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5ympathies · 03-14-2021, 12:05 AM

The only award by bum ass can and will win is the runners-up razov. I believe this to be even better and only players truly deserving will win this version instead of the regular version, because my version involves a sick alliteration. Three "r"'s in a row? Unreal. Anyway, what this award is, is for people that don't win the Razov, and unfortunately have to live with coming in second and third, and just living in disappointment because they were nominated and they had to wait 2 weeks to find out that they lost. Instead, they win the runners-up razov!! Very intuitively named, in my opinion. Anyway, continuing on and moving forth with this idea, winning this award also rewards you with $50 million SHL dollars. Slightly redundant for me to include the "$" before the number and saying dollars "afterwards" but oh well. Anyway, hopefully my player loses this award this season, and instead just wins the regular razov. We will see.

Thanks to JSS for the signature

GeckoeyGecko · 03-14-2021, 01:13 AM

JNH · 03-14-2021, 01:21 AM

Alright, so my bum-ass player would only ever win an award that was solely awarded to second place and even in that case they would probably finish one place back in 3rd.

But while we're talking about bum-ass players, let's talk about @SDCore His DOTY/60 has gone up since he left head office, a purely unrelated fact. However, he still struggles vastly in almost everything that he does. I propose that we create the "walked up the stairs without breaking a hip" Award. You may think that this is a low barrier, but you'd be surprised. Their hips get pretty fragile by that age.

Continuing with the topic of bum-ass players - have you met @bbp ? The only statistical category this guy could succeed in is PT's tagging JNH. Thus, we plan to create an award for least points scored in a full season. It's no guarantee that he'll win this as he may have a couple pucks bounced off his bum-ass and in, but we're giving him a real solid chance here.

***goldenglutes*** · 03-14-2021, 01:38 AM

@micool132
@Acsolap
@Briedaqueduc

Signatures by Vulfzilla, Jepox, Jess, rum_ham, Ragnar, and myself
[Image: 9vAsr7c.png]

Sopath · 03-14-2021, 02:05 AM

I think there should be an award for the best worst player in the SHL. Basically you are a terrible player. Your stats stink, you can't play, and you are better off being given as little time as possible. Yet you are necessary enough to keep staying around every year and despite the fact that you are bad, teams keep signing you. When I think of this player, I think of an aging SHL vet that teams keep signing as some kind of gimmick to draw fans to those early games. But every year that player seems to have a job no matter how bad they seem to be. It's an art form that should be respected with an award. But what do we call such an award? Something bad but endearing. Kind of like thanksgiving turkey. It's almost always awful yet we eat tons of it every year simply out of sentimentality, tradition, and conformity. It's a beautiful awful thing, just like the best worst player.

mee · 03-14-2021, 02:55 AM

My player is not very good. So my award will be given to the best player who excels at putting up points while also having a terrible corsi and a bad plus minus. The award shall be named the Biggest Showboat award, after my player himself. To win this award you have to only do the glamourous part of hockey. Having more than 1 hit a season is bad. Having more than 2 blocked shots a season is bad. The winner must only do the fun part of hockey. Additionally, scoring goals is far more important than assists. While traditional measures say a primary assist is worth about half a goal and a secondary around a tenth of a goal, for this award primary assists are treating as about a tenth of a goal and secondary assists worth about a hundredth of a goal. This award is for the do it yourselfer. The guy who only does offense.

**bbjygm** · 03-14-2021, 03:01 AM

For centuries, tales have been told of the awardees. An ancient and noble circle of the most elite players of the SHL, the awardees have the God-given to display their engraved, pewter mannequins on the shelf of their holy choosing. However, the masses deserve their due, for without them funneling pucks their way and dodging their slap shots, the awardees would have no recognition of their own relatively-superior performances. In order to commemorate these poor souls, I would introduce an award that could be earned by anyone. It would be called the Rando Award. It is awarded to a random player that has played in the current season, excluding all those who have previously earned an award (including the Rando Award from past seasons). It's awarded at the very end of the ceremony. The pool of nominees gets adjusted for the previous award winners of the very same ceremony, and then a random number is drawn associated with the nominee's place in the pool. My player is the current recipient of the award because 1) his luck is unquestionable, and 2) it prevents him from eligibility of the award in the future, for the sake of the rest of the player base. So generous.

Jala · 03-14-2021, 03:18 AM

I propose that the league honour the accomplishments of veteran players who just will not ride into the sunset, no matter how badly they need to. It would be called the Brenden Gibbins Award. I forget the name of the dude, but he was on Texas years ago and had less TPE then you start with by the end of his career, I think it was Gibbons.

Some players play well past their prime and regression kicks their ass and they become a boon for their team. Some manage to keep up with the TPE and they should also be honoured. This award would go to the oldest player who played during the season to immortalize the dedication they held for their players and the league as a whole. You don't manage to keep yourself in the league for 30 seasons without serious dedication and it would be a nice nod to immortalize some of those players in the annals of SHL history forever. This sort of award would also be less likely to cause any controversy but knowing the SHL there would be people who would feel slighted because they created their player 2 minutes before someone else, so you the award would obviously be open to having multiple winners annually. It's not a prestigious award, it's just something cool to look at years later.

Word Count: 193. I didn't count the part where I mentioned I forgot who the player actually was.

***CaptainCrazy*** · 03-14-2021, 04:49 AM

[Image: istockphoto-1138395421-612x612-1.jpg]

Zema · 03-14-2021, 05:57 AM

The SHL award for most handsome, cute or beautiful player.

An award voted on by the current crop of SMJHL drafted players to award who the best one of anything an SHL player is? Makes a ton of sense right?

Well, yes. This gives them a chance to completely dominate a category and vote for who they think is practically the best looking player. And why is this important?

Well, as an additional perk of winning this award comes extra money into your bank account! How much you say? Well, 10m SHL dollars I would say! This would become a very prestigious award immediately with a prize like that! You would see players such as Alexander Oscarsson, Alexander Oscarsson or maybe even Alexander Oscarsson battle for the number 1 prize in the first season! Even though all the SMJHL drafted players can vote, the only options should be the creator of the award for the first season to showcase how it works. It definitely needs a test round, yes...

***Pythonic*** · 03-14-2021, 06:18 AM

There's a number of awards that I could make up that my player, Valtterri Kauppinen, could win, but I'm going to go with a basic one: the "Best Player on the Worst (standings wise) Team Trophy." It might sound like kind of a rude award, but there's always those guys who are clearly amongst the great players of a league, but are stuck on a bottom feeding team (for instance, Connor McDavid or Leon Draisaitl on the Edmonton Oilers, or John Gibson on the Anaheim Ducks). This trophy rewards those who stick with a team like that without ripping out their hair, and recognizes their concentration and dedication to the game of hockey. As we all know, the Vancouver Whalers have struggled wholesale this past season coming into the playoffs, but hell, there's even a few other candidates for the award on that team excluding my guy: players like Ako Zile and Nikolaj Boyle, for instance, who have put up similar numbers to Valtterri Kauppinen.

lilstifler · 03-14-2021, 08:35 AM

So, I'd even say my present player isn't worthy of titles at all. But especially for him and maybe other players would be willing to give the award for the most falls on the ice during the season. In their stature, the smaller and most unstable players with a peaceful heart could receive this gift and feel good, because hockey is nevertheless a kind of entertainment industry that makes money. So the prize would be the most for falls, but an original name would be required. Since originality is not the strongest part of me, I am prepared to give the copyright of my prize to someone else. Perhaps he would be the best prize teacher. Overall, looking at the league level makes it difficult to find something so original that only one particular player can get it. Hopefully, the league board will figure out to introduce one of the awards for this task, which would certainly generate positive feelings among all the league members.

majesiu · 03-14-2021, 09:29 AM

affiliation http://probaseballexperience.jcink.net/i...ntry287943

**The__Y-man__100** · 03-14-2021, 10:01 AM

This award would represent my legacy that I have on this site. the ability to build decent players, but they are never good enough to win SHL championships. We would call it, Y-man award. Playing on the words "why man", which is typically said to someone who does something that is not nice. Having been to multiple finals with Toronto, New England, New Orleans and Manhattan over my longgg time on this site, I have never actually been able to pull of the final W. A little sad indeed, but sometimes that's how life is. The debate between destiny and our ability to change it is a conversation that goes all the way back to ancient Greece and if history has shown me one thing, you can not fight it. So why not have some fun with my constant disappointment and misery and make this new award. I am sure there are at least a couple long time vets out there who still haven't won their first SHL cup

First ever Yukon Malamute draft pick (1st overall S65)

Jorec · 03-14-2021, 10:07 AM

The giveaway award. An award in the form of a hockey player, mid-fall with his hand out streatched in an attempt to stop the puck, also on the award from being taken away from him. You might think that this would be simply given out to the player who has the worst giveaway statistic but no. This award would be for the player with the worst combined defensive effort. I'm talking plus minus, give aways, low shot blocks. The whole defensive shebang of ugly. If there is a stat that indicates you're bad at defence, then it's factored into who gets it. I feel that Adrik Baranov would get it at this point in career because he is very, very bad at defence. As talented as he is offensively right now, he equals that out by being a liability on the ice. He might improve his defence in the future but it'd be nice to get some recognition of just how bad he is now.

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