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bbp · 12-17-2020, 08:38 PM

SMJHL TEAMS THE GOONEST IS AVAILABLE

Hello SMJHL GMs,

I know that none of you gave me any thought on draft day but I’ve gone and shown you how ridiculously stupid you all were. I’ve played 5 seasons in the SMJHL, had double digit goal performances, hundreds and hundreds of hits, led the league for shot blocks by a forward and oh yeah… punched half your faces in! Plus you know won a championship here with Halifax.

Now unfortunately my time in Halifax may be coming to an end. We haven’t been the elite team of seasons past and that means the cycle of junior hockey will take over management… time to trade everything. I’m one of those pieces that will be up on the block and I’m telling you now that I want to win. Here is what I offer.

1) Willing to play 4th line.

Yes that’s right folks I’m a goon by nature and am down to play forth line if it wins me a championship. Talk about a huge big game impact player to add for your fourth line.

2) Punches.

Yes folks punches. That is my bread and butter and something that I bring night in and night out. Last year in the playoffs I went 3/3 after going 11/12 in the regular season. I’ve tied some battles this season but I know when its playoff time I’m going to give your boys a push!

3) Defensive responsibility.

Do you have an offensively competent star playing on the penalty kill? Save their strength! Let me block shots its what I do! Plus I am not brain dead in my own zone positionaly and will nail people into the board to generate some turnovers!

There you have it folks. I’m a bottom six grinder. Who is willing to play the crap minutes no one wants and do my best to give the team a lift when they need it.

Go get me GM’s don’t make the same mistake twice!

Words: 330

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LordBirdman · 12-17-2020, 08:45 PM

This is extremely enticing, but sadly we are not buyers this deadline. Good luck in finding a new goon home!

What are your plans for next season?

ACapitalChicago · 12-17-2020, 08:46 PM

S66 Damian Littleton

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bbp · 12-17-2020, 08:49 PM

12-17-2020, 08:45 PMLordBirdman Wrote: This is extremely enticing, but sadly we are not buyers this deadline. Good luck in finding a new goon home!

What are your plans for next season?

Beg for a SHL job?