Login

***yosh*** · 04-05-2021, 02:46 PM

In Season 55, Vaseline Podcalzone landed at St. John’s International Airport with only a suitcase and a bag full of hockey equipment. Drafted in the 3rd round of the Simulation Major Junior Hockey League draft, in his pocket was just his phone and some pocket money that he earned working part-time jobs or freelance gigs. The young Russian had never played in a professional league, having spent the peak of his pre-North American career playing junior hockey in Russia.

An unproven player who was drafted primarily off the basis of raw potential, Podcalzone finally had some money in the bank once he arrived at the rink. With one quick signature, he had signed a contract to play for the Newfoundland Berserkers, the SMJHL team that had drafted him 31st overall.

After getting settled into a rented out apartment only a brief stroll away from the Mile One Centre, Podcalzone took in the sights of the port city. Assuming that he could stay on the team, this would be his home for several seasons to come.

Only a few hours later, Podcalzone was set to take part in his first team practice with the Zerkers. Arriving at the rink, Podcalzone found the Newfoundland training staff had provided him with new equipment ahead of the season. His old and worn out skates from all of his years of junior hockey were replaced with a freshly sharpened pair, and he had an entirely new set of hockey sticks.

As he tried on the equipment, Podcalzone was greeted by Finnish centre Lassi Suhonen, who introduced himself as Podcalzone’s linemate. Despite a bit of a language barrier, the two were able to immediately hit it off, and there was a lot of chemistry to be found on the ice. Impressed by this, Podcalzone slotted onto Suhonen’s wing on the Berserkers’ fourth line, where they were also flanked by Niccolo Livius.

To put it quite bluntly, Podcalzone’s rookie season was certainly a wake up call. His style of play was not suited enough for the North American rink, and it was clear that he lacked the same level of experience that the other players had. Spending the season exclusively on the fourth line, Podcalzone recorded a pair of goals and six assists for a total of eight points on the season.

Although the results were discouraging, it was not enough to stop Podcalzone, who embraced his role as a fourth line energy guy ahead of the playoffs. While his contributions offensively continued to remain scarce, Podcalzone found his place as a relentless grinder, and unleashed his grit in a pair of fights during the Berserkers’ playoff run. A fight in Game 5 of the Four Star Cup finals gave the Zerkers the energy to finish off the series, resulting in the team’s first Four Star Cup in franchise history. As he lifted the cup over his head, Vaseline Podcalzone felt that he had finally found his place in Newfoundland, and was ready to run it back next season.

In Season 56, Podcalzone arrived at the rink for the Berserkers’ first practice feeling like a completely new player. Over the off-season, Podcalzone was drafted 23rd overall to the expansion franchise Seattle Argonauts of the Simulation Hockey League, and was beginning to feel a lot more confident about his play, having spent the off-season training in both Seattle and Newfoundland.

With several players from last season getting called up, Podcalzone was now expected to step up into a larger role with the team. The fourth line grinder Podcalzone was no more, as the expectation was that he would become a top six power forward for the Berserkers in their cup defense season.

Playing nearly double the ice time that he did in his rookie season, the improvement was apparent. Podcalzone racked up 11 goals and 17 assists in his sophomore season, becoming a critical part of this Newfoundland team, on and off the ice. After improving his English significantly over the off-season, Podcalzone stepped up as a vocal part of the Berserkers locker room.

Unfortunately, Podcalzone’s playoff performance was lackluster, and his play was exposed against the opposing team. In 17 games, Podcalzone only put up four points. Although the Berserkers were able to make their way back to the Four Star Cup finals, they were bested by the Vancouver Whalers in six games.

Sitting in his stall in the locker room after their Game 6 overtime loss, Podcalzone vowed to be better, and to step up his game for his sake and for the Berserkers.

Year #3. Podcalzone returned to the Berserkers in Season 57 even more determined than ever before. He had trained all over the world during the off-season, spending a few weeks in Russia training alongside professional coaches, while also taking part in a prospect camp in Seattle, before finally settling back into Newfoundland for the team’s training camp and pre-season.

As he arrived at the rink for the first day of camp, he was greeted by Lassi Suhonen, who took over as captain of the Berserkers last season. Suhonen and Podcalzone were only a select handful of players that remained from that Four Star Cup winning team. His fellow draft class member, Jonas Kahnwald, was also still around, as well as Niccolo Livius, Renji Atake, and assistant captain Liam Slate.

Suhonen showed Podcalzone to his stall, where he was greeted to the sight of his jersey with an A stitched on the front.

Vaseline Podcalzone was now an assistant captain of the Newfoundland Berserkers, along with Jonas and Liam.

Putting on the jersey with an enormous grin on his face, Podcalzone couldn’t help but feel both honoured and emotional. He had come a long way from his days as a rookie, and now was becoming a leader in the locker room.

With most of the lineup consisting of fresh faces, Season 57 would prove to be a rude awakening for the Berserkers. With a younger group, the team was no longer the same one that had steamrolled through the SMJHL in the past two seasons. Newfoundland finished with the worst record in the league during Season 57, and several of Podcalzone’s long known teammates were traded to other teams. Slate went to Quebec to help them chase a championship, and Livius was sent to Anaheim.

Despite the shortcomings, Podcalzone, along with Jonas and Lassi, stepped up as leaders of the team, with the three of them leading the Berserkers in points. Pod finished with a sweet 16 goals and 29 assists for a total of 45 points. During the regular season, Lassi and Pod were reunited on a line once more, and alongside sophomore winger Bas O’Bigbers, they would form the Vas-Las-Bas line.

Although the Berserkers knew that they were not in the best shape to contend, the captains gave the team an emotional pep talk ahead of their first playoff game against the Maine Timber. While the content of this pep talk has not been shared openly, whatever was said was enough to give the Berserkers the momentum they needed to stun the SMJHL world, upsetting the #5 seed Timber in five games.

In Game 1 of the series, team captain Lassi Suhonen potted a hattrick, with Podcalzone racking up three assists. The story of playoff Pod would soon develop into a common story in St. John’s during the team’s playoff run. When he wasn’t putting up the points, Podcalzone was menacing the opposing team, forechecking aggressively and finishing checks. He would finish with 9 points in 11 games during the playoffs.

In the second round, the Berserkers found themselves facing the juggernauts of the league that season, the Quebec City Citadelles. All eyes were on the Berserkers and how they would play in this David vs Goliath season, and boy did they deliver, pushing hard against the Citadelles. Unfortunately, they came up short in the series, as the Citadelles defeated the Berserkers in six games to advance to the Eastern Conference finals.

In Season 56, there was nothing more than disappointment at the end of the Zerkers’ playoff run. But this time around, there was a feeling of hope. This team had given arguably the top team in the league a run for their money, and in a year where they were not expected to contend, the Berserkers went and made it to the second round. Although there would be some hard goodbyes to be said (Lassi would get called up to Chicago, along with Jonas, who would join the Los Angeles Panthers), Podcalzone had faith that Newfoundland was once again on the rise, and ready to contend for the Four Star Cup once more.

Season 58. It’s a long way from Podcalzone’s rookie season now. At this point, Podcalzone is the sole remnant of that Four Star Cup winning team, with everyone else long gone.

It is quite an odd place to be in, but if anything, Pod cherished the role of becoming the team veteran. The players now looked up to Pod and put their faith in him, and he was more than ready to prove that he deserved it.

Ahead of the beginning of the season, the coaches gathered the players for an important team meeting. There, they announced that with Lassi’s departure from the team, they needed to fill in the captaincy role.

Bringing in Ryuuji Minamino, who captained the Newfoundland Four Star Cup team, the coaches then announced to the team that Vaseline Podcalzone would captain the Newfoundland Berserkers in Season 58.

And so began the era of Captain Pod. Knowing that his time as a captain would be scarce with a callup impending next season, Podcalzone was hell bent on winning a Four Star Cup to close out this chapter of his career. The Berserkers were in good shape to contend as well, with their returning players having developed into huge pieces for the team, and rookie players stepped up big time, exceeding all expectations and helping Newfoundland turn in a third place finish in the regular season.

Podcalzone’s fourth season was filled with ups and downs, as his play was noticeably streaky. There would be games where he strung up several points, but he also found himself on lengthy droughts. At its worst, Pod had around 20 consecutive games without a single point. Nevertheless, Pod still finished with a career high 21 goals, along with 20 assists for 41 points on the season.

However, the slumping Pod would not arrive in the playoffs, as the return of Playoff Pod burned a fire in Newfoundland, as the team took down the Maine Timber and Nevada Battleborn with ease. In the conference finals, they were greeted by the Anchorage Armada.

In Game 1, they fell to the Armada 3-1. Podcalzone buried the sole goal for the Berserkers.

In Game 2, the Berserkers obliterated the Boats with a 8-0 game. Podcalzone only contributed a single assist to the cause.

In Game 3, the Berserkers fell to the Armada in overtime, 2-1. Podcalzone went pointless.

Game 4, a 4-3 loss to Anchorage. Another pointless affair for Pod, as the Berserkers fell to being one game away from elimination.

Game 5. Newfoundland is eliminated from the series, losing 2-1. Vaseline Podcalzone had an assist on the sole Newfoundland goal, in what would prove to be his final game as a Berserker. He finished with 15 points in 15 games during this playoff run.

232 Regular Season games. 50 goals and 72 assists. 122 points.

60 Playoff games. 9 goals and 23 assists. 32 points.

From a fourth line grinder to team captain, Vaseline Podcalzone has had as fulfilling of a junior career as you could wish for. With his departure from the team, this marks the end of an era for Newfoundland, but at the same time, it will mark a new beginning for the team. With one chapter ending, another one begins, or so they say.

As he departs from St. John’s International Airport for Seattle ahead of his first ever actual training camp with the Argonauts, Vaseline Podcalzone brings alongside him only a suitcase and a bag full of hockey equipment.

WC: 2024

JNH · 04-05-2021, 02:47 PM

YES

POD MEDIA

YES

**Lime** · 04-05-2021, 02:47 PM

BEEG

Navigation

Extra Menu

About us