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S75 PT#5: Who you gonna call? Due: Sunday, March 17th @ 11:59 PM PST
(This post was last modified: 03-17-2024, 09:38 PM by MikeLiut.)

PBE affiliate

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Ekaterina Valieva - Baltimore Platoon

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Thanks @Lazyeye for the sig!

PBE Affiliate

DorkDipplet -> DirkDigglet

Well, I will not be blackmailed by some ineffectual, privileged, effete, soft-penised, debutante. You want to start a street fight with me bring it on but you're gonna be surprised by how ugly it gets, you don't even know my real name- 

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(This post was last modified: 03-17-2024, 10:00 PM by Runningman434. Edited 1 time in total.)

Written Task: For most of the season your player has been struggling to have restful nights sleep as ghosts have been visiting their dreams. At this point there is no longer doubt about it, the home of your player must be haunted.

Is it time to call an exorcist or maybe a real estate agent and get rid of the house? Maybe just burn it all down and move as far as possible? Maybe your player is more business minded and they might instead take the opportunity to sets up real haunted house or start a company for ghost busting, something with cool name and a catchy theme song, as they cannot be only ones with this problem.

Sean Davies isn't about to setup and profit from these ghosts. It's clear that they aren't able to rest easy for some reason, and it's up to Davies to give them the chance to be at peace. And, no, he isn't calling some hack exorcist. He's going to handle this himself. First things first, he's pulling up Amazon and buying an Exorcisms for Dummies book. Thanks to the perks of next day shipping within 24 hours he'll have the book in hand and know what he needs to make this work. Probably a bunch of candles and incense. Maybe more. But once he has that all set up, he's inviting all his Wolfpack teammates over and asking them to bring bad luck hockey equipment to "sacrifice" in a bonfire. Stick broke on a crucial slapper? Fire. Skate blade keeps popping off? Fire. Puck that went bar and out? Fire. It's all getting burnt. And as master of ceremonies Davies will be sire to use just the right amount of candles, incense, and Latin incantations to rid the house of bad juju and let the ghosts who've been harassing him rest easy so he can finally get a good nights sleep.


philippe eko eel is proud to have his honored mentor eko van otter serving as his mentor. there is a strong relationship between the three entities here - philippe eko eel, eko van otter, and the mysterious GM of the atlanta inferno who goes by the name of hotdog. to be specific, the relationship is that they are all three the same guy (me). but for the sake of elaboration and argument lets say they're not all me. in this reality, eko van otter walks the tightrope between team and player - he has a vested interest in his player's salary, of course, so he wants Eel to get paid. But he also has a vested interest in the team's success, being a franchise legend and hoping for the best for Atlanta. So he is in the perfect position to negotiate between the two parties! Philippe eko eel accepts a bit of a pay cut on his contract, known as a home town discount, thus providing the franchise some cap leniency; this makes the team better and more successful, which yields superstar status for eel, which gets him some dope sponsorships, of which Otter reaps a cut too! Everybody wins!!

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thanks @Carpy48 and @frithjofr and @rum_ham and @Julio Tokolosh and @Briedaqueduc for the sigs
Armada Inferno norway

Option 1:
Finally dealing with the ghost that's been haunting me for the whole [PT] Season with its one true weakness.
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Option 2

Kristian Seppanen does not have an agent because Kristian Seppanen has no need for an agent. Kristian Seppanen is smart with his money, only spending 30 percent of his cheque on SHL trading cards, with the other 70 percent being spent on his vices, such as buying skates, training for hockey, and the occasional performance enhancing drug (PED). Kristian Seppanen only does this because he knows so many other players in the league do this. The last agent Kristian Seppanen had was a man named MrPresident, who stole all his money and spent it on Ice Level trading cards for his personal collection. He didn’t even get any cool cards from it, he had to trade cards for them. Kristian Seppanen is considering getting a new agent, but only time will tell what he decides or who he decides. However, it will not be this season, nor next, for Kristian Seppanen - as his agent problems are a thing of the past.


Option 2 Written Task:

At first, Daniel Grumathan was really hesitant to get an agent to represent him. Growing up his parents were always very secure with their finances and personal information so some of that kind of just rubbed off on Daniel as well. What really opened his eyes to the value of having an agent was just talking with his teammates. Seeing how less stressed they were about contract talks and while it was somewhat enjoyable, learning finances can be difficult and being your own representative is time consuming. Luckily Grumathan was able to turn to an old friend that was already working in that area of work and was more than willing to represent him going forward. He has helped a lot in being able to handle contract talks, giving better insight to the more business side of hockey (advertisements, sponsorship, etc.) and better budgeting for the future. Over the years they have been really grown close that he is often the first person to call in terms of emergency or just questions.

Option 1 Written

Celly is way too frugal to be worrying about selling or moving out or any of that. I mean, honestly, it's a perfectly good residence, and they're still not really convinced it's haunted, so why do all that work? Plus, Celly's taken on the particular sacred captaincy duty of Party Hosting because they, you know, have a place that works for it, and that's not worth giving up because of a few theoretical ghosts that might actually just be figments of their own over-exhausted imagination.

So what if there's the occasional cold spot? It's just a draft, they'll deal with it later, or more likely just put on another hoodie. A photo of the team falls off the wall? They probably jostled it by falling down the stairs or stumbling into a wall coming home from a night out. Everything is completely explainable by rational means that do not involve ghosts and most definitely do not involve a need to move out of the place. Party hosting over all else.

[170 words]


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Nathaniel has been representing himself in negotiations since it was time for pre draft interviews. He fired his agent in the smjhl after getting into an argument after a team interview. They had a disagreement about what Nathaniel wanted out of pro life. Ever since his priority has been enjoying life, getting better at the sport and winning. Well he hasn’t achieved that glory yet, and this off-season when negotiations began he laid it out his wants and frustrations in front of the philly GMs. “I want to win first and foremost now, that’s my priority. Can we get there in Philly? I’m a bit sick of losing every season to New England. “ the bosses heard him and wether they were lying or truely believe in their team, they said yes. Let’s see how that belief works out, but for now we’re giving it one last push. One more go and see if we can get over any humps.

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Alright my player Might-go Ia and their agent. Have a really unique relationship and origin story. Before my players hockey career he was an extra for a knock off local Disney on ice. Had a big rat suit and skated in that. One day while changing out of his costume he expressed to the janitor there that he wanted a career change and wanted to play hockey. It just so happened that the janitors cousins sisters friend was a janitor at a nearby stadium where they were holding a hockey combine for potential SHL draft prospects. They were able to sneak might-go into the showing where he actually preformed well enough to get drafted. After thanking the two janitors he realized he would need an agent so he asked the pair if they wanted to represent him at the next level. And they agreed and thus the clean guys sports agency was born. (155)

Sim Wen has a mega agent who has helped many past stars such as Pablo Salvatici and Nolan Sawchuk achieve SHL superstardom. The guy has never given a real name to his clients but he gets them hella deals on whatever they need and gets them the bankroll to afford these deals. If you need a purebred stallion to race across the desert to prove that you aren't a coward he'll have you a deal on one done within the hour. This has in fact happened to Sim Wen since he lives a superstar lifestyle already and loves to prove it. We've got no idea how the man has these kinds of contacts but he we do know for sure that he's good at his job. People have though that maybe this masked magician might be @micool132 and his commission is how he affords all his cards but I don't think we'll ever truly know.

155 words

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Wow it has been 3 months and I’ve not had a solid rest in quite some time. Perhaps this is due to all of the crazy hockey ghosts visiting me and waking me up and showing me tortures beyond all mom’s comprehension. Well I got news for you ghosts, I know that it is my flat that is haunted! I’ve hired the best real estate agent in Atlanta to come sell my flat. to be a real estate agent, you need high levels of education and excellent character. Not everyone can email a docusign, and sell people things that they are looking for. I’ve hired micools uncle Jonny Micool to sell my home. Little did I know that on game day Johnny Micool hosted an open house with alcohol and a Water slide. He totally ruined my loft and caused water damage in the basement. Now he won’t return my texts. I’ll never get rid of the ghosts. I’m sad.

Edouard Lavoie's agent is none other than renowned sim sports agent, Chett Ching. Ching's clients include former PBE catcher and hall of famer, Keegan Halverson, as well as journeyman ISFL players Tyler Montain and Charlie Thorsen. In addition to these players from other leagues, Chett Ching has represented one other player in the SHL, Ole Olson, who recently retired from the league after playing several seasons in New Orleans and ending his career in Atlanta with the Inferno. Chett is no stranger to Lavoie's new SHL team, having negotiated with them in the past for Olson. Chett finds his job fairly easy, as he chooses to sign clients who are in it for the team and generally want to do their best to find team success and therefore have few demands. Chett was the best used car salesman in his little part of suburban Calfornia before moving into the sports agency business. His smooth talking skills helped him land some reputable clients without actually having to do too much work.

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Gewmba is known for being fond of the melatonin elderberry gummies by power up athletics. So it's very odd for him to be losing sleep all season while taking up to a double dose of these delicious gummies before bed every night. So obviously, Toast has cursed all of the Maine players with a wonderfully nuisant poltergeist.

What are we to do about such a ghastly spectre? (The poltergheist, not Toast). Well first we are going to find one of those old ladies with the big glasses to perform a seance to determine the reason for the haunting and what Toast did to transgress with the spirits there. Second options will depend on the response, but they range from sacrificing Toast to the spirits themselves, or just magicking up an awesome flamethrower to spread democracy to the forlorn spirits.

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Lord Raiden has used the same agent since he was little. That is because it is his father. Harold Raiden. Harold has done everything to get Lord into the best spots throughout his entire career. The first big shot that Raiden got was due to his father working tirelessly. A week before the SMJHL draft, Raiden decided to enter the draft. His father went above and beyond to get Raiden's name out there by sending highlight tapes to every team. It was a long shot but ultimately, Colorado took a chance on him in the 6th round. Lord Raiden quickly proved any doubters wrong. And Harold went back to work got to talkin to SHL teams. Harold helped Lord Raiden to get drafted to Baltimore where he spent 17 seasons. Raiden still has gas left in the tank, so Harold got him a deal with Toronto. It was truly a great experience to continue my career. Now Raiden is heading into another free agency hoping to continue his career. Harold got his work cut out for him again.

-178 words

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Thanks to @DELIRIVM @sköldpaddor @Merica for the Sigs




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