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NUCK · 05-07-2024, 06:27 AM

I feel that the players in Maine know when and when not they need to bring their A Game. It's a team that has hardly stumbled at all over the last decade of play and this season was no difference. After a mediocre start to the year, the players and staff put their foot down and drove the team to a very successful season, seeing them finish the regular season as the top team in their conference. All while they were only a middle of the pack team for the first 24 games. Now with the post season at hand, it's easy to see that Maine management has the players humming along. I really don't feel that anything special needs to be said to this group of players. Everyone from the trainers to the PA broadcasters know their role by this point in the season and it helps management keep the ship upright with easy when everyone buys into the Timber system.

Rtpc31 · 05-07-2024, 07:45 AM

The simulation hockey league has employed a proven, time tested method to prevent injuries and diagnoses that is implemented for many non-fake hockey players all across the country. This method is practiced by many businesses around the United States, with lethal efficiency and effectiveness. Other countries have yet to evolve to embrace this system and this proves that the SHL is on the cutting edge of medicine and handling of player injuries. The answer is simple. They simply do not provide health insurance to their players, coaches, or staff. Therefore, no one is able to see a physician with potential ailments and, thus, cannot be considered to be injured and, therefore, must continue to play and come to work. The teams also do not have team doctors, trainers, or therapists to further prevent the identification of any injury. It really is amazing that other leagues have not employed these methods as they have proven to be incredibly cost effective for the league.

163 words

soevil · 05-07-2024, 08:24 AM

Austin Morley will have to do everything in his power to ensure that the Manhattan Rage emerge victorious and make it to the second round of the SHL playoffs. Down 0-2 in the series already, Morley will have his work cut out for him. His play during the season was near identical to last season - which earned him a nomination for the "Most Improved" player award - but he had hoped that he would take yet another leap this year and truly shine as one of the SHLs best young Centers. Morley will have to try and rally the troops to move on and prove he is "Mister do it all". He will need to better facilitate the offense by creating better shots for his teammates and attempting more shots himself (the Rage are being doubled in shot attempts by the Stampede in the series). On defense he will be charged with not only checking the best Stampede scorers, but also with setting the tone for the rest of the series with his aggressive play style. All in all, it is possible that Austin Morley is just a "good but not great" player. Able to hang with the big boys, but not able to elevate those around him to new heights like the truly great players can do. The rest of this series will define Morley's career. He must go "Mad Cow" mode and put the team on his back to become legend, but should he fail, he becomes yet another disappointing chapter in the Manhattan Rage history book. (260)

***Figgy*** · 05-07-2024, 08:33 AM

I'm not sure what everyone else in the league does, but prior to every game Dan painstakingly wraps his entire body in bubble wrap before putting on the rest of his equipment. Dan also maintains his body like the temple that it is. What I mean by that is he works out unforgivingly for 30 minutes a week and eats plenty of fried foods. In other words this is all a joke and I think that the lack of injuries in this league is either a testament to how naturally gifted and healthy all of these players are, or just proves my beliefs that everyone in this league has been sent down from another planet where injuries do not exist and the body naturally heals itself in record time therefor leading to no lost games to injury. Which is it? I guess we truly will never know will we? *Cue X-Files theme*

Credit to Ragnar and Enigmatic for the great Signatures

By-Tor · 05-07-2024, 08:43 AM

Option 2:

I think Beck can step it up. He has been good, but not great the past 2.5 seasons and now is the time to breakout again. Winnipeg was able to take the first two games against NOLA led by the amazing play of all his teammates. Games 3 and 4 AT HOME are ripe for Beck to take control and shutdown the opposing Specters offense. I think by focusing on the defensive side first, which he has always done, is the key to unlocking the transition offense that we know is present in his game. Regression has taken a step out of his stride over the past few seasons, but he still has that raw skill to contribute up front. He just needs a little bit of luck on his side. While I'm looking forward to the offense, Beck can really contribute in the non flashy ways - blocks, takeaways, limit opponent shots and chances to help the fantastic Shaggy to do their job well. I can feel it all coming together and we will all have a big part to play.

Credit to enigmatic, Merica, tweedledunn, and jaypc8237 for sigs

***Frenchie*** · 05-07-2024, 10:06 AM

Whikadoodle · 05-07-2024, 10:14 AM

I know exactly why we have had no injuries in the SHL for many many seasons. It is not that we're invincible, or that we are living in a simulation. It is complete, blind luck. We are the luckiest group of athletes who have ever lived. We defy the odds every additional day we go out on the ice. Some may say it's better conditioning, others may say it's new and improved nutrition. But that is all baloney! It is nothing but plain dumb luck. We should be called the SHL - Some Huge Luck! We should all rename our teams to the Lucky Leprechauns. We should all by scratch offs! Nothing can stop us when we are this lucky. We can do anything we want with no physical repercussions! What a time to be a lucky group of hockey players! We can go all the way to the moon! Yes, the moon! We are the luckiest people alive!

(161)

MN_Moosey · 05-07-2024, 10:17 AM

PBE Affiliate

Bayley · 05-07-2024, 11:09 AM

This season was not a great one for Bayle. She did have 20 goals which is great, but only 35 assists for a total of 55 points with a +21. So, honestly, it was not a great season, however, the playoffs is going to have to be better. Already in the 2 games, she does have 3 goals, so we are looking up. She did have 1 point more last season while having a better shot percentage and more time on ice, so there's a lot to work on. I think, finally, we are working on getting better and getting into the playoff spirit. It is all about getting into the mentality and upping everything to get to playoff speed and playoff intensity. I do think she will live up to the hype and figure it all out as we are going throughout the playoffs. The goal would be MVP in the playoffs as that is something that would be so great for her career.

*Carpy48* · 05-07-2024, 02:13 PM

Option 2
At the time of writing, we just finished round one, so we won't really know yet how the rest of the playoffs will continue. Let's look at the regular season first. I would say my player had a decent season. It wasn't really comparable to last season, because I made the switch from backup goalie to starting goalie of the Aurora and with fewer games played backups often have better numbers - like mine last season - but regardless of games played, I would still call it decent. Perhaps not McBride-level good, but I'm happy with my regular season. I helped my team make the playoffs and that was the most important part. The first round of the playoffs surprised me a little, especially the first two games which were particularly good for my player - on paper (100 GR). It's difficult to say whether we can keep this up as a team, but at this point I do hope for a deep run. Right now everything looks pretty promising and by playing only 4 games there will be plenty of time to rest until the next game. Don't underestimate rest.

*AuggieO* · 05-07-2024, 02:24 PM

It's not that they don’t get injured- it’s the recovery time. When a SHL player gets hit really hard on the ice and their femur snaps in two- their supersonic superhuman superfast body begins the repair process in milliseconds. The leg snaps itself back to its pre-break straightness, the supercells rush to the site and begin rebuilding bone. What’s even more impressive is that as the players get injured and get repaired, they become stronger and less prone to injuries. Your ACL tore last season? It’s now stronger than the strongest non SHL players ACL. Tear it again? It will be 100x stronger than the average ACL. It does come at the cost of having to get a supersonic superhuman superfast shot at the beginning of the season but the players say that it is worth it. The shot is rainbow colored and most players choose to get the injection in their arm- but they can get it in their thigh if they prefer. Since the invention of this awesome shot there has been 0 missed games due to injury- Huzzah!

Words- 181

*Puppy* · 05-07-2024, 02:28 PM

Written Option 2:

Having been on the bench or ice for 3 seasons of playoffs now, Ju-gong is about as veteran as it gets for things in the SMJHL. Despite that, last season was their worst run of things, having a humiliating run of games against Colorado that easily rank among the worst in his short career so far. With that memory still fresh in mind, Ju-gong has been spending extra time and effort to make sure that he hits the tops of his game when it counts. Regular season success only means so much to the young Korean, and his ultimate goal for this season was to perform in the matches that count. Much of the team seems to share the same focus, and QCC are itching to face Kelowna and whatever teams follow. The cup is the ultimate goal, but simply putting on performances that can be looked back on proudly takes the cake for now. Ju-gong is primed and ready to give it his all for this potentially final chase at the Four Star.

swoosh · 05-07-2024, 02:45 PM

Graphic Option 2: Create an image that shows your player breaking their personal record for any training related activity.

[Image: CD5M9Zv.png]

*Mutedfaith* · 05-07-2024, 02:50 PM

Prompt 2

PLAYOFFS ARE HERE! Time to stop coasting and fucking around and up our game to the limit. We've had a whole season to just freewheel all over the ice and have some fun, this is the time when the magic happens and we have to make things click and connect. No more stickhandling in our own zone, to try to fake out an opponent, just because we can. No more aiming for the goalies funny parts, rather than putting the puck past them in the net. No more hitting people just for the sake of hitting people and ending up taking a bad penalty to put the team a man down. From now on, we're just going to have to focus and win us some games. The Minnesota Monarchs have the skills and talent to beat anyone on any ice at any time. It's about damn time we show it, step up and go get that cup (although I would also sign up for just getting past round 1 for a change).

tomtommen · 05-07-2024, 03:05 PM

Written Option 1: Despite high speeds, countless hits and blocked shots somehow no SHL player has missed a game to injury in who knows how long. How does the league do it? Are players pumped up with so many drugs and steroids that nothing can hurt them? Better doctors than money can buy to operate anyone during intermission? Clones? Is it all just a simulation?

The SHL's remarkable streak of injury-free games is revealed to be the result of a highly advanced simulation technology. Both FHM, discord and web pages are in use. Within this simulated reality, players glide effortlessly across the ice, executing precise passes, delivering bone-crushing checks, and firing blistering shots on goal. All without fear of injury. Behind the scenes, a team of expert programmers and people working for in-game cash maintains the simulation, ensuring that every aspect of the game. But why a simulation? Because it is fun. It's a playground of possibilities, where the boundaries of what's possible are limited only by the imagination of those who play in it. The only fear is the users ripping their hair off their heads in agony when their team loses in the ploofs. Or people going away for an extended period (some forever) because they have a real life as well. How rude of them. We all live in the matrix.

Words: 161

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