Oh no! Patya am take puck to brain and maybe not feel so good! But is okay, Patya wake up but...wait...Patya am no longer player of the hockey! WOWIE! Patya now professional actorman! IS INCREDIBLE! This great because Patya still rich and famous but it give Patya more opportunity for work on speaking English. Patya still practicing but not there yet. Anyway, Patya want for big lights of Hollywood, which is funny because Patya am ghostmans and not kittycatmans now. Patya make all kinds of movies! Maybe even being villain in James Bond movie? Patya not dumb, am recognize many Bond villains am being Russian, and this be big break for Patya! Plus, am very handsome, so would look good next to James Bond, no? These movies am having many beautiful womens but Kristen Landry always number one for Patya, so she am not having need for worry. Maybe am have her on set? But...what if Patya am not loving Kristen in new life? OH NO THIS NOT GOOD! PATYA NOT WANTING THIS! PATYA READY FOR COME BACK NOW!
So I got bonked on the head and now I'm a professional hockey coach. Sweet. First thing I do I get a dazzly suit and work on my power pose. I see a lot of sequins and flashy ain't the half of it. Probably a bright green... oh crap I lost the visual and now all I can see is myself as a pimp. Though... the argument could made as to the same-same nature of the job. Tryin to get your hoes to pay up. Either in cash or goals. You spend a lot of time and money to get them in game-state readiness and you can't help but be disappointed if they don't score for you. Actually, never mind the coach gig... I'm goin straight pimpin. But in hockey. With a bright green suit and a walking stick. Power pose indeed. Learning from Jay Woodcroft to be honest...
Lacksamus would definitely be one of those people that travels around and reviews those awesome hotels and resorts. You gonna pay me to stay in a fancy ass hotel, eat and drink at fine restaurants, and explore the activities they provide? Sign me up! I never really understood how people got those jobs in the first place though. Is there a hotel reviewing degree you are supposed to get? Are you just someone's niece/nephew and get that awesome job? Well in this scenario I guess I have that hookup or whatever because there I am - sitting poolside, drinking whatever the drink of the day is, and charging it all to the company that is paying me to do it. I suppose the downside is that you are traveling all the time so that would make the whole family thing tough, but if I was still single then it would definitely be my dream job. Just a dream though...
After a rather bizarre turn of events, Svoboda woke up to find himself as the newly minted head coach of the reigning SHL champions, the Los Angeles Panthers. Surely this would be an easy task, as the team has had plenty of success already these past few seasons. Where most would choose not to rock the boat too much, Svoboda has decided the game has become too boring, and needs more offense. As such, he decided to run a 5-0 formation in every situation, be it forecheck, backcheck, in the neutral zone, on the power play. He even tried to run a 5-0 on the PK until he was told he could only ice four skaters, at which point he pulled the goalie so he could once again put out five forwards. He had a dream to revolutionize the way the game was played, expecting to increase the amount of goals scored by a large enough margin to attract wider interest in the sport across the country. Instead, the team went 0-10 to start the season and he was fired from his position. Just like that, Svoboda's brief coaching career came to an end.
I think one of the games Archie streams a lot suggests what he might enjoy as another career of his - Cities: Skylines show his love for the city planning and while it's a career that requires quite a bit of studying, Archie does have some horsepower in the upstairs department aswell, and it shouldn't be that much of a problem. Obviously, an engineering job, no matter how well it's paid, doesn't quite compare to playing in the SHL, but it's shouldn't be the worst paid position in the world and it should allow Archie to live comfortably regardless. It's a very different job to being a profesional athlete, but these differences do somewhat translate into who Archie is as a player - someone smart, with good decision making, very controlled and planned in his movements, and someone very flexible with the situations that might arise while working, whether it's a hockey game play, or a very, very weirdly shaped bridge.
Manhattan Rage | General Manager
thanks Sulovilen for the sig!
D | Manhattan Rage | Czechia
Being that he's Swiss and that he's an intense competitor, the natural fit for Taschen Messer in an alternate universe is probably as a Formula 1 driver. I would compare him to Michael Schumacher, but I have since discovered that Schumacher is in fact German, not Swiss as I previously thought. Well, they both speak German anyway. At 1.86 meters tall (that's 6'1" in Freedom Units), he'd be one of the tallest drivers on the grid, but currently there's at least four current drivers around the same height, give or take a centimeter. The F1 version of Taschen would be significantly slimmed down though, he weighs in at 100 kg (220 lbs.) without his hockey gear on, and no current F1 driver tips the scales at more than 74 kg. He'd have to work off 25-30 kg, minimum to be competitive. A lot of it would probably have to come off the lower body, since I'm not sure that a hockey ass would be able to fit into an F1 seat. He's used to wearing hockey pads and a helmet, so a sweaty firesuit and racing helmet would be no problem. They'd probably smell better than hockey pads after use anyway. He plays hard-nosed hockey, so he can handle the physical punishment of getting knocked around, but he'll need to work on strengthening his neck to cope with those lateral g-forces in the corners. Neck Day will replace Leg Day at the gym. F1 lends itself well to the type of competitor Taschen is: super nice, genuinely charming guy when he's "off the clock," but an absolute asshole in competition. That should make him popular with the fans, if perhaps not with his fellow drivers. Then again, he's such a charmer when he's not racing that even the other drivers might like him in spite of themselves. And successful or unsuccessful, even the worst F1 drivers are multi-millionaires, so financially he might even end up better off. He might be disappointed when he hits his head a second time and wakes up as a minor-league hockey player again, actually. Minor league hockey players don't get to spray champagne at French supermodels nearly as frequently as F1 drivers do.
If Roderic Banes was not a simulated hockey player, he would love to pursue his interest in cooking as a simulated chef! His passion for food and good nutrition, as well as his tendency to explore new and exciting (thought not always appetizing) flavour combinations would make him well suited to this pursuit.
Though the world of sports could never be far from Roddys heart, he would like to open a restaurant/meal prep service catered to high-performance athletes. The menu would feature high-protein meals, along with vegan and vegetarian alternatives, and offer a relaxed, yet dignified atmosphere. The meal prep service would be an extension of the menu, and clients could have these same, high-quality meals delivered individually, or in shipments of up to 1 week at a time.
If he met with success in the venture, the next step would be taking these quality meals into the pre-packaged world, offering healthy, frozen meals, ready to heat and serve from the freezer.
If your player could choose any job outside of being an SHL player, what would it be and why? Simulated doctor? Simulated European truck driver? What other talents or passions does your player have that they want to explore? What does this life look like? Is it super different? Or do you end up rich and famous anyway? (150+ words)
After waking up following a nasty puck shot to the face, I found myself in a hospital bed to a strange sense of unease. I was told that I had actually had an accidental fall at my job which was not at the ice rink, but instead at the local school as the teacher of the 1st grade. I returned to the class the next day to teach the young students everything a class of 1st graders needed to know. My class had made me a get well card and some of the parents had brought me fruit and cakes to offer their condolences for my injury. I taught the kids about dinosaurs, trains, and even some multiplication and division. The best part of the day was gym class when we played dodgeball and played with the giant rainbow parachute thing everybody loves to play with. When I woke the next day however, I learned that it was all a dream and I was still just a hockey player.
I could see my player being an officer in the British Army. He's got leadership moxie, he is well in shape, strong, and tough. All of these qualities are what you look for in a soldier bar none and especially in one who leads other men and women in combat. I think my player would enjoy that kind of life, its not too unlike hockey. It requires working with a team, keeping in shape and working toward a common goal and cause. Plus you can indeed end up rich, not so much famous unless you win a medal or recognition but everything is provided for you. Plenty of chances to squirrel away money for a rainy day. Not to mention, a chance to retire at a youngish age with a full pension, something you are not guaranteed in the show. Like hockey, you have plenty of opportunity past your playing days/active time to put your experience to work for you in a high paying job.
Welp, joans is the coach now, and Joans can finally bring in all the ideas that he had for the team and implement them without being told he's absolutely insane and should stick to playing defence. I think the first thing Joans would try would be to implement a high octane offence. Doesn't matter if the other team is scoring as long as you're scoring more than them. 5 forwards? sure thing, especially when the game is tied or you're looking to catch up. At this point in todays game, playing as a Defenceman is basically playing as a more defensive forward. 5 forward power play units would be the norm, there really is no good reason to have a dman on a power play unit unless they're like Joans and basically a forward. dmen wouldn't touch the ice during overtime. There would just be a lot more defence and a lot more offence in general if Joans was coach. fun times for all
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