is Wile Coyote, he says his name is based on the Looney Tunes character but I have a feeling he's one of those aliens hidden under a human suit. Maybe an alien that took shape of the first thing they saw once they landed on Earth many years ago??? Then to continue to hide as he can't shapeshift again due to complications is now wearing a human skin suit to fit in with society as he waits for his alien mothership to pick him up.

On to the fishes... my red lights are already flashing because I think it's obvious that they came from an aquatic alien world. Robot Sunfish... Strawberry Sailfish... these aren't regular names and they are clearly not afraid to let us know that their home planet is ruled by fish. As of right now, I'm not too sure of their motives but I overheard them in the locker room talking about "freeing the fish." I'll definitely keep a close eye on them.

There's definitely a couple more players in the locker room I have had my suspicions of... but no clear evidence yet. I will update the league if I get more information, but until then follow the story on my Whalers conspiracy theory blog.

cahtah haht · 03-08-2021, 07:40 PM

I suspect that Cian McFelter of being an alien because he is so incredibly bad at hockey. There is no way someone who is a real human trying to be good at hockey would only score 43 points in 50 games, so the only logical explanation is that he is actually an alien posing at a human and he is just learning how to play hockey now.

hewasajazzman · 03-08-2021, 07:40 PM

oh there are quite a few Aliens around the SHL, this i know for sure. i know being an Alien is something some may want to keep secret... but the Aliens that i know are proud of it. infidel, alaska, shiny, coa, jy, cal, blast, emi, aw, valor... hell, wozy even. all Aliens, trust me.

Matteo · 03-08-2021, 07:40 PM

I have a sneaking suspicion that @Hordle is actually an alien and has been slowly replacing all my Quebec City teammates with alien versions of themselves. Where he takes my real teammates, I don't know, but I'll keep everyone updated.

**leafs1997** · 03-08-2021, 07:42 PM

This would make a lot of sense! I suspect @Titan of being an alien. We keep telling him he seems quite old, but never accepts it! He is adamant that he's quite young. Perhaps he IS young according to his alien calendar?

***Ohtaay*** · 03-08-2021, 07:49 PM

I think @sve7en & @hockeyiscool are aliens. Lets be honest, who uses place holder posts for an mPT? Using one on a normal PT thread is quite a reach as well.
There is something fishy going on with these two, and Manyhands may be the only one who can help unravel the truth.

nyumbayangu · 03-08-2021, 07:55 PM

While it is true that other aliens have visited the planet earth, as of right now I do not believe that there are any others among your population. I will, however, continue my research on you humans and should I find any among you who are not of your species, I will most certainly let you know.

zeagle1 · 03-08-2021, 07:55 PM

I suspect @Hordle to be an alien. He is simply too nice of a person to be human. No matter what is happening in his life or to his sim league players, he has one of the most positive outlooks on life that is contagious to be around. Even if he is having a bad day, he will always be there for others. It is a pleasure to share a LR with him on QCC, and to be coGMs with him in another sim league. <3

dankoa · 03-08-2021, 07:55 PM

I suspect that @ThatDamnWalrus is an alien. He is officially the dankest member of the SHL and is constantly smoking big doinks and the reason I think he’s an alien is because no human could possibly consume as much weed as he does; in short he is the GOAT

*roastpuff* · 03-08-2021, 08:02 PM

Although he might not be an alien, Commander Shepard might be a robot instead. He's very quiet, seemingly is able to see everything, and scores with a machine-like provision.

***Gwdjohnson*** · 03-08-2021, 08:07 PM

There's a few people in this league I'd categorize as potentially aliens, and I have been monitoring their behaviours to draw up a potential portfolio on them to submit to the History Channel. Let's have a look at some:

1. Scoochie Stratton @honkerrs : Scoochie is a unique goalie compared to the rest of the leagues netminders. It seems that he shows no emotion or passion for the game of hockey itself when he plays, but rather seems to always be analyzing the other teams' skaters and goalies in order to 'optimize' himself as a prime specimen in the league, like a sort of alien trying to conquer the human race itself. Several teams are completely incapable of solving Stratton as a goalie, and more teams should become worried as Stratton's research data expands.

2. Jay Sink @Memento Mori : Something is just not right about how sink plays. He is built up to be a player who only plays defense, yet he simply scores every time he contributes to an offensive play. Could he be a being from another planet that has found the optimal approach to ice hockey? Is he related to Scoochie in this regard?? Is he even human????

3. Axel Meszaros @ml002 : Meszaros seems to also have a strange lack of passion out on the ice when he plays hockey, despite being a very solid player. He never really expresses any joy in his own accomplishments as a player, instead only weighing things he does against Seattle player Gabriel Johnson, as he constantly claims to be a better player than him. What is up with his undying obsession with being better than Johnson? Is it some kind of directive from an unknown leader to make Johnson obsolete as an SHL player?

Tylar · 03-08-2021, 08:19 PM

My alien among us is the one and only Andrei "Clean" Kostitsyn. Clean is a weird species so it only makes sense that he is actually an alien. How else can his behavior be explained? He must be an alien, but a good one in my opinion!

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***Bayley*** · 03-08-2021, 08:19 PM

I know who the alien is. I really cannot believe no one has found out who it is. There is no question from the amount of dad jokes that this person has. Is he googling it or is he just an alien. The answer is simple. He's an alien. It's @Muford

***bluesfan55*** · 03-08-2021, 08:38 PM

I suspect that anyone who uses the "ph" in PT tasks are aliens as they speak to each other in code. ph stands for "possible humans" so they know whose brains to extract and hold place in.

ty to @High Stick King @EvilAllBran and @Ragnar for the sigs

***TheSparkyDee*** · 03-08-2021, 08:43 PM

I have a weird feeling the new rookies for Season 60 are all aliens. It is just weird to see all the players act like aliens on the ice. I saw one of them bleed.... GREEN!!!

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