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***sköldpaddor*** · 03-20-2019, 04:01 PM

Blog Post 5: March 20

KELOWNA, BC --- Hello again everybody! As I’m writing this, we only have four games left in the regular season. That completely blows my mind. This season has gone by so incredibly quickly, but I feel like I’ve learned so much and been so many places in that time, it’s hard to believe it’s all almost over. And this is just the beginning, of course, but rookie season only happens once, and I’ve tried to make the most of it. We’ll be in the playoffs soon, and then there will be another draft, and another whole bunch of new guys and I won’t be the new kid anymore, and that’s pretty crazy to think about. I think some of the guys on the team are going up to the big league next season, too, and I’m really glad I’ve had the chance to play with them, to learn from them and all that. I hope I can be that for somebody next year, even if it’s just in a small way. It’s funny how you spend your whole life looking forward to something, working for it, and then before you know it, you’re in it, and you realize that you’re exactly where other people were when you started looking up to them.

I think everybody who comes in and out of your life was there for a reason, honestly. Even the ones that didn’t turn out well, the ones you may never speak to again, I think everybody has some little lesson you can learn from them. I have an ex from when I was like fifteen, and things didn’t work out between us, but we’re still friends and he sends me new music sometimes. And then there’s my best friend from when I was really little, and we had a falling out (a girl was involved, it was a big mess and honestly it was mostly my fault) but even though we don’t talk anymore, I learned a lot of stuff from him. He made me a better hockey player and a better person and even the bad stuff made me appreciate the value of honesty and having people in your life that you can trust and who will have your back - and the importance of being that kind of reliable honest friend to the people who care about you.

There’s also the guys on the team that I live with - me and Dima hit it off real early on, but me and Sasha didn’t get along great at first. And looking back, I think that’s good, because I think it gave me sort of a safe person to lean on a little and somebody I had to work a little harder for. I’ve learned a lot from living with them and becoming friends with them. I’ve learned a little Russian, a little about cooking, and a whole lot about how to put up with people (even people you like) when you’re around them pretty much every hour of the day. I learn new things from both of them every day, if I’m honest. I know it’s hard sometimes to admit when you have areas that need improvement, but I realize that when I first came here, I was so focused on hockey that I didn’t really appreciate the importance of the off-ice stuff, and pushing myself out of my comfort zone there too. Obviously hockey is the biggest thing, that’s where most of my focus is, but the other stuff has more of an impact on the way you play than I think a lot of people realize. I took a lot of stuff for granted playing back in Sweden, just little daily things, because even when I was playing in cities away from home that didn’t really prepare me for the little things that would be different when I moved to Canada.

And that’s all way more important than you realize at first. Time zones, environments, even just going from knowing the faces of people you walk by on the street - when you’ve lived in one place for eighteen years, it’s hard to overstate how many things you don’t realize will be an adjustment. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so glad I’m here - Kelowna is an incredible place and I’m getting to know my new neighbors and all of that. But all of that makes it even more important, I think, to be able to come home and spend time with people you really enjoy being around. And I really do enjoy being around these guys, even if we’re just playing video games or bickering over what color shower curtain to put in the bathroom (the one we have is hideous, okay), I don’t think my rookie season would have been nearly as enjoyable if it weren’t for them. They are definitely going to read this and make fun of me, but I don’t care, because I want everybody to know how important I think it is to let yourself rely on other people for things.

I don’t mean like, making other people do everything for you, or not being independent and self-sufficient. I just mean that I’ve seen a lot of players who will be buddies with guys in the locker room and on the ice, but who shut their personal life off from that. And I guess there’s some justification for that; you never know if you’re going to get traded or if you’re going to end up playing against these guys in a season or two. But I think it’s worth it. Whatever risk you’re taking, I think it’s worth it for what you get out of it and what the people you let yourself get close to get out of it. Because in the end, even if you end up in separate places and you aren’t as close as you used to be, you still learned things from each other and it helped you become the person you’re supposed to be.

I guess that’s all I wanted to say, what all that rambling was building up to. Let yourself get close to people, because it’s worth it even if some people are awful and the world isn’t always a great place. Because even if you end up with some bad memories, the good ones are worth it. I’ve made some amazing memories this year, and I can’t wait to see what happens next.

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